<p>I'm at my wits end, and need some words of wisdom before I lose it. I'm not posting this issue in scholarships and financial aid, because I'm not looking to take a loan just for this. But I could really use some like-minded advice in order to make better of this situation, so here goes;</p>
<p>I don't know what to do, every other day my best mate insults and slags me about not being able to do anything. I can go out with them once a week, since they always go to the cinema or pub where drinks are like E6.50 a pop. I try to go out once a week, but occasionally I can't. Because per say, I'm saving every penny I have in order to buy something; ie. a new tv. He himself is in work, and so, makes a considerable amount more than I do to spend during the week. </p>
<p>He's all the time suggesting that I shouldn't be in college, that I could work now and be making money blah blah ****ing blah. For starters, he failed his highschool/leaving cert exams. He didn't have a choice but to work. And it took him over a year, on the dole, in order to find a crappy job that he doesn't like; pushing trollies in the airport, and taking stick. </p>
<p>It certainly feels like all the abuse I'm getting isn't to do with me. If he wants to do something he'll do it without me. (even if it was something I wanted to do) yet I get abuse because he hasn't got anywhere with the ladies lately, or the fact that he's not where he wants his life to be. He 'wants his life to start' and blames me because it isn't going anywhere. It's not my fault, if he had an option somewhere, do you think he'd say 'oh no, sorry, he can't afford to do anything so I'm gonna leave it'? Ha.</p>
<p>I really wish I had the strength to tell him to go **** himself, because it's like he's driving me between 'your our friend if you stop going to college and start making money' and college. It's tough enough being a student, especially when you're already getting stick from your classmates because you left them with their own financial worries. I seem to be driving a wedge between me and damn near everybody...well, we'll save that for later. For now I need to know what to do about my seemingly, best friend.</p>
<p>Stav, it sounds like he is jealous of you. You have a goal (graduate from college), you have a plan (loans and financial aid = college = good career = good life) and you are moving on with your life. He doesn’t seem to have a goal or a plan and he hasn’t moved on. So he’s trying to drag you back to where he is instead of supporting you. </p>
<p>Don’t let that happen. Stick to your education and your conservative spending and make the most of it. You don’t need a “friend” who doesn’t support you, so ditch him and make some new friends at school who are going through the same trials as you and have to watch their money too. You and he are at different phases of your life now.</p>
<p>I must admit though, it gets annoying when people can’t afford to hang out because of money. I refuse to hang out sometimes because of this too though (I have a job so I’m usually alright but eating out is around 7-20 dollars… if i cook its like 1-3 dollars a meal)… and I have alot of food just lying around my apartment that’ll be thrown out/donated in may.</p>
<p>But you should tell him to get out of your face because although I would get annoyed (not with them but their financial situation) I would understand other people’s circumstances.</p>
<p>Like the others say, it sounds like he is just jealous of you. But, don’t ditch him in a hurry, after you say he is your best mate. Tough though things are for you, they must be even tougher for him because he’s got no future whatsoever as of now. I know you guys don’t go into this whole ‘talking things out’ ****. But you can try it for him. Maybe he would pull up and take some efforts to get somewhere.If that happens, 20 years from now you are not even going to remember a trivial jealousy.</p>
<p>If you can flaunt your money without showing off, you will attract positive attention. I do haha, just wearing expensive clothes and letting people know I’m inheritting 4 companies in a non flashy manner gets that point across. I mean when I used to get picked up in a a class in 9th grade, people knew about mah cashmonnieeee</p>
<p>And honestly, if your “friend” was a real friend he wouldn’t pressurize you like this and be such a jealous a-hole-- a real friend would be happy for you and proud of you. But if you still want to keep your friendship: Communication is the answer. You gotta help him get his life together and make him realize how important college is for him.</p>
<p>In general, your friend sounds like a ******.</p>
<p>However, to answer the simple question</p>
<p>college + no money = no life = true</p>
<p>almost anything you want to do, short of kickbacks and house parties, requires money nowadays. this isn’t being superficial, it is being very realistic. if you are a freshman, at first house parties will be appealing, and you may or may not need money to participate in those kind of activities. as the years progress, and people grow, so will their extracurricular interests. you can even have 4 good friends, but the fact is if they keep on inviting you out, and you keep on denying, then after a while, they will stop asking. that is how it works. so not having extra money to spend will blow ass and you will possibly even get fed up with it.</p>
<p>Don’t ever let anyone tell you that your not a good friend because you can’t afford them. There’s plenty of things that you can do with a budget, you just have to be open and explore your options. Stay in college, get a job if possible and save up for the more important things. Be free, enjoy life and don’t stick around people who will constantly make you feel bad because you can’t spend your money every-time you go out.</p>
<p>OP: and that’s your best mate? don’t drop out of college just because he wants to go out and spend all his money. be smart, make friends AT your college. there’s probably a lot more opportunities for you to work part time at a college, especially if you can get a research position or something.</p>
<p>I thought not having money would be an issue when it came to hanging with friends. But it ends up that most of my friends are even poorer than I am. Soo life is okay. Don’t worry about it. Be resourceful, and ditch your “friend” for some friends (who might be in the same monetary situation you are in. Trust me, there are plenty of them!)</p>