ask her out?

<p>Hey so there is this girl in my class that i really like. she sits in the back i sit in the front so we cant really talk during class but, a group of us get to class about 20 mins early and sit outside and talk and she is one of them. we chat and have nice conversations. im a "nice guy" pretty good looking, and i really dont know how/just dont to flirt. i've done that "3 second eye contact/smiling" thing and idk if it really did anything. anyway im not sure what i should do to let her know. i cant really talk after the class cuz she takes like 10 mins to leave and wouldnt it be awkward for me to wait for her? if i get the chance should i say something like "you look really pretty today"? or since we're in a group when we talk, how could i get her number? Any help is appreciated. thanks!</p>

<p>Just go for it. Can’t hurt :)</p>

<p>Yes compliment her and ask if she’d want to go out to lunch sometime. Seem interested yet calm</p>

<p>thanks guys, now more specificly, how should i go about getting her number while sitting with other people as i described above? or any suggestions on how to get her alone?
thanks again!</p>

<p>You said she takes like 10 minutes to leave. Pack up your things slowly and as the class empties approach her and say hi. Ask how she thinks lecture was and then ask if she’d like to get together sometime</p>

<p>okay cool, thanks! oh also, you said seem interested yet calm, well i think one of my problems is im too laid back and they dont notice how into them i am, suggestions?</p>

<p>Oh I see. Well make sure you smile. That shows that you’re interested in her.</p>

<p>Maybe you could try asking the professor/TA or whatever a question so that you won’t awkwardly just be sitting there while you wait for her. If you ask her to lunch she should get the message, without it being overbearing. If you just say something along the lines of “hey, so do you wanna grab lunch this weekend? I’ve been wanting to go to/try out _____ and it could be fun.” Or however you would say it but to that general effect.</p>

<p>You already talk to her, right? So if while you’re walking out of class you ask if she wants to go get lunch/dinner/coffee/whatever it isn’t going to be awkward. So do that. It’s best to be direct.</p>

<p>You’ve got very little to lose by asking her out. But, when you do, make sure she understands you’re asking her out on a date and not just some friendly get together sort of thing.</p>

<p>Actually not really. It’s fine to just hang out without having the pressure of it being an ‘omgsuperseriousdate’ (no pun intended on your username.) Just getting lunch on campus is a good way to get to know her and see if you want to keep pursuing things.</p>

<p>Try and avoid the thing where you have a ‘study date’ where you pretend it’s actually a date though. There’s 3 ways that can go (straight to friend zone, she gets creeped out, or something out of the pages of Hustler) and only one is good.</p>

<p>EDIT: That being said, if you do hang out a couple times and really hit it off you’ve got to make some sort of move in pretty short order or she’s going to think you’re not interested.</p>

<p>^ that’s true. I just mentioned that because many guys end up getting friend zoned if they aren’t pretty clear with their intentions from the start.</p>

<p>Go for it! You don’t know until you try. Good luck!</p>

<p>zomgg, I definitely agree. You want to send some signals that you’re interested (or at least don’t consciously try not to), I just didn’t want him to think he needed to do some big thing for a first date. The first few dates are about figuring out if you actually get along with the person or not.</p>

<p>And as with anything, dating is a learned skill. You don’t learn when the right time to make a move is by reading about it on the Internet, you learn by going for it too soon a few times, waiting too long a few times, and finally getting it right. I know 18 year old chuy would be thinking its the end of the world if he screws it up too, but you’ll get it eventually if you keep trying.</p>

<p>great advice! thanks a bunch this is all great to know! however i have another question: she sits next to another guy who is probly 3-5 years older than her but they seem like they get along great and laugh and giggle and stuff, so im not sure if shes interested in him or not since hes quite a bit older. are they just friends? what should i do? should i still ask her out? thanks!</p>

<p>It doesn’t matter. Just go for it.</p>

<p>If she has a boyfriend or isn’t interested, she’ll turn you down. That’s why you have to ask her out in the first place.</p>

<p>one more question: i found her on facebook, should i add her as a friend? or would that be creepy? i found her cuz she told me her name before but wasnt intended for finding her on facebook. what should i do? thanks</p>

<p>Have you thought about changing your seat location? You don’t have assigned seats do you? If you don’t then mix things up by moving next to her. You could always make up some goofy excuse like someone up there has on too much perfume or something. That would at least put you into a close physical proximity. Sometimes all that you need for something to move forward is the chance to stay within a certain distance of someone. When you are close by for long stretches it gives you a chance to exchange info, such as asking what page the professor is on or something. These banal remarks can lead to actual conversations.</p>

<p>Anything that you can do to put yourself in a position of casual closeness will foster a feeling of familiarity. One good idea is to stay after class. Make yourself busy and take just as long as her to leave class. Especially if this is the only time that she is ever alone. That is your prime chance to talk to her right there.</p>

<p>You are worrying too much over the details. Make a friendly date, maybe just to go and get a bite or coffee right after class. If you keep it casual in the beginning it will give you a chance to find out if she already has a boyfriend, and save you the trouble of getting rejected.</p>

<p>good suggestions but the problem is first, no we dont have assigned seating but i have project partner that i sit next to so that would make it difficult to move and now she walks out after class with the other guy. =/
and should i add her on fb or not?
thanks</p>

<p>You should be talking to her about classes and the basic things that you can say when you first meet somebody. Therefore, it will show that you know how to not only get people, but also interact with them and make them interested in you.</p>

<p>Everybody here is telling you to ask her for a small date right away. Don’t do that. It could hurt the relationship between you and her. If you ask for that kind of thing right away, it will creep someone out.</p>

<p>If a girl did the same thing to a guy such as jumping ahead of a friendship, the guy may feel uncomfortable about it as well; not just girls.</p>

<p>Remember Malkaris, these things take time. If you want to get what you want, you have to work your way there. That’s how I look at social life right now as a college student.</p>