<p>My first post. CC has been so helpful - I am "working" on my 2nd son and while the college application process is stressful, I know he will by okay at the end of it all. I am writing out of concern for one of his friends.. This boy I will call Alex and he skipped a year, so he is a 16 yr. old senior. His parents, one from mainland China, the other from Taiwan, are divorced, not at all amicably. The boy is brilliant, the valedictorian according to DS, has perfect SAT math scores (don't know about the others), is interested in economics and anything else math related, has taken every useful AP at the school, takes AP English this year, but all other AP courses on-line. When he goes to school. Which is not often. My son and his friends worry about him, and much to DS's credit, he stays in touch w/ the boy via text, and I suspect has the best relationship with him of anyone, has him over to our house, includes him when "Alex" will cooperate and join in. The boy does not join in much, is aloof to many, but according to DS, has a droll, wicked sense of humor and can "relate" to other people when he chooses. The plot thickens: the mother has said all along that he is to go to MIT, that it is the only acceptable school. The father insists that he needs no parental funds, that Dad worked his way through, so son must too. My DS's dream school is U Chicago (we are realistic about his "chances") but Alex wants to follow him there, or anywhere. It was a joke for a while but now I am growing more concerned. Alex told his mother about Chicago, who said it wasn't good enough! She is now saying MIT or the local tech. college, that's it. So we have parents who have no understanding of the US college admittance process. The counseling dept. at school is aware of their absent valedictorian, as are the teachers. I am proud of my son's empathy but also worried about him being more sucked in. We are in the southeast. I can't see this boy going to Ga. Tech, Clemson, NC State, nor can I see him making a go of it on the west coast, even if the funds were available. So I am asking: Do I mind my own business or do I keep the counseling dept. updated about what I know, hoping they are connecting with the parents? And does anyone have any suggestions of schools that my DS could suggest to his friend, to a kid like this? Time is running short. </p>
<p>I would mind my own business.</p>
<p>With no parental approval for any non-MIT school and no parental funding in any case, only schools with full ride merit scholarships will be realistic choices for “Alex”. Just have your son point him to this thread so that he can find a full ride that will allow him to escape the parental restrictions:</p>
<p><a href=“Links to Popular Threads on Scholarships and Lower-Cost Colleges - Financial Aid and Scholarships - College Confidential Forums”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/financial-aid-scholarships/1678964-links-to-popular-threads-on-scholarships-and-lower-cost-colleges.html</a></p>
<p>There are also military options (enlisted military service followed by college, military service academies, ROTC scholarships) if he wants to enter a military career.</p>
<p>It’s nice that OP and her son care about Alex. For the short term, the challenge may be to make sure his absenteeism does not jeopardize hs graduation. </p>
<p>If this kid is brilliant state schools will not hold him back.</p>
<p>I’d have no qualms about telling the school what you know. You are not asking for private information. You are telling them things they need to know to advise a student. As long as you don’t ask for any information from them about this student, tell them what you think will be helpful and let them advise him.</p>
<p>I think it’d be fine for your son to keep his GC up on news of Alex. Or you can. Stick to facts. Then the GCs can carry the ball or drop it. </p>
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<p>Ga. Tech is no academic slouch. </p>
<p>If anything, my main concerns with Ga. Tech would be its strengths are narrowly concentrated in STEM and the level of academic competition is such even topflight students who could succeed at many other top 20 colleges may end up struggling mightily to avoid being weeded out. </p>
<p>Can you see him as a Presidential scholar, Park Scholar, or National Scholar? These are the competitive full ride scholarships at GA tech, NCSU, and Clemson. If this student is that brilliant, then he should apply and he may have a chance at getting one of them. However, many have early deadlines- Oct 15 or Nov 1 ( not certain) so there is little time to apply. These are excellent opportunities, for top notch students, and if he got one, he would be not be dependent on his parents.</p>
<p>Take a look at the automatic and competitive full ride scholarships threads and suggest them to him. Then, the rest is up to him.</p>
<p>Realistically there is not much you can do. I would advise the boy to go see the GC–he can tell his own story without your being in the middle. He may be a HS senior but he is still only 16 and with AP class credit it is possible to go into college as a sophomore and just be too young among his classmates in maturity (just another level of complexity).</p>
<p>He needs to apply to a mix of: true meets needs schools, such as Dartmouth, Harvard, Yale, Williams, Amherst; schools with automatic major scholarships for specific stats, such a U of Alabama and Arizona State; your state flagships.</p>
<p>Do you mind your own business? No, but you don’t attempt to go through the bureaucracy of your HS guidance dept. If you really want to help, give your advice directly to the student. When in doubt, send him to the Parents Forum here. (Do NOT send him to the HS forums, in the name of all that is holy. 
