As you can see on this very thread, there’s similar outcry when they try to just live their lives integrated into the community. “But think of how the other children will feel!!!”
They need places to live either way.
I don’t think the “if you don’t like it” argument applies to either side here. Most of these kids are lucky to be admitted to any of these schools. Its not like they can just switch.
I’m just saying that there are many criteria upon which to base your choice of school. It’s not A10 yet, so you still have time to determine what’s a deal-breaker for you.
Also, anyone who is concerned about Andover should just call the school for the clarification they need. I doubt very much that Andover hasn’t thought this thing through every which way to Sunday. I’m sure the school is not implementing any policy that will put any student into an enforced situation that will make them uncomfortable, regardless of how they identify.
^^ Revisit Exeter (or Andover as it’s doing the same) and ask. Don’t like the answer? Walk away.
You CAN just switch. Apply elsewhere. Go to public. If it must be THAT school, then you need to live by THEIR rules.
For those who are against gender inclusive housing, why? What are you worried about happening that isn’t already happening?What are your fears and concerns based on other than the unknown territory of it all?
I’m at a large conference and haven’t had time for CC. I finally login and see 52 new posts on a gender-inclusive housing thread. My first thought: “@Center!” After skimming through the posts, I find my hypothesis only partially supported. Next time I’ll probably go, “Oh no, @Center and @Korab1!” 
@doschicos There’s no logical reason so arguing further about it would only get the thread banned.
@Korab1 @Center I understand your points about students feeling “uncomfortable” in the dorm if there are students who identify as non binary or LGBTQA+ and having people of different sexes in the same space but the students who would be living in the dorm would all understand this and the students would be the ones who want to and apply to live in that dorm. It isn’t as if some freshman with just be assigned to the dorm or somebody would be put there. People in this dorm would want to be in hat dorm and would feel that need. Think about it this way: How would you feel if you felt uncomfortable in your own living space and could never fully relax without the fear of being marginalized, made fun of, or judged. If an opportunity came along to have a safer living space, wouldn’t you take it?
I feel that the great thing about CC and other forums like this is that people can express their opinions and have positive and productive conversations. I obviously have different beliefs and morals than you both do which is ok because we are entitled to our own beliefs. We have each explained what we think and why and I realize that I’m not going to change either of your minds on the subject. Thank you for listening to my points and Inhipe that you can both try and listen to others as well and try to be more open minded 
I’m not arguing against an all gender house that people opt into. Read the posts, not one person’s complete mid statement of a post.
And please don’t lump me in with center. His expressed views are completely different than mine.
Since we’re on the subject of gender inclusivity, the correct pronoun is “her” (unless she has expressed the wish to be addressed by another one). 
A couple of other things:
• College Confidential is not a debate society. State your case and then move on. Nobody’s opinion will change regardless of how brilliant the argument, so don’t beat a dead horse.
• It is possible, and on this site mandatory, to have a spirited conversation without name-calling and assuming facts not in evidence, Take a deep breath, please.
Not a big fan of the : If You Don’t Like It- Go Somewhere Else - crowd right now. Seriously- how is that a mature or justified response? I especially loved the posts that said: Go To A Religious School and Your Privilege Is Showing!
FYI- Throwing a bunch of pap at someone doesn’t bring anyone around to your side, or further your cause.
If your child is a current member of either community or a recently accepted student, and they’re uncomfortable for ANY reason, I sincerely doubt that a school would say, Go somewhere else- so WHY ARE YOU?. This is on THEM and I’m sure they’ve thought it through down to the last detail. One would hope-right? IDK about you, but I’m hoping that the new dorm setting is a huge success!
A little grace, civility and humor ( on both sides of this issue ) would be refreshing. Some of my best friends are people I don’t agree with on a wide range of topics , but we keep it light and have wonderful and very productive conversations. If someone disagrees with you ( on whatever issue (s) ), it doesn’t give you the right to tie them up with a big red bow and slap a label on them.
