<p>^^^ Black Boy! I win!</p>
<p>Also, during AP Bio cat dissections:</p>
<p>Girl: OH MY GOD OH MY GOD
Teacher: What? What?!
Girl: I thought it moved, but I was hitting it with my elbow. Sorry!</p>
<p>And later...</p>
<p>Boy: Um, [teacher]? I think... I think our cat was pregnant.
Teacher: I very much doubt it.
Boy: No, seriously, the ovarian horns are way bigger than in that table's cat.
Teacher: Let me see... Oh yes, Mittens has kittens.</p>
<p>:0</p>
<p>Wow. All I can say is....wow. Poor pregnant cats!</p>
<p>By the way, your name reminded me that one group's cat was so fat, it had fat deposits on its stomach so thick that I remarked that they looked and felt like sushi.</p>
<p>I have a tendency to mention food at inappropriate times.</p>
<p>YOU DISSECTED CATS? EW, man isn't it supposed to be worms... or frogs or something like that?</p>
<p>For all of you that take Spanish:
In my Spanish class, this kid was giving a diario, which is basically a short memorized oral report on a given topic. He started with "Doy una fiesta en mi cama". The entire class started cracking, including the teacher, so he had to practically scream. "Doy una fiesta en mi casa."
Oh, how wonderful vocabulary is.</p>
<p>not-so-bright girl in my business law class - "You put these words in chronological order..."</p>
<p>sigh. so funny.</p>
<p>A Quizbowl quote:</p>
<p>What man, quoting from the Bhagavad-Gita, said "Now I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds"</p>
<p>Ghandi!</p>
<p>Poor guy is now known as Ghandi, destroyer of worlds.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>No way!!!!</p>
<p>Originally Posted by whitelulu
"Isn't poverty a country in Africa?"</p>
<p>That's pretty messed up!</p>
<p>This isn't really a quote but last year an openly gay guy came into my pre-calc class after lunch with a King Size Butterfinger and this girl was making fun of him and how brags about how good he is at different sexual acts and how he was probably lieing. To prove his "prowess" he opens the Butterfinger and shoves the whole thing down his throat then pulls it out whole with all the chocolate gone, all while we were talking about the unit circle. Probably the most ridiculous thing I have ever seen.</p>
<p>^That's just odd. How did he do that???</p>
<p>Today a priest wrote something to the effect of "Jesus loves me, but I'm not his favorite. However, you and I could be one of his Fave Five." We stared at it like "What??"</p>
<p>And the best (not stupid, but funny) from Global was:
Student: Why did Hitler even want a master race?
Teacher: He was freaking crazy! (The class breaks into laughter.) No, really though, that's the only answer.</p>
<p>Some great quotes from the prodigy (violin genius, researching in bio since age 7, skipped a grade, etc.) in my AP Bio class:</p>
<p>-(reading from a sheet) ...has both a mouth and an anus (anus pronounced ah-noose, like Borat)
-What's Cannabis? (when list of plants is on the board)
-What does a caterpillar turn into again?
-(to a substitute teacher yesterday when we were copying notes) So, the <em>bio-babble with no words fewer than five syllables</em>? (awkward silence for a minute because everyone but him realizes he just asked a very advanced bio question to a substitute teacher who was from the Social Studies dept.)</p>
<p>"What's the capital of Iran?"</p>
<p>"Iran City!"</p>
<p>I just remembered another from Global class:
Teacher: If Hitler did not kill the Jews, who would he have killed?
Student 1: Bunnies and puppies!
Student 2: What goes on in your head?!
Teacher: (to student 1) I think I might wait a long time before I call on you again.</p>
<p>girl to teacher - "what is the math's section like in the Spanish SAT II?".</p>
<p>So today my French teacher looks at this kid with his head down.</p>
<p>"Head up! I always freak out when I see kids with their heads down.... Have I told you the diabetic coma story?"</p>
<p>Class: Noooo.....</p>
<p><em>Pause as she collects her thoughts</em></p>
<p>Girl: YOU HAVE CANCER?</p>
<p>bwhahahaha had to be there. The class would not stop laughing, and we kept making cancer jokes the whole class.</p>
<p>really have a good one, thanks for resurrecting this thread ^ :)</p>
<p>we got our last math test of the marking period, and you need at least a 90 to stay in the honors math the next year...so this is an HONORS MATH class</p>
<p>girl next to me: I got an 85 on this test...will I be in honors next year?
me: well, did you get any grades over 90 this trimester? (trying to break it to her gently-she hasn't done well on basically any test)
girl: wait, so to get a 90 average, you need to have grades over 90? Wow i had no idea how that worked!</p>
<p>^ I guess she shouldn't have been in honors math, then...</p>
<p>College West. Thought Teacher: (who has a reputation for being the most liberal teacher at our school and knows it) So beware, I'm feeding you a steady diet of pornography <em>shakes Madam Bovary</em> And maybe if I'm lucky, you'll all turn gay. But that's just for extra credit-
Kid: <em>jumps out of seat</em> How MUCH extra credit!?</p>
<p>^LMAO that's too funny.</p>