<p>He's scared of what his family or others may think of him. His family is very religious, and if he dared tell them the truth they might disown him. I think its better if he comes out and tell them when he's on his own, just as a precaution. But he feels as if its lying and should just say it now to get it off his chest since he feels like its a chip on his shoulder. This stuff is a big deal to some families and people you know? So it shouldn't be taken too lightly. How can I help him come out and tell everyone he is an atheist?</p>
<p>I’d been assuming homosexuality until the last line lol…</p>
<p>Don’t help him come out, help him stay in! Closets are nice and warm and safe. Outside is… <em>shudders</em>.</p>
<p>^^
Yeah, I thought the same…</p>
<p>I think it would probably be better to just keep quiet about it in this case, since the potential gain is relatively small while the potential drawback is quite significant.</p>
<p>But it really is sad that parents might disown their own children over religion of all things. In the United States.</p>
<p>Umm, I understand how he feels completely… I’d start by expressing my skepticism to the most tolerant family member, when an opportunity comes up. Don’t just “drop the bomb”, while people should see this as an opportunity to show care and acceptance, they often don’t, they see it as an opportunity to try and change him or make it into a confrontation. When the time to let it all out comes, make sure he’s firm in his beliefs and make sure he stresses that he’s the exact same person he was before, nothing’s changed.</p>
<p>On the other hand, we lie every day, so him holding this in for a while probably won’t hurt him… If you think severe action will be taken then I’d say to keep this a secret…</p>
<p>You can’t. Either:</p>
<p>A) He tells them now *<strong><em>s up any relationship in the future
B) He tells them when his fully independent (not just financially, emotionally too so long-term girlfriend/wife) and *</em></strong>s up any future relationship
C) He doesn’t and has this ‘fake’ relationship with them </p>
<p>B would be the best option. His a atheist now, nothing wrong about lying (I’m a atheist too and I don’t mean it in a offensive way). The guilt he feels is a by-product of his upbringing, needs to start looking at things from a utilitarian perspective.</p>
<p>Nice ■■■■■ thread</p>
<p>I’m a ■■■■■. I’ve been here for more than a year. I’m no ■■■■■.</p>
<p>I’m a ■■■■■. I’ve been here for longer than Toxic. I’m… yeah, I’m still a ■■■■■ :/</p>
<p>Don’t know if it’s a ■■■■■, but if it’s not: [GLBT</a> National Help Center](<a href=“GLNH.ORG”>GLNH.ORG)</p>
<p>He’s not gay, he’s an atheist…</p>
<p>If I was a ■■■■■ why am I still here. Its always the new people calling others ■■■■■■.</p>
<p>or you could help him stay with his family’s religion, thatd help out.</p>
<p>^ How exactly would he do that (belief isn’t a choice)? Remember the saying:</p>
<p>“Man can do what he wills but he cannot will what he wills.” i.e. he can act like a theist but he can’t choose to be a theist. And if his into philosophy, good luck there’s a reason why over 70% of philosophers are atheist.</p>
<p>And why should he do that? To please them?</p>
<p>… I was hoping this was about LGBT issues, too. I think CC should have more discussion on social topics.</p>
<p>Anyway, I’d advise him to wait. True, his family may be very accepting. But if they insist on “treatment” or “counseling”–it’s incredibly humiliating, confusing, and frankly, a waste of time. Actually, I think this has many parallels to coming out of the (gay) closet. Without getting into the conscious-choice debate, sometimes, you are the only one who knows if you’ve made up your mind, and you’ll just have to stick with that. And when you turn 18, you’re a bit more free to express that without feeling … suppressed? Or pressured. I mean, I’ve read about the ex-gay movement, and I’ve also read about freethinker societies comprised largely of ex-religious-leaders, and right now, your friend may not actually be completely sure that he’s an atheist–subconsciously, he may actually not be completely committed to that. In any case, I don’t know enough about his situation–age, particular religion/denomination, etc.–to really say anything more specific.</p>