<p>We are homeschooling our son, who is multi gifted but has pretty much dedicated himself to music (we homeschooled because in the crazy world of the kind of music he is going into, it is almost impossible to do a regular school program and devote the time and energy to the music it needs), he technically is a freshman but is in sophomore year academically. Before we did this, he went to private schools, because though our local schools are decent, they don’t do much for the really bright kids, their attitude is sadly what many say when you talk about the needs of the really out there kids, that ‘if they are so bright, they will do fine’ or the other one I sort of heard on here “the child has to learn to deal with people of all levels” (which is true, but that is also self serving drivel, because learning to get along with people of all levels doesn’t mean destroying what is special in the child, which is what a lot of schools do, as i know only too well). Before he homeschooled, he was in private schools (that often aren’t much better with g and t kids then public schools), but we were lucky, they challenged him, they didn’t just leave him bored or tell him to do more worksheets or ‘why don’t you act as a teacher’s assistant and help the slower moving kids’ as an answer, they challenged him but in a way where he wasn’t isolated or made to feel different, I still think of those teachers nightly…</p>
<p>Most homeschoolers I know of (and in the music and dance world it is pretty common for people to do this) don’t just rely on the parents. My son is using an accredited online program and it is working for him, and for socialization he spends a lot of time with other kids doing his music stuff, so he is in good shape that way, there are plenty of resources out there. There are issues with homeschooling, some kids kind of drift, and it can be an easy way to get lost without focus. </p>
<p>I tend to agree with other posters that one of the big things is to find what motivates your son, the kind of things that will drive him forward in his path. It could be music, it could be science, it could be a lot of things. There are programs for the gifted out there, there is the stanford program, the summer programs like Johns Hopkins, programs like the Gifted Child Society in NJ (or the equivalent other places), and a wide range of things he might like to do, like scouting or other groups, or a local first aid group or whatever,which can be interesting and yes, introduce him to other kids and adults different then himself. (BTW, this isn’t true of just the really bright kids, all kids need that challenge). My son did little league and I think got a lot out of it (he still loves sports as a fan), and other things ‘normal’ kids do as well.</p>
<p>One of the things that i totally, totally agree with what other posters have written is that your son needs to learn organizational and study and work skills, and this is even more important if he homeschools. Speaking from direct experience in my own time in school, when kids are really bright, learn things fast, they often don’t gain the study skills, it comes to easily, they sail through, and then later when the really hard stuff hits, that challenges even them, they can have real problems dealing with it, because at that level you have to work. In my son’s case, I mentioned the private school he went to in grade school, and there they emphasized study skills and organizational skills, they didn’t assume that a kid doing well in class had good study skills, they made them work at it, even if it seemed ridiculous to do so with an A student, and it continues to pay off (our son is organized and disciplined; between that background, and then the incredible discipline that is required to think of even going anywhere near music, let alone succeed in it, he has learned it, he at 14 is literally driving his own destiny, with us simply being there to help guide him (well, okay, he is 14 and sometimes does need a good kick in the rear, metaphorically, he isn’t perfect <em>lol</em>). </p>
<p>There are programs out there that can teach those kinds of things, I think Kumon and other programs offer study skills workshops, it is worth doing, and I am sure other groups offer it as well.</p>
<p>I also want to touch on what others have said, that sometimes kids who are put in G and T programs or are homeschooled because they are gifted, can be obnoxious and smug, but that is not a natural consequence of doing that, that is the parents, not the children in my experience. One of the things I highly recommend based on our own experience is to work to help your son achieve but keep it low key, and also don’t put the pressure on him, give him time to develop and find his passions. One of the most horrible problems gifted kids face, especially ones who are multi talented, is being forced to do things they may not want to do even though they have an apititude, like for example a student who is good in math and science and immediately pushing the kid on a science track to become a doctor, simply because he is talented there. Gifts are a funny thing, a kid may have a gift and may not want to use it at all or in conventional ways, and I have seen a lot of parents either trumpet the kid being ‘a genius’ or push them into things they don’t want to, and the kids either end up depressed, or end up as obnoxious, full of themselves young adults, and it isn’t pleasant to be around. </p>
<p>In music, there are a ton of kids like that, kids who do have musical talent, who have been pushed, young ‘prodigies’ put on stage playing difficult works and treated like a trained monkey, or kids being forced to practice X hours a day on something they don’t really want to do, because the parents think that if you have ability, you do it (which again, tells a lot about the parents, not the child), and from personal experience I can tell you that those kids generally end up not doing squat in music, because they don’t have the passion or they get so full of themselves they start believing the PR their parents are pushing out, and end up alienating everyone else…</p>
<p>Kids need the time to smell the roses or fool around, too. Our son might be seriously working at music, playing and practicing and listening to music and in ensembles, etc, but he also can spend time vegging out or playing video games, too…</p>
<p>Hope this gives some ideas, I wrote it after a long day of work, and just remember, my son is the gifted one <em>lol</em></p>
Sniff sniff</p>