@ OP “I’m wondering if parents who have kids in boarding school could help me understand why they do it.”
Why do you need to understand this??
Just as a PSA, it’s worth highlighting the societal risk posed by hundreds of graduating boarding school students each June. With little more than a diploma and a brimming mind and spirit, these kids are unleashed into society, children from the sorts of loveless homes @ThacherParent describes, who can barely remember what a familial relationship feels like since severing all ties at the age of 14, or 13 in some particularly heartless cases. Every now and then, some of these kids become unhinged and wag clenched fists at the moon, wailing “Mom, dad, why did you abandon me to a place that has an unbelievably positive peer culture, where one can be a football player and a dancer and not be mocked, where the faculty are deeply and authentically engaged in my well-being and advancement (intellectually, emotionally and every other way) and where I will be forever stuck with the baggage of rich and lasting friendships, a place where I was forced to bridge cultural and other divides by getting to know people who live in weird places. Damn you mom or Mr and Mrs whateveryournameis. You’ve given me the opportunity to grow roots and branches that I can never now ungrow.” It’s surprising to me we don’t have more foster programs available to help reintroduce these poor kids back into the mainstream, help them deal with whatever attachment disorders they’ve surely acquired, and show them what real parenting is like.
1 Like
@Corcaigh: Well played, well played…
I have to laugh at the “sending kids away” comment. When our son opened his first BS acceptance letter, the first words out of his happy 14-year-old mouth were, “See you later, Mom!”
If you want to get a handle on how badly some kids want this, check out the Prep School Admissions forum in the months just before March 10th (decision day for many of the boarding schools the kids here covet). Let the kids tell you why they want to go. It’s generally not because their parents are beating them. 
Boarding school has been very tough for us, but we put on a brave face for our son’s sake. As I always say: For as much as we miss him, he’s missing nothing.
@Corcaigh…wish there was a LOVE button. Bravo!
I like this …
http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/discussion/comment/15609992/#Comment_15609992
I’m hoping DS would attend a college close to home.
Now that some BS parents have provided some genuine/touching/humorous answers, where is our OP?
His kids had him sent away to boarding school. 
@Corcaigh , I wish your son had chosen Mercersburg so we could further discuss abusive parenting techniques, preferably while counting our polo ponies or whatever else it is that prep parents do in their spare time.
Not a BS parent, but it seems obvious to me that Boarding Schools fill an important niche. They’ve been around longer than public schools and they are obviously adapting and thriving in the modern world.
It was never a choice for us (even if we could have afforded it, my kids are not the independent type) but I like that there are still different models and choices for education. One size does not fit all.
Because I read all the BS (stuff) and I’m wondering about it?
Off-topic: Why is it that half the earlier posts weren’t visible when I posted, so that I was thus allowed to repeat what other people had already said, which I frequently enough and embarrassingly do of my own accord?
I attended a boarding school, but as a day student as my parents lived nearby. It never occurred to me to send our kids to BS because the reasons FOR sending them didn’t apply to us. Glad, however, it is an option for others who need/want BS for whatever reasons. Thank you to those of you who have shared your reasons for allowing your kids to attend BS. You have enlightened me, even though, as mentioned, I attended a BS.
As many others have posted, this is something that our son desperately wanted. I think it’s funny when people judge boarding school parents saying that they don’t understand why we send them away. This is something that I did for HIM. My sons high school experience isn’t about me; parenting isn’t about me. We let him make this choice because it is best for him. It definitely isn’t best for me, but that’s not what parenting is about.
Did any of u watch “Waiting for Superman”? There was the story of the poor kid being raised by his grandma. Both grandma & boy wanted for the boy to escape a dysfunctional community and go to a free public boarding school. Admission was by lottery.
I’ve often wondered if there should be more public boarding schools. If we can’t fix the dysfunction in the community, then we can give WILLING students the avenue to escape the dysfunction.
@OP So you have read all the BS “stuff” and you still wondering about it? Now I don’t understand…seem like every point of view possible has been expressed on this prep school forum.
I “sent 8-| her away” because I refused to be selfish. That’s as simple and truthful as I can put it. My daughter wanted to attend a boarding school. We live in a city where she was attending a private school. She could have remained here attending another private HS but she loved the idea of BS. She wanted to attend school and live with people from all over the world…the idea of community was important for her. I refused to stand in her way because having her home would make me feel better…it would benefit me not her. I was forced to attend a HS that I didn’t want because my parents made the decision and I was miserable. I couldn’t do that to her…I could not be selfish. It is difficult having her away but to my surprise, I get to see her A LOT! The vacation breaks are really long and I feel like our relationship has grown closer.
Like a friend told me when she brought up BS to me (way before my daughter knew it existed)…“don’t turn your “nose up” to it until you give it a chance and check it out. Glad I listened to her and gave it a chance.”
@twinsmama It is my loss to be sure that I will not have the opportunity to compare best practices in Baroness Schraeder parenting with you (see that BS really does stand for something). For instance, did your son also recoil in horror when he realized no more will he be able to develop the close bonds he had with his parents at home, albeit from one floor below, while engaging in online video simulations with strangers for hours? That avatar of a frog is really going to miss him. I cackle at the thought of him cavorting in great big puppy piles of actual boys and girls, people who breathe and sweat. Pure evil!
Perhaps we “BS” parents could form our own secret society. HADES springs to mind. But why is it that I feel that name may already be taken - and is that a coincidence?
@Corcaigh… I like the cut of your jib.
Between the two of us, I’m not the one who assumes things. It’s possible my ‘understanding bucket’ needs more filling than yours.