Anyone else sick of being so pressured to succeed.

<p>I'm really getting so burned out lately. The last two weeks have been a roller coaster for me in terms of feeling motivated vs. having no idea where I'm going in life and why I'm even trying. I'm only a sophomore in high school, and I have no idea what I want to do with my life. This is completely normal, yet many of my friends know exactly what they want to do. Me, I have about 5 things I think I might like, but I don't know for sure. What I want to do changes by the day, even by the hour. Yet I'm pushing myself so hard in both academics and extracurriculars. There's really no point in me listing what I've done; it's irrelevant. I jast have no idea why I'm trying so hard. </p>

<p>That's rambling off topic. </p>

<p>I had what wasn't really an argument, but a moment of extreme frustration earlier. There's this program I decided to apply to for this summer. It looked really awesome and is at these great colleges. There are a couple essays on the application, and I've been struggling with one of them. If it were an interview, I would absolutely ace it. I know everything I should about it. I'm just having such a hard time articulating it on paper. I'm trying to keep it focused and rather than just regurgitate facts just explain why they are important. But the challenge there is that the importance of many of the things is quite obvious, and I also don't want to point out the obvious. Once again, getting off topic. She's angry at me because it's taken me so long and she thinks that I should use the same essay from another program I applied to and fix it up to make it more relevant. I can't do that, because this other essay was for a business program and was on the topic of outsourcing. This program is about politics, the particular thing I want to do there is con law, and outsourcing had absolutely nothing to do with con law. My issue is also in the fact that the essay does not at all reflect my interest in politics or history, something the prompt explicitly called for. It shows an interest in business, which I ironically don't have at all. I did it because she told me to apply to that program because it's really prestigious. My true interest is in politics and history, and my knowledge and understanding of it is really pretty good. I don't mean that at all to brag, it's just my best and by far favorite subject.</p>

<p>She then continued to tell me that if I don't want to do this, she has no reason to spend the money and I might as well save the time and not write the essay (I really do want to attend this program. It's a chance for me to go study a very interesting thing to me at one of the most prestigious and beautiful campuses. Not to mention the weather there will be much better than here). She also said that if I want to do this, then it's on me and I have every reason to write the essay (Touche). What made me the most angry though is that she said that no matter what I choose, I will not be spending the summer sleeping in until noon and watching sports until the end of the day.</p>

<p>That set me off for a couple reasons. One, sleeping until noon is a complete exaggeration and something I do extremely rarely. I physically cannot sleep past 10:30 under normal circumstances. Two, believe me and I would know better than anyone else, that I do not want to waste my summer. I really do want to learn.</p>

<p>But what if I do want to just chill out over the summer? Haven't I earned it? For most of my friends, the only work they will do over the summer is their summer reading which many of them will put off until the last two weeks of vacation. Why do they deserve a vacation and not me, who (not that bitter about this because I take on the work myself) works much harder than any of them? So many of them do the minimum and live for a B, but a B for me is really pretty disappointing. </p>

<p>It's not like if I don't do something this summer I won't get into college. There are tons of colleges bombarding me with mail already. I'm completely confidant that my stats on paper and ECs will get me somewhere really good. So it's not like this is life and death here. </p>

<p>I recognize that it is her job as a parent to push me. I just don't really appreciate it. </p>

<p>Supposing I was a B student. Sometimes I pulled off an A, occasionally slacked off and got a C. I'm likely headed to one of the smaller state schools (no plight against them, I'm not too too maniacal about prestige, but unfortunately a little bit. I do recognize they are very good for many people). Would she (and I keep referencing she because it is mainly my mom who is pressuring me. My dad is the one that tells me he's proud of me and sees how hard I'm working. He has no idea how far that goes) still push me this much? If I'm a B student, I'm not exactly a failure, but no overachiever either. Would I be subjected to even more pressure to follow in my sisters footsteps, who graduated second and third in their classes and got into the schools of their choice? Would they be disappointed in me and look at me as the failure? I have no idea. But I think it might be a little nice to be like that. No spectacular expectations, so nothing is too disappointing. I sure would have a lot more time for myself. I would have a lot more fun. But then, I remember that I've been blessed to be smart and have these opportunities. I should be thankful that I will likely have my choice of career paths. I really don't know where I'm going with this anymore. </p>

