<p>That’s great news scrapgirl! Best wishes to all of the young ladies who are rushing. I’m wondering if this is when most schools rush? D’s school has rush in October (at the beginning of their 2nd term) and my school had rush at the beginning of 2nd semester. I can see some benefits to having it early, but I can also see the benefits of letting the freshman settle into the school first. No biggie either way, just idle curiosity.</p>
<p>Fingers are crossed for all the PNMs.</p>
<p>I am glad to hear she is continuing. so many people give up if they don’t get their favorite, but many houses don’t really shine until the smaller parties. Heck, some chapters don’t really shine in formal recruitment. </p>
<p>At a school that uses RFM matching, the number of girls going through does not lessen the number of spots available overall. That is why large schools will also have large pledge classes. The exception is Indiana, which does “bed rush”. Most of the chapters there will pledge only the number of people that are able to move into the house the following fall. so if ABC has 20 beds open due to seniors graduating, they will only pledge that number. It is the only place that I know where you can maximize your options, go to preference round and come up empty handed. It is slowly changing with unhoused sororities, but those involved in Greek life have no desire to change it and make it more inclusive.</p>
<p>Joining in here. I went to an inclusive rush school, made it to pref but didn’t receive a bid. Had a great two years and loved my school. Went to plenty of Greek events when I wanted to, etc. I ended up transferring g schools after two years and accepted a bid from a chapter that was considered one of the lower sororities there (however, I’d known girls there for 2 years and loved them). A year after I graduated, they were the “top” on campus. It changes every few years and I don’t think it matters the on campus ranking - if it means anything, nationally it’s considered one of the “top”. All that matters to me are the great memories and my friends 20+ years later. </p>
<p>I will say this is how rush worked at the two schools I went to - some chapters vote and make cuts after the first party, some invite everyone back. But, at both school s any girl that was invited to pref was included somewhere on the bid list (no cuts could be made after pref as quota was set). However, some girls still didn’t hide just because of how rankings and matches worked out. </p>
<p>Rush is hard on members as well as PNM’s. For our chapter, the toughest night was the night before pref. - narrowing down the list that night. </p>
<p>I will say, I was heartbroken when I didn’t receive a bid that first time, but I quickly recovered. I was someone that really wanted to join but I just went and found something else to join on campus and made friends that way. </p>
<p>Also, the rule at our chapter (and almost every other house I knew of), was that a legacy had to be invited to the 2nd party. The only way I could see that not happening is if a legacy hid her status. Inviting a legacy to a pref party went into different scenarios and usually ended well.</p>
<p>I know every school is different, but I think it is crazy to rush the first week of school. It must be so stressful for those kids. My kid’s school does rush in the spring, after students have had a chance to adjust and make new friends. </p>
<p>Rushing is very stressful. I remember every morning waiting for my kid to call me to let me know which sorority she got invited back. It was always a heart break to know your kid got cut unexpectedly. </p>
<p>Good luck to all.</p>
<p>Thanks for all of the support and I’m going to forward her your stories. In her school, rush is held the week before classes start. Bid day is tomorrow and the first day of class is Monday. But since she is a sophomore, it is an easier process in that sense since she is already acclimated with college life. </p>
<p>I spoke to get again a little while ago and sounded excited for tomorrow so that makes me happy, which is all any parent wants :)</p>
<p>scrapgal how did it go for your D? Mine just started the process, rush orientation is tonight.</p>
<p>DD finished recruitment a week ago at a school with 1765 PNM’s. We’re from CA and what I learned (too late) that recs are almost mandatory at big, Southern schools. She had two but those houses had cut her by pref day. On pref day, when it goes from 7 down to 3 sororities, she only came back with two. She suicided and it worked out. I was concerned that she never mentioned the one house all week (I didn’t want her to “settle”) but so far,so good. She’s very happy and I’m glad she has 200 new people that will be looking out for her so far away from home. She told me some girl was a 4th generation legacy at one house and got cut. It sounded brutal.</p>
<p>Today went well. She got her bid and spent the afternoon with her new sisters and in the house. I reminded her that she would need to adjust and may not click with everyone. She sounds excited about the upcoming events and is going in with a great attitude.</p>