People are a little more complex than that and that’s why militant Group Think is so dangerous to young minds, individual creativity and critical thinking.
So, take it easy and agree to disagree like intelligent free-thinking adults.
@skieurope as they say on the State Farm commercial, “Well he’s a guy, so…”
@PhotographerMom you summed up some of my thoughts on this, and probably stated them more nicely than I would have.
Students and families ARE permitted to like certain aspects of a school but not others, choose to attend that school despite the things they don’t agree with, and work to change the things they don’t like. They don’t have to unquestioningly follow wherever they are led. I think the schools would be the first to agree this is the case. Debate and exchange of contrary ideas is what these schools are designed around, not a single viewpoint and an attitude of “go somewhere else if you don’t like it”. Some people in this thread, and in life, preach diversity but try to shout down, mock and marginalize any and every viewpoint that doesn’t agree with their own. That is called hypocrisy.
To everyone else in this thread who condemns anyone who questions what Exeter is doing, turn your argument around - if you don’t like a school that doesn’t permit a kid who identifies as something different to live wherever and with whoever they want, then go to a school that does. If the school your kid goes to now doesn’t allow it, just shut up and take it because you chose to go there, or transfer. How do those arguments sound to you? The words don’t sound any sweeter because they are coming out the left side of your mouth instead of the right.
And for those who choose to assume what someone has argued without actually reading the posts, for the ump-teenth time, my issue is with Exeter allowing students who identify as something other than their biological gender to live with the gender they identify as without the knowledge or consent of the children they are opting to live with. I think all gender housing people opt into is a great idea, and I fully support it.
You claim to want to distinguish yourself from Center’s arguments, but yours are the same.
“Non. Binary. Hilarious.” gives the exact same outcome as “Is it reasonable for a boy who identifies as a girl to expect that he would be entitled to live with and shower with girls regardless of their comfort level?” You both apparently don’t believe trans people are real. “A boy who identifies as a girl” is a girl. Full stop.
And as far as I can tell, the hand-wringing and wailing and gnashing of teeth is coming from uninvolved adults, not the actual students.
The fact that you choose not to hear a difference doesn’t mean there isn’t one, and science disagrees with you.
Yes, this thread contains everyone in the world who holds a view on the topic, so we can definitively state who cares about it based on the opinions stated here.
@Korab1 I’m still not seeing your point about this being a residence where someone could be placed that the others did not consent to? Can you explain why this is not just a house with like-minded folks who all consent? I know it doesn’t say specifically? Why are you thinking it is in a general dorm without the others knowing?
Also, would a single with its own bath be ok in a general dorm? (Trying to gauge which part causes the discomfort, bc some transgender kids may not be comfortable telling the others they are transgender?
The article that was originally posted that started all this described two programs. The first was that kids could request to live with the gender they identify as instead of their biological gender starting this year, and the second program was for the all gender housing starting next year. That is a point that keeps getting lost in this discussion.
In a single gender dorm I think it should be a single biological gender. But I think an all gender dorm or dorms is a great idea. Kids can choose to live there no matter how they identify, or if they just want to support a housing situation where how they identify doesn’t matter. Its not sticking kids in a closet - its providing a housing option where everyone can feel comfortable and supported and safe. Isn’t that the goal?
Wait OK I just wanted to pull it back for a second. I didn’t see any articles about PEA considering gender-inclusive housing. I did find this article which was interesting to read:
But also from the Andover article:
“In keeping with the administration’s efforts to promote inclusivity for gender nonconforming students, applications for the 2016-2017 school year were the first that allowed students to opt to be placed in the dorm of the gender they identify as, regardless of assignment at birth, according to Elliott.”
“allowed students to opt to be placed”.
So nobody is forcing them to do this, because I’m sure if they did there would be lawsuits as Center suggested.
Furthermore - the article doesn’t seem to say anything about shower spaces.