<p>Some of the quotes on here are actually really funny.</p>
<p>From debate:
"They've already wanted it hard and long enough, they can't want it any harder and longer!"
"Heroin is just what the sub-Saharan Africans need!"
"The United States Federal government should substantially increase public health assistance to sub-Saharan Africa by taking those markers out of the display case and sending them to African children. Seriously, they're wasing markers!"</p>
<p>And that was at districts!</p>
<p>In health:
"If I could just open up my chest and show you..."
"Do you have a master?"
"I'm a black belt in CPR!"
"You just massage the wound"
"I wonder if you can perform surgery with duct tape? You can do anything with duct tape!"</p>
<p>From bio. (with the most random teacher in the world):
"So, can you have a black baby with white spots?"
Teacher: "ASL? I know where my sex location is...in bed!"
Teacher: "And here are some links to my favorite webcams for you guys"
Teacher: "Sexual, sexual, sexual. Come on guys, say it! Sexual. Why aren't you saying it, [random girl in my class]?"
Teacher: "So, that's why pollon makes you sneeze. Because it's trying to mate with your nose hairs." Girl: "Really?"</p>
<p>I'm sure there are a ton more...some classes are just crazy.</p>
<p>(the point itself was actually credible, but the way it was worded is hilarious): </p>
<p>team 1: ... 300 French people died in (some year) due to heat and because there were no doctors in the hospital because they were on a vacation... therefore, public healthcare is bad!</p>
<p>team 2: we believe that 300 is an exaggeration. first of all, when people feel heat being overbearing, they usually go indoors or find a shade. Only stupid people stand out in the sun until they collapse and gets shipped to the hospital.</p>
<p>This is just hearsay, but from what I've heard about the other Honors World History class:
Teacher: How many states are there?
Student 1: 60?
Student 2:52?
Teacher: Why do you think there are 52?
Student 2: Because isn't Porta rico a state?</p>
<p>In fine arts we were watching jurassic park and the teacher said there was a hand pushing the door open for the dinosaur and a scene with an orange came and a girl was like "I see it!"</p>
<p>This isn't exactly a quote, but whatever.
In Honors Global, all our tests had a geography part where you had to label countries on a blank map. On our Latin American test, we had Central and South America to label. My friend is completely horrible at geography, so she labeled half of Central America Nicaragua and the other half Panama, but of course labeled Nicaragua and Panama incorrectly.</p>
<p>The worst part? She got MEXICO wrong. She labeled it Guatemala.
We're seniors now (this was in 10th grade) and she still hasn't lived it down.</p>
<p>From my Religion class next year:
Teacher: I think God would forgive you if you walked into a wall and stubbed your toe and said, 'Ugh. *****, that hurt.'
The funny thing was that a few weeks before he had broken his toe by walking into a wall.</p>
<p>And in Spanish class, while doing a listening exercise:
Guy: This sounds like salsa music.
Teacher: I learned how to salsa dance.
Guy: Can you do it?
Teacher: Fine. (Starts to give an example, but the Guy takes out his cell phone.) Don't you dare. I will kill you!</p>
<p>One day a bird crashed into the classroom window:
Student: A bird crashed into the window!
Teacher: It happens a lot.
Student: Is it dead?
Teacher: Not yet. Although one time the same thing happened and the bird started to get up, but then this huge crow snatched it up and started eating it.</p>
<p>I can't remember any good ones from class, but here, have a few from Quiz Bowl:</p>
<p>Reader: "What happens in a velodrome?"
Teammate 1: "...Stays in the velodrome?"</p>
<p>(after a bonus consisting of translating useless phrases)
Teammate 2: "Is that Dr. Seuss?"
Teammate 1: "It's French."</p>
<p>Coach: "Okay, guys, for your bonus, give me the proper names of the two bones in your forearm."
(one minute of very confused silence)
Token Asian Teammate: "I want to, like, cut my arm open and see if the names are inscribed on the bones."
Teammate: "It probably just says 'Made in China.'"</p>
<p>okay so today during history we did a skit about the great depression and well i committed suicide. the lecture following it the teacher put up a powerpoint going, "people committed suicide like deepti, but arent walking around as zombies just as she is."</p>
<p>random girl: so where r u from?
me: Korea
randon girl: the good one or the bad one?
me: What?
random girl: are you from the north or the south?
me <em>sarcastic</em>: I'm from the North
random girl: wow...</p>
<p>I like it when Kids who are in Spanish come up to me and practice their Spanish on me. I usually correct them so frequently and annoyingly they stop after a while.
but I will occasionally get some kid who is totally off come up to me as ask
'Cuantos anos tiene?" but with out the 'n' with the ~. and Anos without the 'n' with the ~ means anus.
So I'll always say 'uno' and I'll just start kaughing and ask 'and you'...you can guess the response.
I also had this one friend (more like accommodation) who went the the bad people school called AEP for cutting her self with a knife at school. She is pretty smart but when she came back from her school she would tell us of kids who didn't know what a 'bale of hay' was.</p>
<p>I've also developed several nicknames like:
ChaiMex...<em>cough</em>
Taco with Rice
Chex Mix
and whiel they're not really quotes I find them sort of funny.</p>
<p>Yay for Quiz Bowl Quotes:
I can't remember the exact question, but here goes</p>
<p>Reader: Name the autobiography written by Richard Wright that depicted the troublesome race relations in the South
Opposing Team: It ain't easy being black!</p>