<p>Okay this is my first post(yaaayyy) and i just really wanted to get some advice on something thats been bugging me alot lately. any advice would be much appreciated. okay, i found out a couple months ago that one of my best friends from high school(we go to the same college and he's a guy) is gay. now this took me by quite a surprise because i would have never thought him to be gay, i mean he had girlfriends and the whole shabang and he's not really femenine at all. But being his friend i accepted it and im the only person he has ever told and he trust that i wont tell anyone else.</p>
<p>He asked me for help with something that i really dont have an answer to. you see he doesnt want other people to know his business and so he still has to do the casual flirting with the girls and stuff, but the problem is that all the girls he meets always want to come back to his room and have sex with him( oh yeah i forgot he;s quite hot lol) and it makes him uncomfortble and scared and he always has to make up all types of crap inorder to not have them come to his room, he tells them that he has a girlfriend back at home whom he cant cheat on lol. he doesnt know what to do because now the guys in his dorm are starting to look at him funny because he never brings girls over to the room. and now he has become soooo antisocial and just locks himself in the room all day just so he cant come into contact with too many people. he hasnt even been to any of the parties lol, and he seems so sad. what should i tell himtodo?</p>
<p>it might sound funny, but let him know that he should just turn the girl down. he should tell the girls that he's not ready for that yet--which will probably make him look even hotter.</p>
<p>nonetheless, who cares what everyone else thinks? or maybe he could bring girls to his room if his roommate is around. that way, nothing will be expected.</p>
<p>well i already told him that he should just come out and the hell with everybody else, but thats not an option for him it seems. he's really close with his family and he says that something like that would really hurt them and harm his relationships with them.</p>
<p>well sooner or later they will find out. Might as well get it out of the way early so there can be time for healing in his family if they have a problem with his orientation</p>
<p>well thats the thing he doesnt think they will ever accept it so he has decided to never tell them, if thats even possible lol. but ive tried convincing him of this because him mom has to be the nicest lady on earth and i know she would totally understand. but he is totally against it he says he doenst want anything to change between them. i just came from his room and asked him to come to the party with me tonight(which im fashionably late for) but he just wants to sit there and pout and listen to his ipod and just look sad and it kills me. hes like the coolest person ever. he has even stopped talking, like he has seriously lost his personality over this. it frustrates me.</p>
<p>Personally, if I was in the same shoes as your friend, I'd stay IN the closet. Now that may seem as the unorthodox advice, but the freaking guy's in college. Even if he came out of the closet, people would look at him weirder than they already do and even TREAT him weirder!! I think he should stay a phony as long as he can because think about it, who would you be a little more conscious about being around, a guy who you suspect is gay or a guy you know is gay? For the mean time, he should try act like a straight guy until he feels he's good and ready to come out. He shouldn't be pressurized by the society.</p>