<p>contra, I’m so sorry that didn’t work out as you would have liked, but you’ve begun a conversation that might be revisited. I’m not surprised your mother wasn’t receptive; no parent wants to hear about their shortcomings, so they get defensive. But I’m sure your words will stick with her, and I wouldn’t be surprised if there were changes eventually. Don’t feel hopeless, just recognize that these things will take time.</p>
<p>Come back here often. Plenty of empty-nesters who I’m sure would be glad to give you advice! ;)</p>
<p>I’d tell them your girlfriend is pregnant, you’ve got a crack habit, and you think college is rubbish so you’re going drop out and take a job as an trainee tattooist.</p>
<p>Contra,<br>
First off… Hugs and more Hugs to you!
You sound amazingly put together and very mature. Although I cannot imagine being so distant in my kids lives sometimes I just wonder, if I was not as hovering as I usually am, they might have been more independent and mature. I tried very hard quite a few times to distance myself from their daily lives but it never worked. I am happy just the way I am - worrying about them and pretty much being a helicopter parent, maybe I am ‘wired’ that way. I do not know what good it does my kids, but I realized I cannot help myself, I am preoccupied with my kids more for myself than for them. I applaud your parents, in a way, they molded you self-sufficient in many ways. But, yes, please try to rekindle the affection and try to keep in touch. I am glad you mentioned that you had the talk with your mom. Even though she did not respond the way you had hoped, you probably touched a nerve. More likely, you will see a gradual change. Keep hoping and more hugs!</p>