<p>lmao! the quotes on page 16 are hilarious!</p>
<p>
[quote]
"When are we going to learn about the countries on the other side of the map?"
[/quote]
hahhhhahaha!</p>
<p>Oh My Gosh, Are You Serious?</p>
<p>Blood Lady: Oh, where's Europe?
Me: Europe?...
Blood Lady: Yeah, where is it?
Me: Umm.. the other side of the world? It's Europe...
Blood Lady: What's the capital?
Me: Of EUROPE?
Blood Lady: Isn't it the United Kingdom?</p>
<p>How can someone be so ignorant? Holy cow. Not knowing the most basic geography ever, don't you memorize the seven continents in 1st grade or something? That's awful.</p>
<p>100% serious. I almost cried when she said it.</p>
<p>I have to agree that a lot of these quotes probably were in jest, and the joke's on those who reprinted theme here, assuming them to be serious. And we've all heard the semen one before.</p>
<p>There's this girl in my AP Art History and Portland State U World Lit class (its like AP Lit on crack) who has to be the epitome of someone who is insanely book-smart yet must be at least mildly retarded in other areas.</p>
<p>Girl (in APAH): "Wait, why is Jesus's pen1s always covered up in art but they aren't afraid to show other bible guys' pen1ses?"
Teacher: "Uhh... I'm assuming it was probably some unspoken rule, that portraying a fully nude Christ was unorthodox."
Girl: "But you'd think they wanted to show it. Also, why don't you ever see Mary's boobs?"</p>
<p>Sorry, but the Pope kept all of the pornographic art of the holy family in his private apartments. Dumb whore.</p>
<p>(talking about a school that uses a 4.0 GPA scale)
Boy: 3.6? Is that passing?</p>
<p>(talking in economics about the recession & difficulty to get loans):
Teacher: And when Mr. and Mrs. Small town USA can't get loans, they might need to get money from relatives.
Boy, playing Mr. Small town: Hi, uncle, I need to borrow some money to buy a house.
Uncle (white boy): Sure, Uncle Tom will lend you the money!
Try to explain to him why Uncle Tom is not a good name for 10 minutes as the entire class laughs</p>
<p>If anybody knows anything about Spanish:</p>
<p>Teacher: So, when you use conditional tense, you leave it in infinitive.
Extra-stupid third-year: And then you conjugate the noun?</p>
<p>Oh, and my Latin teacher is a complete nut. She's crazy.</p>
<p>Teacher: Like, the difference between lead (led) and lead (leed). Like, the king will lead his people! Or, like, "Oh, my goodness! I really hope my dog doesn't eat lead pipes!"</p>
<p>^Hahahahaha. Lead pipes.</p>
<p>You should have said yes and then "taught" her about Europe.</p>
<p>pre-calc teacher: so if we drop an apple and a feather, which would land on the ground faster?
girl: they would fall at the same time because they have the same mass!
I and two other people around me say "did she just say they an apple and a feather has the same mass?" -__-</p>
<p>gr9 english in california: it was raining hard that day, so the raindrops were panging on the windows
girl: is it snowing?</p>
<p>Friend:"Your glasses are very feminist."
Me:"Yeah, for sure. My glasses fight for all of womankind."</p>
<p>Me: "blahblabblah...so basically the red in this chapter symbolizes happiness."
Friend (at the back of the room): "WAIT! RED DOESN'T SYMBOLIZE P3NIS!!"</p>
<p>From Honors Biology</p>
<p>Teacher: "So, as you can see, evolution has basically led simple organisms to change into more complex ones over time due to environmental conditions and natural selection."
Student: "So will, like, humans one day have wings?"
Teacher: "..."</p>
<p>Every Bio class afterwards went back to wings in some way.</p>
<p>Teacher: "So gene manipulation allows scientists to grow specific types of crops."
Same Student: "So could someone change my genes so I could have wings?"</p>
<p>It was fantastic.</p>
<p>Also... From Spanish IV</p>
<p>Teacher: "So you need to use the infinitive and the conjugated verb to make some obligations."
