Checking their portal doesn’t mean you will take anything away from them as long as you don’t tell them and let them discover on their own. If you’re like me, there are timelines and time off of work and finances to worry about on school visits. With multiple kids and working full time, I would like to know asap so I can plan my time off for college visits. It also helps to know especially if you have to comfort them too (rejection notification). Also, keep in mind, I know plenty of students that would rather their parents check than not.
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Pomona is making huge concerted efforts in moving away from the commuter school perception. They’ve recently built 2 new huge dorm towers to house freshman and an additional dining hall, bringing the number of freshman dorm buildings to 9, in additional to the suites complex for sophomores and up and the Village across the street. Freshman are required to live on campus.
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Agreed. There are 3 other people in this house who are affected by these decisions. I haven’t told D any of her results, just reminded her to check her portal when I know decisions are out. She’s pretty even-keeled about the entire process so it’s been fine. I encouraged her to apply broadly because of the competitive nature of CS admissions these days, so I have no problem helping her manage some of these communications right now.
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Ditto to checking the portals myself but not telling him the results. Ditto to the wide-ranging applications due to the hyper-competitive nature of CS.
DS got into CPP. Did your daughter apply there as well?
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My son told me his friend got rejected by CPP yesterday. I guess it sent both reject and waitlist on the same day.
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I think we all have to do what works best for our situation. My daughter has not shared her portal information with me and I don’t feel that I need it. She lets me know in a timely manner (same day). I like the old school method… when decisions were sent my snail mail, I would never have opened her mail. So we do it this way and it works for us.
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I definitely think parents should NOT check their kids’ portals and find out decisions before they do. This is taking helicopter parenting to a whole new level 
Let them experience the thrills and disappointments for themselves (I know you aren’t telling them you’ve checked) but kids are very perceptive as it relates to their parents. Our kids have worked hard for years for these moments, and i would never take any of the authenticity of the experience away from them by either tipping them off that you know something (unbeknownst to us parents) or by providing them with a less than 100% authentic reaction to their news. This is their moment, not ours.
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If your D has been “even keeled” about the process why do you think you need to help her manage through the communications? Perhaps consider that you are managing your own anxiety about the process by checking … don’t mean to sound judgmental just providing food for thought. Your D sounds pretty balanced and level headed, we can all take a cue from kids like that through this process 
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No, she just applied to SLO. I’m from Southern California but we live in IL so I recommended SLO to my daughter because it’s such a great school and location. But hardly anyone out here I’ve mentioned it to knows where it is or has even heard of it. We don’t expect an acceptance, but I thought it was worth it for her to give it a shot.
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Ok.
Dorms are dorms.
At the end of the day, Pomona is still a commuter school. Not all incoming students are freshmen and not all freshmen want to live in dorms.
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It depends entirely on the kid and the relationship with the parents. My daughter wanted us to check her portal because she was often at work or at swim practice after school. We had green and gold balloons waiting for her when she got home the evening she was accepted to Cal Poly. She cried tears of joy. It was her #1 school and her brother was there. The whole family was happy. She also wanted my wife and I to be the ones who shared the news with the extended family in text groups. It was just the way we did it. She was involved in every part of the decision making, so nobody felt that the boundaries were uncomfortably crossed.
I’m not saying it’s the correct way to be. I’m just saying that every family has to come to their own understanding according to and specific to those involved.
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100% correct! My 2020 grad is a sophomore at CPP and in the honors college. It’s a great school. But it is a commuter school and has a much different vibe than SLO. Nearly all her friends commute from Riverside and Orange County. With only a few staying in the dorms. Still, she loves the campus and has had a great experience at CPP.
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That is so sweet! I am going to have to remember to do something like that once we know where she is going. She will know before we do… but we will celebrate it. You did good!
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Agree, if the child is totally on board about parents’ checking, obviously that’s cool … i was just suggesting that we should consider why we are checking without them knowing, and pointing out the downside of doing that.
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I have my child’s login information for portals because he is not great about checking email, and wanted us to be able to see if all the financial information was in. He applied ED to a school, and I knew decisions were out, and almost checked. SO glad I didn’t. It was a rejection, and when he logged back in to show me the letter, a new message displayed saying something like “We know you’ve read disappointing news”. If I would have checked, that would have been the first thing he would have seen, eek! That said, I don’t think the state schools have portals like that.
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oh wow… your story reminds me why I never asked for access to her portals. Of the 8 acceptance my daughter has, I did have access to the very first one. It was an early action and I checked it in September, and all this confetti came falling down. I was devastated that I took that away. The best she could get from that portal was to click on “replay confetti.” After that, I’ve never had access, nor have I wanted it. She is a great communicator and I have 100% confidence that I will know the very same day that she gets any decisions. Parenting is so hard… just remembering that story traumatizes me!
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Mu older daughter is in one of those new dorm towers and likes it. They also built a new cafeteria next to those dorms. CCP increased its on campus residents from 1400 to 4000 over the last 10 years. Their plan was to shake the “commuter school” reputation, and they have succeeded.
My daughter is a sophomore in the dorms and will live in the apartment style suites for her Junior year.
I know that SDSU and CP SLO have more on campus housing, but CPP is probably in the top 4 of the 23 CSUs
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Who is going to get post 1000? I’m at 999
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Me…
Today is the day, I can feel it.
But I felt it yesterday too😂
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