<p>I'm impressed by the terrific ideas - a webcast being my favorite. For my relatives, they'd nearly all rather skip the actual graduation ceremony and come to a family party. Seeing photos or video of just their grandchild or niece/nephew would be enough. I do like the idea of a hired care companion so that parents can focus on their graduating children and not on their own parents' needs for that special day. </p>
<p>Frankly, if my kids were graduating in the spring, I'd be concerned about my own health issues. Since they will graduate in December, only a few hundred students will participate in the ceremony so it won't be very long. I hope to manage well enough that my kids won't even suspect there are problems.</p>
<p>For those of you who regret not taking ailing or elderly relatives to a graduation, please stop beating yourselves up. You made what you believed to be the best decision at that time, and if you had done otherwise things may have gone even worse than you feared.</p>
<p>We talked last fall about what events my husband's parents wanted to attend, knowing that they would have to fly 3000 miles for ANY event (plus take ferries and so on). We settled on the most intimate event (my D's thesis play), then planned around everyone's limitations. That worked pretty well. (We did end up having to stop at a medical clinic on the way to the airport; my MIL mentioned in passing that one ear seemed to be infected! She didn't want to make a fuss... imagine if she'd gotten on the plane without treating it!) </p>
<p>We had an everyone-there Thanksgiving dinner in Boston as well. (Even getting to Boston from their Maine island was a production, because of the ferries. They ended up leaving a day early because wind--which might close the ferries for the day--was forecast.)</p>
<p>Take lots of photos at/immediately after the ceremony, then invite the hordes of extended family and friends to a great after-party. Worked for us several times.</p>
<p>^^^I wish. But in our extended family, everyone lives at great distances. Lots of families live like this today. The college grad is not in our home community where we can entertain with ease.
But many of the above suggestions help for the h.s. grad. We're having one of those, too, this season!
Appreciating all the above posts, gleaning lots of emotional wisdom, too. Many thanks! --OP</p>
<p>Have one mom & one father-in-law-- both 90 +. Neither one in great shape- but what the heck- they're over 90 and still alive.<br>
They are definitely not going to graduation next May. </p>
<p>But what we decided to do- was to take them to visit the grandkids ( sister goes to school near by) in October. This way, they will see their grandkids at college, get to enjoy the campus without the crowds- take advantage of fall foliage in the Finger Lake area and check out some wineries (that was my idea). Luckily, we are driving distance to the school ( 5 hours) so it is a doable option for us.
This seemed alot less stressful than 2 90 year olds at college graduation with 3000 + graduates and their families in a football stadium.
No muss- no fuss-no guilt!!
Idea may not help those graduating now - but might be a thought for those of us whose kids graduate next year.</p>