<p>My daughter was recently admitted to Michigan. She likes it but is undecided. She was also admitted to a few other significantly lower ranking schools two of which she really likes. All of her friends and family are incredulous that she wouldn't automatically attend Michigan which has a devout following around here. The other schools are not ones many people here attend. They tell me I should be really pushing her to attend because a Michigan degree will do more for her in the future. Thoughts? </p>
<p>Assuming finances are not an issue, I’d encourage her to attend the school that is the best fit for her. Period.</p>
<p>Money is not an issue in the mix. Michigan is much closer than the other schools so my own selfish reason I’d like her to attend is that I know how much of a pain it is when a kid has to fly to school. But I’m keeping that to myself. 
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<p>I knew of someone whose children were admitted to UW-Madison but chose to attend UW-Whitewater instead. This sounds similar to what you are describing. These kids wanted a smaller school and the parents were supportive of the decision. And acquintances and friends were quite surprised as well.</p>
<p>This can only backfire. As a parent, I would want her to go to the school with the best fit. She should chose for herself.</p>
<p>To me, it matters why she likes the other colleges better. There can be good, bad, or even erroneous reasons for preferring one college over another. Visiting all the schools may help.</p>
<p>Fit trumps prestige.</p>
<p>I chose fit which meant turning down Michigan for a lower ranked school. </p>
<p>Must’ve done ok since Michigan and Ivies admitted me for grad school. </p>
<p>Go for fit. </p>
<p>I would let her go to the one that has the best fit and not based on the name. However, I would heed @Hunt’s advice. Why does she want to go to the other schools? Is it because a boyfriend is going there? Is her best girlfriend going there? If your D is anything like mine, I can see why Michigan would not be right for her and she may know this. I see the pics of her friends and they are having the time of their life. However, my D is not into the sports scene, party scene, large school scene, so where she is a better fit.</p>
<p>Have an adult conversation with her, maybe do another visit to them now that she is in, and see where the chips fall. But, as parents have said, forcing her to a school that she knows up front is not a fit for her is asking for trouble.</p>
<p>Your daughter is attending college…not the neighbors, friends, or you. Since she applied to these other schools, she must like them for a good reason. Let her choose.</p>
<p>I agree that fit is the most important thing–but I think it’s important to do a pretty deep dive into which schools are the best fit. So have conversations with your D about it–go on visits, talk to other people–ask her to really do her research. If one of the other schools really is a better fit, then she should be able to persuade you that it is–or at least that it’s a rational choice.</p>
<p>Choosing a college based on Best fit for the student is a good foundation for a successful college experience. Ask intelligent questions at a time when your child is willing to speak honestly and openly to get some detailed feedback. What is it about the “lesser” schools that she likes? Has she visited all the schools up for consideration? Maybe a second visit to each one would give you more confidence that she is choosing based on logical reasons and not just because “all her friends” are going there.</p>
<p>If you get any gut feeling that she is NOT basing her college decision using logic and factual data, then you can step in and try to engage her in conversation. Does the college have the major/majors she is interested in, does she prefer big school/sports scene/urban vs rural locale, etc.</p>
<p>Can’t say enough about multiple visits to schools. A good or bad tour guide, bad weather, one cranky professor, off day for food in the cafeteria can all mislead a high school student. And Admissions can use fancy marketing to try to wow a student, even when what they are boasting about might not have an impact on your student (Honors College, research opportunities abroad, expensive new science labs, etc.)</p>
<p>It can be hard to resist the influence of family and friends, but it is in your child’s best interest to choose the school that is the best fit, not the most popular.</p>
<p>Really good advice everyone. I just scheduled admitted students days visits. </p>
<p>Fit is everything. I turned down a more prestigious school to go to Mount Holyoke and never looked back. A friend of my daughter really wanted to go to Tulane or Vanderbilt, but went with a small LAC close to home because her father was being treated for cancer and his prognosis was uncertain. She was miserable there. She transferred to Vanderbilt this year and loves it.</p>
<p>So much of fit is really mental attitude. If you are convinced a place is right for you, you will make it right for you. That’s why it’s so hard to overcome “gut feelings” about a school using reason and statistics alone.</p>
<p>I know someone who would have been in the running for a “big name” school (and was a potential recruited athlete at a particular top 10 school) and who is choosing Augustana College (which is a tiny, relatively unknown college) for some specific fit reasons. Money is not the issue. His mother believes the school may be “beneath him” (not said in a snotty way, just a recognition that he was a top student) but agrees that these particular fit issues may be important in his life right now given other personal things that have gone on with their family.</p>
<p>Personally, the “prestige differences” in 10, 20 place differences in USNWR are six of one, half a dozen of the other. I would call schools that close generally in the same prestige band. </p>
<p>Also, if you let her choose, she will own the choice. So if she is not completely happy at her choice of school, she won’t be complaining about being forced by her parents to go to a school that she does not like.</p>
<p>The problem with choosing a college for “fit” is that it’s hard to know in advance whether the atmosphere of a college will suit you (there are several colleges that really appeal to me in theory even though I probably wouldn’t have enjoyed attending them, but it’s possible that I’m worse at introspection than most people). Rankings and financial aid are more certain at the outset, and it’s easier to change your perception of a school than it is to improve their rankings or get more money from them. </p>
<p>Since my kid hates her “prestige” school I would say opt for fit. We knew she wouldn’t be happy but she wanted the degree from the top school. My current college applicant wants this same school and we are trying to talk her out of it even though it is probably a bit better fit for her than it was for her sister. </p>
<p>A good friend of ours has 2 brothers who are way up the food chain at 2 major Universities and both of them told us that where you went for your Masters is the only thing that counts if you are going past a BA or BS. They both suggested going to an average school for undergrad and excelling, then parlaying that into a good masters program. It’s just something to think about if your child has plans beyond undergrad. </p>
<p>I would encourage my kid to attend the school I think was the best choice out of the offers of admissions. It could be the most prestigious, it might not be. No guarantee. Prestige would be a factor involved, as would cost distance, academic offerings, atmosphere, all kinds of things. </p>
<p>Nothing wrong with encouraging someone towards a direction you prefer. Nothing at all. And as a parent, do note the pluses and minuses of her choices. But at the end of the day, IMO, it’s best to let the kid choose, because s/he’s the one who has to live 24/7 with the choice and when things go wrong, and things will go wrong, they always do, it’s a strong point in ones favor to have the kid at the college of his/her choice not yours. People love to blame other people for anything that goes wrong. My one son has experienced all of the issues I pointed out about his choice of college (not my first choice) but that he picked the school, I’m sure, makes him not bring them up or harp on them but try to work with it. It’s a powerful point to have in one’s favor with the college kid.</p>
<p>The kid might still say, “Why didn’t you stop me?”</p>