<p>I’m the mom of a college student and I’m a professor. One of the most important achievements of the first year student is to go to office hours of professors and seek their input. This lays the groundwork for high quality professor/student relationships down the road. I strongly recommend that your daughter pick the professor who seems the most accessible and friendly and seek that professor out during office hours. Once she realizes that professors enjoy talking with students and want to help, she will feel more able to visit her other professors. There are a few professors at every school who don’t show up for their office hours and who act as if they don’t like being interrupted. But a majority of professors at every school welcome students during office hours. We want to help and enjoy talking with students outside of class. Your daughter can go with specific questions and/or a piece of previous work (essay or test) on which she did not do as well as she had anticipated. Learning success is not a mystery. Good professors know why students are not doing well and we know how to help them. We can work with students to figure out if the issue is study skills or some other area. I often have first-year students make exactly the same kinds of mistakes on their second and third essay exams as on their first. The sooner they get to my office, the sooner I can share with them the systematic things they are doing wrong and redirect them toward success. If your daughter can’t imagine going to a professor on her own, if she knows another student in class she could go with that student. I have two chairs in my office just for the team visit!</p>
<p>One other thing: my daughter cannot drink much or smoke marijuana because of some medical conditions/medications. She can handle sipping a glass of wine, that’s about it.</p>
<p>She would never limit her friends to those who don’t partake, however. I have known her to sit on a couch with the NY Times while friends are playing beer pong. (They joke about doing wine pong for her.) She was never a party person in high school, but does go to certain parties now, after plays or concerts or whatever, and has met a lot of wonderful people. Yes, some with a drink in hand.</p>
<p>Of course many on campuses are bingeing and obnoxious, but there are also many who drink in a civilized manner and have fun, good conversation, and create bonds with others while doing so. I think it is a shame to limit one’s acquaintances and friends on this basis. </p>
<p>I may be in a minority here, but wanted to add it anyway.</p>
<p>My son just graduated in engineering. I may not have the numbers exactly right, but I believe that 25% of the entering class in the engin school transferred out before the beginning of the second year. And another group (can’t remember the percentage) switched during the sophomore year.</p>
<p>It is difficult for HS students to know what engineering entails. For many, it is just not the right path. No shame in that.</p>
<p>This may not be the case with the OP’s daughter, but it is worth thinking about.</p>
<p>Edit: I missed JMC’s last post, so this is now supporting her daughter’s new direction!</p>
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<p>This is a pet peeve of mine, too. Why do people who don’t drink assume that ALL people who do lack self control and dignity? Drinking doesn’t really have to mean drunk. My son doesn’t drink, but doesn’t specifically avoid parties where the upper-classmen do. These things can co-exist.</p>
<p>BTW: I do realize that is off the subject. Sorry!</p>
<p>Hi JMC2010. How is your daughter doing?</p>