<p>Another thought as to the cause of the pressure. The last couple of weeks a lot of the programs I've talked about centered around law. My mom is a lawyer, and she tells anyone with a brain to consider law. I know she thinks I should seriously consider law and blah blah blah. I am considering it. The last week or so it's been at the top of the list of things I want to be. Whatever.</p>

<p>One more grievance. If I come home with, say, an 83 on a test (which isn't that common. This year I've had I think 3 tests that were below a B+) she always asks what I could have done differently to prepare. Do I feel the teacher taught the material? What will I do next time. Please shut up. I put a ton of pressure on myself already. I don't need that. When I get a bad grade, I recognize it's nobody's fault but mine. Last week, I had a big bio test on a really hard thing (which is in fact what she said, I suppose). I didn't really study much and definitely not as much as I should have. I also chose to stay up until 1:30 to see the end of the Syracuse UConn 6OT game (big Cuse fan, wasn't gonna miss it). The next day, I took the test. Didn't feel too good about it. I did a lot of BSing and educated guessing. There were quite a few questions, even some essays, that I flat out didn't know anything about. I came home and told her I didn't think I did so hot, and I got all the normal questions. I was especially POed because she didn't even hang up the phone to talk to me (that's an entirely different story). But I already recognized that I made some perhaps unwise decisions in my studying, and it wouldn't happen again. I got lucky and got the third highest grade, but it really lit a fire under me. </p>

<p>Well, completely doubt anyone read all that, but thanks for reading some. It felt really good for me to write all this. I'm up way past my bed time, but there is no use in going to be anyway, I wasn't going to sleep. </p>

<p>I really feel so much better now. I just needed to tell someone about this. Strangers are quite OK. </p>

<p>Anyone else ever feel that way?</p>

<p>I just copied and pasted that into Word. </p>

<p>4 pages not double spaced and 1500 words. What a rant.</p>

<p>Yeah, I’m sick and tired of it. Seriously.</p>

<p>I guess to summarize, I’m doing fine without being told to do fine.</p>

<p>Whew, I blew off so much steam.</p>

<p>DIdn’t read it, but I am impressed by the length. gj!</p>

<p>Yeah… many parents do that. I’m sorry you have to go through stuff like that… but some have it worse… imagine being jerked around to overpriced tutors all summer like a kid I know. </p>

<p>Well… parents usually pressure you if you actually have potential. If you were a B student, I don’t think they would even care. </p>

<p>I understand that you want to chill during summer… I did absolutely nothing during the summer between Junior and Senior year… slept in, played Half-Life, etc… at first my parents were cool with it, then they started to panic at the end as they heard their friend’s kids were doing tutoring and prepping for SATs all summer (I’m Korean descent by the way)… Maybe they were right, because my retake score dropped when I took it the third time Senior year… </p>

<p>But balanced fun is great… don’t think you’re going to convince your parents that. I haven’t heard of anyone that did. But just know they’re acting in what they perceive to be their best interests for you and just try to ride out the bad times and wait for college.</p>

<p>ur parents sound like ******s</p>

<p>tl;dr haha</p>

<p>but seriously stop letting your parents rule your life and only do what you have interests in. I don’t see why parents should push their kids when its obvious that the student is motivated themself already. dont do ec’s and ap’s just because, do them because you want to. when your interested in something it gets so much more easier and everything will seem more managable</p>

<p>hey, I feel the same way. except I think it’s more of me doing the pressuring than my parents. You practically read my mind when you said you feel obligated to take the most out of these opprotunities. Surely it seems stupid to slack off when you have so much potential. You’re still a sophomore. relax.</p>

