<p>I went to Bowdoin College last year, was depressed and unhappy socially, applied to transfer to Tufts, BC, Brandeis, BU and got in, Tufts was my first choice so I sent them my deposit but...</p>
<ol>
<li>I visited and wasn't "in love"</li>
<li>I worry that I'm giving up really great academics at Bowdoin</li>
<li>Tufts will cost me $23,000 + /yr including loans, while Bowdoin will cost me $9000 without loans</li>
</ol>
<p>I just don't know what to do and I need to decide today :(</p>
<p>That’s a lot of debt to take on when you are already in a great academic situation. I was much happier with my own college the 2nd year when I was more involved in other various EC’s. Was there something about your living situation (i.e. roommate), or other factors that led to your feeling depressed? Can you choose another housing situation? Like a language house, substance free housing, anything else that could alter your personal experience there? </p>
<p>I am one of those people that believe, “no matter where you go, there you are”. I don’t know what to tell you, but I do believe that people can be happy where ever. It’s all about perception and how you live your life. So could you transfer and be happy at Tufts even though no “love”? Yes! Could you be happy at Bowdoin although your first year wasn’t ideal? Yes. Do some soul searching and make the decision that you feel is made from your truest self and not one made from your head (and don’t factor in others’ thoughts, including mine!). I have one sister that transfered twice! (UCSD to Dartmouth to Kenyon) and another sister that transfered once (Northwestern to UCB), so I get that sometimes it’s an internal pull that you just respond to. But I had little choice about where I was and I made the best of it and loved all 5 years there, lol! What ever you decide, get passionate about where you are and love it no matter what :).</p>
<p>I guess I just felt suffocated by the small size. There wasn’t a very lively social scene, and what there was was a lot of cliqueyness. I felt really isolated in Maine too - I was really craving a bigger school near a city.</p>
<p>Now I’m so torn But it is a lot of debt to take on when I’m already at a really good school…</p>
<p>You are saving $14,000/ year by not going to Tufts. I say you should just endure your unhappy life at Bowdoin and spend that $14,000 on a fantastic summer vacation to re-capitalize on the mental losses. =p</p>
<p>Well, seriously I see no reason for you to go to Tufts.</p>
<p>The thought of going back makes me really sad, I dont know. Im torn between a new beginning, bigger school in a city, and giving up a great financial situation at a place I want to escape from when I’m there</p>
<p>You seem to be searching for someone to say it’s OK to go to Tufts. If you parents can afford Tufts and you don’t go above the Stafford levels for loans then fine, GO. However, if you would have to pay more than that with loans, DO NOT GO. Suck it up and stay with Bowdoin. You may have been depressed because of being in a new environment. Try to make connections with people and clubs.</p>
<p>erin’sdad - that is exactly it, i want to feel like its ok to say yes to tufts.</p>
<p>but it’s true, while my family can afford the first semester at bowdoin and i can take out a stafford loan for second semester, i have only the optionn to take out a $18,600 loan for the year on top of other tufts loans for tufts.</p>
<p>I thought this decision had to be made two days ago.
Here is what I think, as a parent and as one who works with many college age kids. You really don’t know what you want. You are framing this more in terms of what you “think” you don’t like at Bowdoin. Your feelings matter, but you have to separate general confusion or ennui or youth from the reality of needing to change schools.</p>
<p>On another thread and here, you said you don’t love Tufts. Nowhere have you said you need to change for a better program in your major, to be closer to an ill relative, because you suddenly have a rare offer to research for the world’s best prof in your field, you’re getting an amazingly better fin aid package, you have a substantial school-year internship opp in Boston or anything else.</p>
<p>I think you just didn’t click at Bowdoin. Plenty of fresman don’t- it’s a huge transition. You have no idea if you will “click” at Tufts or any other school. </p>
<p>I happen to love Brusnwick and all of coastal Maine- if you don’t, there are still plenty of opps to make the most of your college time- volunteer, get involved, take on more academic depth. Don’t burden yourself financially for a change you are not sure of- and that will involve the same “start-up” you encountered last fall. You can visit Boston. It’s two hours. You can visit Portland. You can look for a summer internship in a bigger city.
I give you permission to return to Bowdoin. And, I wish you the best.</p>
<p>Could this be a case of jumping out of the pan and into the fire? What I mean is that you are unhappy at Bowdoin but you were also not too impressed with Tufts. Who is to say that Tufts will be any better in terms of social life? All colleges, regardless of size, will have their cliques. I would not drop the kind of money you are talking about unless I fell in love with Tufts. </p>
<p>This is the flip side of the chance me threads. Everyone want to go to College X and, by gummy, little can change their preconceived notions. You didn’t have an excellent freshman experience and you want out- and you don’t want to hear other thoughts. Without an idea of where next. What does that say? You still have no good reason to transfer. Thread is getting odder. “I went out and had a blast.” But, you don’t love Tufts. You would not be posting this way if you were sure and it was just a $ question. You admitted you aren’t sure. Life is tough.</p>
<p>Why don’t you just take a year off? I know it is short notice, but get your Dr. to write a note for a medical leave if you have to. Work for a year, think about your longer-term life goals, talk with a therapist about your general ennui - maybe it is an un-diagnosed depression that can be lifted with a bit of formal treatment.</p>
<p>You do not HAVE to be in college anywhere this fall. Let alone Bowdoin or Tufts.</p>
So doctors are just supposed to write a prescription for what the patient wants?? Why is a doctor’s note required at all. The OP can just take a gap year.</p>
But it is a lot of debt to take on when I’m already at a really good school…</p>