Hey guys, could you help grade my essay thx

<p>Prompt: If people worked less, would they be more creative and active during their free time? </p>

<p>The society has always been commended as an industrious society that myriads of people worked hundreds of hours to achieve their dreams and ambitions. In fact, creativity is built through long hors of interaction and communication between people. John D Rockefeller and Thomas Edison would not illustrated that if people period worked less they would no necessarily be more creative and active during their free time
Throughout history, Industrialization played an indelible role in our daily life, and it is through industrialization that made our society progressed. John D Rockefeller, the key industrialist of the period, strived to make oil assessable to the everyday family. And in his career, he never compromised to rest, if things are done. in the beginning of his entrepreneurship, he worked with the chemist twenty hours a day to devise the most effective methods of refining oil. he did not become successful by working less, but he became successful by working more. And in his work, Rockefeller gained priceless innovations that direct him to a successful path.
In addition, Thomas alva Edison, a renowned American scientist and innovator. throughout his career, Edison had always been aspiring to invent new things that might possibly changed the life of human being. In his inventions of incandesdent light, "Edison tried more than 1000 material to find the one material that fit the light bulb" said one of his friend. Here Edison showed that creativity and energy would flourish through means of dedication and hard work. He used his action to achieve his dream.
Although there are thousands of example that can prove the point wrong, the examples of being recognized and wealthy suggested that people will become more creative and active if they work more and dedicate themselves into their work. </p>

<p>Throughout history is a new paragraph, and so does although there are… </p>