All good points, @lindagaf. I just want to mention that in my experience, parents very rarely overestimate, and frequently underestimate, the severity of their child’s depression. I know quite a few parents who were shocked to learn of the severity of their child’s problems, even for a child still at home. Hence my suggestion to proceed with caution. Maybe get a second opinion from another therapist.
IMO this is a huge factor in evaluating study abroad programs, especially for kids who don’t make friends easily.
So long as a group of friends, cliques, don’t dominate the study abroad group, it is very easy to make friends & to socialize. This is especially true for study abroad groups made up of international students from various countries.
It really helps if there are orientation activities, trips, etc. though. My outgoing kid really appreciated those and got to know her cohort very well. She attended a large university in her abroad country and while she certainly met people outside the program (playing sports, in class, etc), it was a real comfort to have a group she knew from going rafting and camping or whatever they did together.
If a kid is going through a depressive episode, it will be hard for her to engage in any fun activities. It’s like saying someone should be able to run a 5K since most people do OK - “It’s great! Social, fresh air, good exercise! It really makes you feel better!” without taking into account that the person has a broken leg.
Thanks again for all of your thoughts. I can see now that this was more of a medical question that is difficult for anyone to answer without knowing my daughter and her situation very well. Hearing stories of kids with similar issues who studied abroad and how they fared helps a lot, although I realize that every kid and situation is different.
My difficulty is what so many of you have expressed - it’s just so hard to know how serious her depression is. The dark times I mentioned in my previous post were a few times spring semester when she was isolated in her dorm room binging Netflix for a day or two. She always managed to get herself out of that, but often it was after a visit home or a visit from us that she felt better. It hasn’t ever involved hospitalization or any real fear for her safety, but the scary thing about mental health issues with young adults (especially private ones like my D) is you just don’t know how serious it is. To me, she seems to be doing better this semester. But, she had some sadness about going back to school recently after being home for fall break and that probably reinforced my concerns and prompted my post.
I so appreciate you all making a recommendation based on your experiences. I’ll talk to her a lot more over the next few days and, if she goes, will absolutely make sure that she has a therapist and medication lined up, as well as plans for what to do if she starts to feel isolated. I’ll also advise her to do more research into how many social events are planned with the study abroad group. I know there is a multiple day orientation and at least one weekend trip as a group, but finding out how many other scheduled events there will be, if any, is a good idea. When we spoke last night, she mentioned some clubs she’s found that she’d like to join at the U in Australia and parks where she’d like to go on runs, etc., so I thought that was a good sign. I’ll also make sure that either my husband or I have our passports updated and can go there as quickly as possible, if needed.
Thanks again for the advice.
Good Luck. From the sounds of what your daughter is telling you she sounds like she is in a good place. She’s planning her trip there. That’s awesome. Maybe confirm with her local therapist again if you need to.
My son did France this summer with many kids from his school and many from another school and country. They were able to plan trips in groups outside of what the school planned. Think of it as 10-15 kids going to Brussels and Amsterdam in his case. He is not Mr social but getting much better and had a great time with his roommates and classmates. He doesn’t really drink but he had a beer or wine when going out. Don’t know if she drinks but she should understand her limit since she is medicated.
The only time he wasn’t really in a group was when everyone wanted to go back and chill and he still wanted to go see another art museum. So he did that by himself. All those trips to the Art Institute in Chicago paid off… Lol…
I think a change of scene can work wonders. My DD was diagnosed with anxiety and depression during her sophomore year. (She had anxiety in HS, but it was manageable). She tried a 3 week Spain program summer after sophomore year, and it didn’t work out. She came home early, found a new therapist, found a medicine that worked, and went to Ireland for second semester junior year. She occasionally skyped with the therapist. It was a fantastic experience for her.
I think a lot of her depression was related to issues with people at her smallish college, but she went on a program for her college, and spent time in Ireland with people from her college - in addition to some new Irish friends and students from other American universities.
We were pretty sure the Spain thing wouldn’t work, because it was right after sophomore year and she was in bad shape. Unfortunately, we didn’t know how she would be feeling until it was sort of too late to cancel - so she decided to give it a try.