<p>yep i completely feel the same way. I’m a sophomore and have no idea what I want in life. Most of my friends have everything already planned out; their choice career and school. I haven’t an inkling, but I guess that’s ok. So many people change their major in college, and my friends that already have everything planned out, I’m pretty sure it would end up that way for them. </p>

<p>seriously you need to tell your parents to stop pushing as much.
obviously you are a self-motivated person. what are they going to do when you go to college. Call you everyday to make sure you are getting A’s on every single test?
getting a few b/c/d/f’s on a test the whole semester is no big deal. there is always one or two things you haven’t had time to learn/don’t undestand. but as long as the rest are consintently A’s it should pose no problem. i don’t share what i get on every test with my parents. its only the overall grade that matters.</p>

<p>yeah i totally don’t want to do anything over summer either. but feel like i have to or something.</p>

<p>for me, I guess I’m more self-motivated, but it’s more like I fear failing. My mom has always been cool about it if I bring home a B on a progress report card, but if I had like straight C’s or something she would probably freak.</p>

<p>tl;dr you’re tired of working
enjoy flipping burgers</p>

<p>I can finally post again =)</p>

<p>also lol prestige, I vomit every time I hear that word</p>

<p>I think my case is special…</p>

<p>My parents put little to NO pressure on me about my grades. They say “as long as you do your best that’s all we ask for”. I don’t know why I have so much motivation to push myself, taking AP classes and everything. I guess it’s just something I feel I need to do…</p>

<p>Wowowowowow you’re only a sophomre. chill the f out</p>

<p>I’m answering your title question: Anyone else sick of being so pressured to succeed?</p>

<p>Well I don’t feel like I’m being pressured to succeed, though ofcourse I guess I may somewhat pressure myself. Now I may feel somewhat even more pressure due to a large work load of work I have to turn in ( some late work too). So pressuring myself to get all of this work done by today, and some by monday etc… before next Friday so I don’t have horrible grades when this marking period end.</p>

<p>since i was about 4 years old…:0
not to mention the whole ‘i’m only paying for college if you’re going to become a doctor’ bit is getting really f**king old. “what else would u want to be, an ENGLISH major or something???” okay, W.T.F… even if i DID want to be that, it’s MY decision, not yours, @$$hole.
…& aside from the fact that my dad has make me do all of those kid math work-books every summer up until like 3 years ago until i was basically crying all of the time. tyrant dads, awesome.
but concerning some above posters/similar situations-at least most kids in this situation actually DO well [maybe not 100% all the time, but 90% is still an A…]. whereas i have just become a dumb wreck over the years. i mean, when i was forcibly worked when i was younger, at least i was at the top of my class. now i’m that kid who used to be really smart, but now studies her @$$ off for mediocre grades in AP classes. not a good place to be : (
whoo, skimming parts of your story opened up a lot of my own emotions. gl tho :&lt;/p>

<p>trust me i totally know how you feel
my parents are totally riding me just because im a legacy at like all the ivies and i totally dont wanna go to any of them</p>

<p>OP, it’ll get worse if you allow your parents to make your decisions. Just do the ECs you want to do, take the classes you want to take, drop the classes you don’t, and take the responsibility for your choices. Your applications and life will then at least be in your hands and you won’t be a passive actor in your own life.</p>

<p>I’ve been pressured by my half-asian half-mexican dad to be a doctor</p>

<p>and if I’m not a doctor he gets all ****ed</p>

<p>I’m very interested in Medicine, but not necessarly like an MD, I’m more into Public Health and preventive medicine</p>

<p>Live one day at a time, guys, and keep your self-esteem high.
Don’t stress out, tune your parents out, and listen to Weezy.
Works for me.</p>

<p>Live one day at a time, guys, and keep your self-esteem high.
Don’t stress out, tune your parents out, and listen to Weezy.
Works for me.</p>