Wow, so. Basic rundown. Girlfriend broke up with me, only friends are considering dropping out, I’m failing all my classes, not on academic probation yet, somehow, mid way through 2nd semester of first year, didnt do to well my first semester either, even if I withdraw from a few classes or somehow pass them I still might not get my financial aid next semester. Havent been to class or done homework in weeks. Have no motivation to do anything, and nothing really interests anymore, feel really alond, and due to potentially abusive parents I cant go back home, and I dont have anything else I could realistically do or want to do other than college right now, but I hate it here as well. So yeah, lonely, and really really lost
You can’t tackle all the problems at the same time. You start with one thing at a time and make small progress. And take pride in each small bit you solve. And don’t miss any classes – at least it will keep you distracted from your problems. Make new friends.
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Is the lack of motivation something new for you, or has it happened before in high school?
Does the school have counseling services? What insurance do you have? If this is the first time going through something like this, chances are you’re just in a funk (technical term), and will pull out of it, but if it’s periodic, you might have other underlying issues. Either way, talking it over with a therapist and/or counselor could be helpful.
I think the main thing to do is to really think about what it is that you want. If you can’t think of anything, then your goal should be to work on that. Having goals and desires is healthy, so if you’re lacking that, I would work on figuring out why that is as well.
There’s also some benefit to just going through the motions (fake it until you make it). Go to class. Go through the motions, while trying to figure out what is dragging you down. Note, this can work, but not all the time if you aren’t addressing other underlying causes.
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I agree with @neela1 but also @DadBodThor - you really need to have an outlet to talk to, counseling, etc.
Is there a family friend or relative you can speak to - since you can’t your parents? Or a clergy?
If you were to leave and go to Community College or get a job, is there a relative you can move in with?
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I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way. The transition to college is often harder than expected, and it doesn’t make it easier if you don’t feel that you can lean on your parents for emotional support and are also dealing with a breakup.
I agree with the posters who have suggested speaking with someone. You may or may not be a fan of therapy, but remember that you aren’t making a long-term commitment when you go to your school’s counseling center. They are used to supporting college kids going through situations just like yours, so I really suggest taking advantage. It helps to feel listened to and heard, and they are well-versed in pointing you in the direction of other on campus resources. If you are experiencing depression they can help to assess whether seeing someone in health services is a good plan as well.
I would also suggest crafting an email that you can send to all of your profs letting them know that you’re having a tough time and requesting to meet with them to discuss a plan for getting on track. They want you to succeed, so communicating with them rather than avoiding them will help you negotiate whether they will accept late, possible incompletes as grades vs F’s, etc.
Basically, your two goals should be to get some help and support emotionally, and to try to open the lines of communication academically re: classes/grades so that you can come up with a plan to get through the semester. It’s mid-term most places so it’s not too late!
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Go to class. Staying in your room, feeling lonely, is a recipe for disaster.
Go to the Learning Center to get help and tutoring. They’ll help you with classes, professors, and time management. The services should be free.
Once you start going to the tutors, you’ll start to meet other students and make friends, because they will help you and you will help them.
Don’t give up on yourself.
It will initially be tough, but it will get better.
Good Luck!
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Go to the counseling center at your college…go tomorrow!
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