Ireland worked out better than we hoped for. We were worried, so my husband and I planned separate trips - turned out not to be necessary. (She also got a visit from a cousin)
My younger daughter also has anxiety, and is planning to go away fall of junior year. She was first thinking about Australia, but is now focused on England. I am really glad she changed her plan. A 6 hour flight to/from Europe (from the East Coast) is really doable. I would have been extra worried if she were in Australia.
In both daughters’ cases, we thought we needed to defer to their choices and there feeling about what they could handle (with input from counselors)
People who don’t have depression can binge on Netflix for a day or two. ?
Making plans is great. I hope she goes an has a wonderful time. You might ask her if she would regret not going. Could well be worse to let fear get the better of her and always wonder “what if.”
My daughter with social anxiety studied abroad this past summer in Morocco. It started out well but quickly went south largely due to a horrible roommate situation. I consider it one of the most stressful times in my life thus far as I myself have anxiety issues. She called upset a lot and it was really just awful for while. She persevered though and says going was one of the best decisions she ever made. I’m just glad it’s over, but I don’t regret her getting the experience even if I was miserable the whole time, pretty much.
My daughter was in a similar situation a few years ago. I posted about it in a post called “Mental Health and Study Abroad,” which I can no longer find. She went to France, not Australia, so the stakes were lower.
The upshot was that we chose to let our daughter go only if she took ownership of everything, from getting a semester’s supply of her medication (she was there a year, but came home for Christmas to refill), and arranging a therapist over there. She had to deal with the insurance company herself and basically demonstrate that she was able to manage her condition without our help. Of course, we had passports and were willing and able to fly over there if necessary.
She had a great time, starting with a fellowship in England the summer before her France program, and then a summer job as a tour guide in a cathedral.
For people with mental health challenges, college is a great time to start learning to manage the condition themselves.
Here’s your thread, @Massmomm.
http://talk.qa.collegeconfidential.com/parents-forum/1743651-mental-health-and-study-abroad-p1.html
Thank you @doschicos !
Australia is nothing like Europe. I think Europeans are more inclusive and the landscape (building, school, cities, towns, even drinking culture) are structured to be close-knitted. An abroad student will feel very welcome. And it’s a chief reason why lot of people love going to Europe and is a popular destination for abroad students.
Australia is the polar opposite in my opinion. It’s a very xenophobic culture, quite superficial (not that there’s anything wrong with that), very cliquish, and more distant. If your kid is going abroad there, chances are she will be most likely just be making friends with other student abroad kids. Sydney and Melbourne are very alluring cities, but just be aware that is in no way as welcoming as other cities.
This is speaking as someone who has encounter experience studying abroad in Australia, and have traveled to both continents there after. I would only recommend Australia to students who are prepared to be independent.
I originally read this and felt that if the medication was working, and she really wants to go, the go for it. But I do think there is no hurry in getting experience traveling abroad. Shorter stints, in the summer for instance, can build a sense of familiarity. I think that during undergrad years, many kids with medical or psych. issues benefit from being close to home, even though I also believe it should be them, not parents, who choose that.
If your daughter really wants to go, make sure it isn’t a “geographic cure,” meaning that she has in her head that everything will improve with a move. She will bring whatever mood issues she has, with her.
If meds are working, that is a big argument for going.
Australia is pretty far away. If she is still used to a lot of family support, I would think about smaller steps or giving her more years to become more independent.
I would be wary of any chance of isolation. Otherwise, it’s kind of a 50/50 dilemma, so my sympathies!
Do you know what her cohort looks like? Aus unis are packed with foreign students even in normal classes. (it is a major money maker for higher ed). Her study abroad group might not be how you imagine it.
https://www.abc.net.au/news/2018-11-25/poor-english-no-jobs-little-support-international-students/10513590
@Sybylla : Great article ! However, should not be a concern for OP’s daughter as she will only be at the University of Melbourne in Australia for one semester (15 weeks) and dealing with these types of issues is an educational experience just as valuable as is classroom work.
Decades ago, when I studied for a semester in Austria (not Australia), I enrolled in a German language course for foreigners at the University of Vienna. We were all beginners in German, but made it work. Very social group ! I was the only American & the only North American in the class. Wonderful experience.
@Publisher It sounds like you’ve had private message conversations with the OP. Fine and good but I’d suggest letting the OP decide what info about her daughter’s program she wants to share more broadly on this thread. 
@doschicos, the user shared more information in another thread.
OKay. Good to know. My apologies.