<p>I am curious how many people don't want to get married and have children. I am only 21, but I can't even begin to think about getting married and/or having children. Most people say that I will have different feelings when I get older, but I don't think I will. After witnessing marriages in my own family for a long time, I have come to the conclusion that it is not right for me. </p>
<p>It seems like some people (based on observations) get married just because, pressure from other people, or even to get other people jealous. A lot of people get married for the wrong reasons (why there is such a high divorce rate).</p>
<p>My parents got married for the wrong reasons (eventhough they will never admit it). My grandparents told me how they felt and why they should have never gotten married. They only knew each other for 9 months before they tied the knot (they were only in their mid twenties and barely finished college). </p>
<p>Their marriage not only affected me (having to witness their continuing arguments), but also my grandparents and other people.</p>
<p>Yeah, neither do I. Not really because of my parents/family or whatnot, just that I have a personality that’s very adverse to being ‘tied-down’.
This may change as I get older, but I doubt it…</p>
<p>I do want to get married when I’m older, but I don’t really want to have children. And I’m female. Usually, many women tend to want children, but not me.</p>
<p>Marriage offers stability so you don’t have to waste time finding new girls all the time. And if you’re going to have the same girlfriend for 10-20 years then just get married. Kids are good since it keeps marriages together.</p>
<p>I’m 21 and I’d like to get married. I almost jumped ship when I was 19 to my ex boyfriend of five years but some complications came up and I wanted to attend school on the west coast. I still keep in touch with him and know that if we were ever to get back together, we’d end up getting married.</p>
<p>Most of my friends are married or were/are engaged. Every single one of my married friends have ended in divorce (except for one which was widowed). </p>
<p>I’m looking for a long term stable relationship. I treat my current boyfriend like my husband already.</p>
<p>I never want to get married or definitely not have kids- for the same reasons as the OP. My parents marriage isnt too great at all and i dnt want that, nor to habe kids to put it thru like me.</p>
<p>So what if you parents’ marriage was not the best? It doesn’t mean your marriage is going to be the same. It is not easy, like is it any romantic relationship, but there is always therapy and different ways to cope. If you don’t want to get marry, it is because you truly don’t want to get married. I bet you want someone to give you a glass of water when you are 80.</p>
<p>That is not the sole reason behind why there is such a high divorce rate. In the time of our grandparents, there were lower rates because people back then dealt with ALL of their problems and rarely got divorces (even if they needed to). Not that this is the correct way, but now it seems like couples get in one major argument and they want a divorce. This much is evident through college relationships. Get in an argument, split up… that’s the trend. Not to mention everyone now seems to want to “see what else is out there.” That one always gives me a good chuckle.</p>
<p>I would assume that some of the people who “stuck it out” in their marriages were also relatively unhappy. Plus, the idea of divorce was relatively stigmatized negatively anyway. It was a sign of the times. That doesn’t make those marriages any better.</p>
<p>i’d rather adopt children than have my own.</p>
<p>there’s such a need in the world for adoption, i kind of think it’s selfish to have your own. what’s in it, besides vanity (desire of having a kid that looks like you).</p>
<p>I want to get married and have kids, i’ve wanted to for a while now (i’m 18). I don’t know why, I’ve always just liked the thought. I’m a bit of a romantic, kind of naive and idealistic. I do like tradition as well.</p>
<p>ilovepeople712 said it’s selfish to have your own kids. I don’t fully agree but I get the point…the world’s so overpopulated, so many kids don’t have parents, and here we are, popping them out left and right. It is a bit selfish and I admire people who adopt children instead of having their own. It is vanity, it’s a pure biological response to want to reproduce and have kids with your spouse, something the 2 of you made together to raise. It is kind of selfish but I think I’ll be doing it…twice. 2 kids, a boy and a girl. but it’s good people are having fewer kids these days. I think any more than 4 is irresponsible considering overpopulation problems and that environmental stuff.</p>
<p>I agree with ilovepeople82. I don’t know if I want marriage/kids. Maybe I will someday, maybe I won’t, but it annoys me when people act like it’s wrong to not want to.</p>
<p>I have no desire to get married. I am, however, planning to adopt. I love kids but hate babies, so adoption is perfect. I can skip the baby part and adopt a toddler instead!</p>
<p>I didn’t say it made marriages better, I said “Not that this is the correct way”. I was simply citing that as a purpose for divorce rates being higher than they used to be. We go from never getting divorced back then, to always getting divorced now. It’d be nice to meet somewhere in the middle.</p>
<p>“We go from never getting divorced back then, to always getting divorced now. It’d be nice to meet somewhere in the middle.”</p>
<p>Exactly. That is what I was saying. So many people get married for the wrong reasons. </p>
<p>If people actually got to know each other before getting married and talk about their beliefs and plans, I think the divorce rate would go down.</p>