Student: "What if are obligated to talk about a specific conjugated verb? Would you use a conjugate, infinitive, and conjugate?"
Teacher: "I wish you weren't in my class."
(Class Breaks Out Laughing)
Teacher: "Just kidding."
Other Student: "Behind every 'just kidding' is some truth."
Teacher: "Behind Chuck Norris' beard is another fist."</p>
<p>I love Spanish IV.</p>
<p>Teacher: The average American family has 2.5 children (Or so, I'm guesstimating)
Sophomore: Wait, how do families have half a kid?
Class laughs...
Sophomore: <em>serious</em> What?</p>
<p>Girl in friend's world history AP class:
Teacher: Today we're going to discuss the impact of Islam.
Girl: Hold on. Is Islam a country or a continent?</p>
<p>AP calculus class:
Teacher: What is 8 times 2?
Class:...(silence)...
* I'm not kidding. I think we were all having a long day, so when someone finally answered...
Tired Kid: 0? Oh wait...</p>
<p>My AP Biology teacher enjoys reading entertaining written responses to test questions</p>
<p>QUESTION: How has man benefited from having a of a complete digestive tract (a mouth and anus)?</p>
<p>STUDENT'S ANSWER: We can eat and make love at the same time.</p>
<p>AP BIOLOGY....</p>
<p>Although these are not really quotes, and aren't from class, I just thought I'd add some stupid questions that other high school students have asked me about Alaska. And my answers to them.</p>
<p>Q: Are there really eskimos and igloos made of ice and snow there?
A: Yes, there are eskimos. They are native alaskans, and the very traditional ones occasionally hunt whales and live a subsistence lifestyle. No, there are not igloos made of ice and snow (unless you count the ones that people make for fun). Eskimos and other native alaskan peoples have made igloos of animal skins and other stuff to protect themselves in the worst of storms, but it is not common at all. </p>
<p>Q: Do you snowmachine to places?
A: Nope, not me personally. We actually have these neat metal transporting vehicles called cars that drive on roads. Shocker, isn't it? </p>
<p>Q: Is there really dog sledding?
A: Yes, though people don't use it for transportation but more as a sport. There are two big dog sledding races in Alaska: The Iron Dog, and the Iditarod. </p>
<p>Q: Do you see polar bears a lot?
A: Never, unless I go to the zoo (which is not since 6th grade). Polar bears only live in the northernmost part of Alaska. We do have moose roaming our neighborhoods quite frequently though</p>
<p>Q: What do you really do in Alaska for fun?
A: Umm, we have malls. And movies. And friends. (at least in Anchorage, the only major city in AK with 300,000 people). Kind-of like Michigan, and practically every other place in the world. I guess we ski, camp in tents, and snowmachine more than the average American. </p>
<p>Q: Isn't there like a period where you have no sun for like 3 months?
A: Not in Anchorage (Southcentral Alaska). In December we have 5 hours of sunlight a day, but during the summer we have 20 hours of sunlight a day (hence the nickname "Land of the Midnight Sun"). In the northernmost part of Alaska, during the winter months there is a time where the sun sets and won't rise for less than 2 months. But fortunately, I don't live there.</p>
<p>Q: This January weather [in michigan] must feel warm to you, right?
A: No, it's not. I feel warm and cold just like everyone else. Michigan really isn't much colder than Anchorage though; in fact, it's about the same temperature most of the time. We just get winter 2-5 months longer, and have essentially no springs/falls. Other parts of Alaska get 60 degrees below zero during the winter though-not where I live!</p>
<p>after some random talk about Micronesia..
Student: "Wait...is there a Macronesia?"</p>
<p>In a high school class, a teacher read an article about how Atlantis might actually be near California. The following conversation ensues:</p>
<p>"Wait, I thought California was someday going to break off and fall into the ocean. Wouldn't it land on Atlantis?"
"I heard California was going to become Atlantis..."</p>
<p>After seceral minutes of discussion, they conclude:
"Okay, Atlantis is under California. So one day California is going to break off from America and flip over, and Atlantis will be on top, so California becomes Atlantis."</p>
<p>You can't make this stuff up.</p>