Academic Dismissal Appeal Petition Letter Review Please :)

Dear Committee Members:
I am requesting a revocation of my dismissal from the College of Liberal Arts & Sciences.
I spent a large portion of my youth feeling as if I was stuck in a deep rut, and usually no matter what counseling I sought I could never find a way out of the it. I saw S. Gibbons, a counselor at the Women’s Resource and Action Center on campus for the entirety of 1st semester and a portion of 2nd semester and I found myself slightly better but unable to shake this constant feeling of dread and disappointment. When I arrived home to x, x this summer and got the e-mail notifying me of my dismissal I visited a Psychiatrist to find the root of my problems. I was diagnosed with Dysthymic Disorder and Panic Disorder. Dysthymic Disorder is a chronic form of depression, which tends to last several years and a Panic Disorder can include frequent panic attacks and episodes of extreme anxiety, which can often act like a paralytic. I had also been diagnosed in the past with Irritable Bowel Syndrome before coming to university, which is a digestive disorder often caused and worsened by stress. IBS and depression when combined can lead to a worsening of both conditions. The supporting documentation you will receive is from my Psychiatrist Dr.x detailing my diagnoses.
Having spent years undiagnosed, I often turned to myself as the root of the problem which lead only to my levels of stress and anxiety increasing, which in turn affected my IBS and made a normal routine life difficult. On top of feeling ashamed for not being able to be healthy emotionally or physically like everyone else, I entered my first real romantic relationship and exited it. I found it incredibly difficult to deal with these stressors while spending my first year away form home on the other side of the world. I found myself caught in a vicious cycle of barely having the energy to get up and out of my bed to do work, go to classes, eat healthy and get off of probation and yet feeling a tremendous amount of guilt and anxiety over my own inabilities and their nearing consequences.
I know that I still had control over my academics and that is one of the reasons I made improvement in my grade-point-average but I also know that the jump from 1.13 to 1.92 was not enough. However, I do believe now that I know what had prevented me from doing my best and contributed to my increased struggles and am seeking treatment for it that I will be able to thrive at the University of Iowa and contribute to its prosperous environment. I do apologize for not meeting the standards for good standing. I write this letter not in hopes of absolving myself of blame or of wiping my slate clean but to ask the Committee members to take into account the mental health problems I was dealing with and offer me a second chance to prove my capability and intellect in a healthier state of mind.

Sincerely,

Im appealing to uiowa which has a pretty strict letter format for appeals: 3 paragraphs, concise, detailing the circumstances that lead to your dismissal and what supporting documentation they can expect to receive. I’d love anyones input

This is great. You will get let back in or into your original university.

It is unfortunate that you have these problems. However, the problem with emphasizing the chronic, long-standing nature of your problems is that it makes it sound unlikely that things will change for you anytime soon. I suggest getting rid of the discussion of your long-standing problems (which means getting rid of much of the discussion in paragraphs 1 and 2) and focusing on what was your problem this last year and what will you do differently next year.

You could start with: I would like to appeal my dismissal from the University of Iowa. Last year, I did not do well in school. I eventually found out that I have X disorder along with irritable bowel syndrome. Both of these prevented me from doing my best and my GPA was 1.13 in the first semester and 1.92 in the second semester. Starting in the middle of last year, I started getting care from xxxxx. As a result, my health is much improved and my GPA did increase from the first semester to the second (but not enough) Over the summer, I have continued to get care from X and Y and my health has continued to improve. If I am allowed to return to the university, these are the steps I will take to be successful: x, y, and z.