<p>@Snowdog - good luck to you and you daughter!</p>
<p>Glad to hear she got a bid and is having a good time.</p>
<p>SCGmom all of the 26 national NPC sororities are amazing organizations filled with terrific women who do great things for their communities both college students and alumni members. </p>
<p>There is no “top” sorority nationally. It’s sad one would try to rank them or that a grown up would even be concerned with tiers.</p>
<p>Scrapgal panhellenic love to your daughter I hope she has an amazing time with her new sisterhood! If it’s a huge chapter (which it sounds like) she’s sure to find a group of girls to click with.</p>
<p>My daughter got the bid she wanted today too but unfortunately her roommate suicided and it did not work out. I am just sick for her! Not that it is really in the big scheme of things a big deal BUT right now in her 18 year old world it is. She had another friend that suicided and if did work out. I really hope when I talk to my daughter tomorrow that her roomie is ok. I really don’t know her very well and she may be ok about it. I just wish it wouldn’t end this way for anyone.</p>
<p>Why suicide? Does it indicate to the one house that you’re more committed to them than another girl - like EA/ED? Or, would you only do that if you absolutely would not accept a bid from another house?</p>
<p>My daughter “suicided” because she had terrible days at the other house on the list. She didn’t click with anyone. She was counseled that if she didn’t get a bid, houses that didn’t make quota would ‘COB’ continuous open bid in the spring. She decided it was worth the gamble but she got the bid from the other house. I “suicided” and didn’t get a bid 25+ yrs ago so I was able to tell her the pros and cons. Mine worked out well because I became a “Little Sister” to her dad’s fraternity. It all works out in the end :)</p>
<p>I must say that the whole sorority rush process fills me with horror, especially when conducted at the beginning of freshman year. It pushes every button I have. 
This is a matter of my own insecurity, of course. I could never, ever do it.</p>
<p>I <strong>really</strong> think it is better, if schools are going to have fraternities and sororities, to delay rush until spring. Preferably sophomore year. It enables people to get to know each other over a longer period of time.</p>
<p>Amen, Consolation.<br>
A friend on my S did not get any bids freshman year…crushing way to start college…at a school where everyone goes to the big football games with their sororities.<br>
Luckily, she did soph year…and she knows now, that she really doesn’t care for some of the girls in the sororities that she thought she’d really needed to be in initially…</p>
<p>and if my S would have waited to soph year to pledge his frat, I KNOW his gpa would be better—it could hardly get worse than that first semester ;)<br>
Away from home/dorms/college classes/laundry/etc., is a lot for any 18 year old to adjust to. Then throw in some of the (often ridiulous) rituals of pledging…ugh. And the time commitment the frat claimed was underestimated --by a lot.</p>
<p>But I know that the frat and sorority traditions at many schools run deep, and delaying rush is just never going to happen…</p>
<p>I’m glad my daughter didn’t rush until sophomore year. It probably hurt her chances of getting into a sorority she wanted but it was better for her. There are so many things she had to get used to - meals, laundry, additional school pressures. When my son starts college in a few years, I will probably tell him to also wait if he wants to pledge a frat.</p>
<p>Consolation, I have heard many complaints from girls at colleges with second semester rush that they feel like they are actually informally rushing and being judged that whole first semester.</p>
<p>At any school that has 1600-1700 women going through recruitment and 16 chapters, that means that there are well over 150 women in every chapter. ANYBODY will find a niche of sisters they click with in chapters that large. They may not have met those women during the recruitment process, but they will find their niche within any of those chapters. The whole rankings thing is ridiculous.</p>
<p>Rush in the Fall semester can be really challenging for freshman. In my sorority years we had rush in the fall. A week before classes began. The PNM coming through really had limited knowledge of what houses they might be best matched with. This can work in the positive or the negative. </p>
<p>Spring rush, which my D has experienced was nice. Fall semester she made friends with hall mates, classmates, and others in various groups. Then rush came along and new friendships were formed through having pledge sisters. It allowed for a broad base of friendships.</p>
<p>I guess it can seem as though the active members are rushing you all Fall and “judging” you but the reverse is also true. The freshman girls can also see what houses are better matches possibly for themselves. </p>
<p>Pros and cons in both methods.</p>
<p>It is really trying on a mothers heart when our girls go through the process, even if we know the system, all bets are off when it’s your own child!!</p>