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<p>“True meets needs schools” won’t help if his parents are uncooperative with any non-MIT schools, and/or have high income but no willingness to pay (as divorcees, what money they have has probably been spent on lawyers fighting each other).</p>
<p>One other issue besides the cost is that if he won’t be 18 in time, he may need parental signatures on various non-financial-aid college stuff. So he may not be able to go to any college at all immediately, since he needs to be 18 and have a full merit ride to escape the parental restrictions that make no college both acceptable and affordable (remember that parents have absolute veto power on his college choices otherwise).</p>
<p>There is probably nothing that you can do. The mother will see the light when her son fails to get accepted into MIT (and he won’t, at this point). Maybe she can make her son apply, but she can’t make MIT accept him… “MIT or the local tech college” No way does she mean that. Not deep down. It’s an empty threat, and she probably knows it.</p>
<p>The good news is that, because he skipped a grade, he can take a “gap” year and still not be behind his age group.</p>
<p>This is sad, but it is not a tragedy. People have a way of adjusting to reality when it forces them too. Being rejected by MIT will force the issue. Then the mother will have to make real choices. This will work itself out. Eventually, the youngster will probably figure out that he can get a full ride merit scholarship somewhere and can ignore his parents. You might mention that privately to him.</p>
<p>I agree with @cobrat that Georgia Tech is a fine school. Comparing it to Clemson or NC State is a mistake. GT is far closer to MIT than either of those two. If he is a resident of Georgia, then GT is a fantastic opportunity.</p>
<p>University of Alabama might give this youngster a full ride. And, yes, it is good enough for him (so are Clemson and NC State, for that matter). I don’t know where people have gotten this idea that all geniuses should attend elite private universities. <a href=“http://scholarships.ua.edu/types/out-of-state.html”>http://scholarships.ua.edu/types/out-of-state.html</a></p>
<p>Also, Purdue has rolling admissions. After he gets rejected at MIT and the family gets a bit desperate, he has until next July to apply for admission in the fall. Too late for scholarships but he can get in. Not as good as GT, but still excellent.</p>
<p>Only know positives about GA Tech. Add Caltech into the mix–they accepted my son as a junior. Also, RIT. What is wrong with U Chicago for math? Mudd, so many colleges strong in math. I’d help him apply to many schools, get application fee waivers, and then follow the money trail.</p>
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<p>However, if the parents won’t pay anything, then no college other than one with a full ride merit scholarship (or has no monetary cost, such as a military service academy) will be affordable (unless both parents are low income and cooperative with financial aid forms).</p>
<p>Thanks for the responses. My comment regarding the state schools was not about their quality (Ga. Tech. is pretty cutting edge these days) but more about an introverted, barely 17yr.old freshman mad at his parents being able to cope with a large university.I think there would be money from the mother, who seems to do pretty well financially. The scholarship, rolling admissions, and mom seeing the light suggestions are all helpful and will be relayed to my son.</p>
<p>@relbik
Thanks for the clarification. I doubt that Purdue itself will even be a factor. Without a major scholarship, it might be better to take a “gap” year. Still, who knows, if mom becomes desperate to get her son into a nationally recognized university, and doesn’t want to risk his sitting out a year, Purdue might pan out.</p>
<p>If large schools are a problem, plenty of excellent small colleges have rolling admissions too.</p>
<p>My prediction? The parents will pony up the money when they are faced with reality. These parents are engaged in either wishful thinking or willful manipulation (or one of each).</p>
<p>Not sure how this will turn out. But it makes me think that kids (like mine) who endure their quirky parents have no idea how lucky they are to NOT have wacky parents withholding college funds. </p>
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<p>My impression from observing classmates and listening to aspiring engineering/CS/STEM majors is that Caltech is just as much of a longshot college as MIT. </p>
<p>This was reinforced when I heard how much of a big deal it was that an older cousin succeeded in transferring into Caltech after a year at a Federal Service academy after he found it wasn’t for him. </p>
<p>Your son is an exception among exceptional students. </p>
<p><a href=“or%20has%20no%20monetary%20cost,%20such%20as%20a%20military%20service%20academy”>quote</a>
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<p>There may be an age issue with the military academies as I’m not sure they’d accept 16 year olds even with parental permission. </p>
<p>I disagree with UBCAlumnus’ possible suggestion of ROTC or a service academy. This introverted 16 YO has had no experience to determine if being an officer in the military, leading men and women in potential battle, is in any way, suited for him.</p>
<p>My gosh, OP is hoping just that the dude w/valedictorian grades/stats shows up enough to merit HS graduation! </p>