How do I move on with my life and stop caring?

<p>I'm taking advantage of the fact that my Internet is not working at home. I'm now using the campus computer. This means I'll more than likely only use the Internet when it's absolutely necessary. Thank goodness.
The downside is that I'm having more time to think about my life. In retrospect, I have no life and most people would probably think I'm a loser if they got to know me. I'm also afraid that if I leave my past behind, there will always be a reminder by someone or some event about who I was. How do I stop caring and just regard it as a minor glitch? Recently, I have wondered whether I'm just a loser or if I have legitimate clinical problems and I just want to stop thinking about that. I shouldn't care about what the answer is; nor should any of you since most of you are not doctors.
I want to become mindful and live in the present, yet I don't want to do anything careless.
How do I stop caring about arbitrary nonsense like the pecking order?</p>

<p>Oh yeah, how do I make the insults "stupid", "insane" and all their variations not be my berserk button? Berserk</a> Button - Television Tropes & Idioms</p>

<p>We can be of only limited value to you here on CC because this is a very personal issue for you. You need to talk to someone who really knows you – a parent, a close friend, an advisor/counselor, a favorite teacher, a coach, a clergyman. Do you have anyone you feel close to that can give you some objective advice? Or maybe you just need to have a sympathetic ear to listen to you and give you the opportunity to vent.</p>

<p>If you don’t have such a person in your life, go to your school’s counseling department and seek professional guidance.</p>

<p>Good luck! We wish you all the best.</p>

<p>I will try that. I was afraid of burdening people or being a whiner, so I didn’t talk to anyone. Sometimes I’m scared of opening up to people. I had a good conversation with my dad yesterday about learning how to not care about what anyone thinks and improvement with social skills only comes with practice.
When I was watching Dancing With The Stars with my mom which I never do, one of the judges said, “It doesn’t matter how much technique you have if you don’t know how to sell it.” He was referring to dancing, but we both mentioned how that applies to real life too. I don’t know what that has to do with anything, but it sparked something in me for some reason.</p>

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<p>I would define a loser as somebody who doesn’t care. They’ve given up and couldn’t be forced to care about their life.
You seem to care. A lot.
You really shouldn’t consider speaking with a professional psychologist or counselor, if even just for one visit. They might be able to provide some insight to why you’re feeling this way.</p>

<p>I had the same problem when I was younger. I’d spend my entire day surfing the internet, being at the bottom of the social ladder, and not developing any real skills or hobbies. That all changed once I moved away from my home. I discovered that there is a vast life out there to explore and it becomes fairly meaningless and boring to spend all your time on the computer. What helped me is getting away from the cushioning that I had at home and evolving myself in the real world. It’s a lot harder to spend all day online when you’re pressed to pay bills.</p>

<p>Eventually you grow out of the “loser” phase and realize that no one is waiting for you to mess up. People in the real world don’t care what you are doing with your spare time and the sooner you realize this, the more adept you’ll be to trying new activities and getting the most of life. Have you tried getting a job? Joining a club? Or even just picking up a new hobby? These things help you explore life and advance your interest. What your life is isn’t necessarily important. Why question who you?</p>

<p>If you want something bad enough you’ll be able to achieve it with enough self discipline, determination, and will power.</p>

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<p>I joined the school newspaper and psychology club. They are both great and I made some friends. The problem is that I’m drifting away from my goals. I have a job, it’s an Internet job, but still a job…</p>

<p>Today, my psychologist said that I’m only twenty years old and just graduating high school and going to college is enough of an achievement and “doing something with my life.”</p>

<p>“In retrospect, I have no life and most people would probably think I’m a loser if they got to know me.”</p>

<p>And? Who cares? We are all losers</p>

<p>“I’m also afraid that if I leave my past behind, there will always be a reminder by someone or some event about who I was.”</p>

<p>You have a point. Every now and then I’ll bump into someone from my past and it’s a reminder of who I am and the way I was treated by my high school peers just a few years ago. Move to a different city if it’s such a big deal.</p>

<p>“Recently, I have wondered whether I’m just a loser or if I have legitimate clinical problems and I just want to stop thinking about that.”</p>

<p>Didn’t you say were diagnosed with Asperger’s and a bunch of other things?</p>

<p>"Today, my psychologist said that I’m only twenty years old and just graduating high school and going to college is enough of an achievement and “doing something with my life.” "</p>

<p>Don’t you get bored of those platitudes?</p>

<p>"Eventually you grow out of the “loser” phase and realize that no one is waiting for you to mess up. "</p>

<p>Vehicle, that’s a very interesting observation. I always felt that there were people who would have loved to see me mess up. You are right, perhaps they are not waiting for me to mess up, but I still believe that if I mess up, and they learn I messed up, it is possible that they would feel quite pleased.</p>

<p>“People in the real world don’t care what you are doing with your spare time and the sooner you realize this, the more adept you’ll be to trying new activities and getting the most of life.”</p>

<p>Interesting. What’s your official diagnosis? If any?</p>

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<p>I wonder if they were just making excuses for me or saying that I’m a social failure in a roundabout way. Oh well, I’ll just try my hardest to become a different person and hopefully leave all this crap behind me. It’s funny how the psychologist read half the DSM-IV entry to me and said that I only fit half the symptoms. It probably is just a fluke or excuse for me.</p>

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<p>I know. I told him that any idiot can graduate high school and go to college, especially in America. I don’t even think it’s a real achievement, just something you’re supposed to do. I have to do something to make myself feel useful and needed in society though or do something that is really worthy of praise.</p>

<p>“I wonder if they were just making excuses for me or saying that I’m a social failure in a roundabout way. Oh well, I’ll just try my hardest to become a different person and hopefully leave all this crap behind me. It’s funny how the psychologist read half the DSM-IV entry to me and said that I only fit half the symptoms. It probably is just a fluke or excuse for me.”</p>

<p>well, you don’t have to have all the symptoms in order to be diagnosed with a psychological condition. You need to have like 4 out of 9 symptoms, or 6 out of 12 symptoms, etc.</p>

<p>I’m majoring in psychology (only undergrad, but meh). I think it’s unlikely you have any social disorders - you have to consider the fact that you may THINK you have them or WANT to have them as a convenient excuse to give up or rationalize how things turned out as they did. </p>

<p>Social disorders certainly exist - Autism obviously does. But some things are more dubious - for instance ADD and ADHD were almost certainly made up disorders - but I wouldn’t go trumpeting that around, it’ll anger a lot of people. I’m not going to go into it, but the diseases came out a year after “Ritalin” was born and pharm companies needed a disease to go along with it, otherwise why would people buy the drug “to focus” better? Tell them they have a disorder and make them buy meds, that’s this country for you. Anything for dollars here, folks.</p>

<p>Some diseases hardly seem relevant. Like social anxiety disorder, which is pretty vague. Who doesn’t get nervous in some social situations? The “disease” is merely a collection of symptoms that basically say you get anxious frequently in social situations. IOW the symptoms are the disease are the symptoms. Hey, maybe the person gets anxious because they have a negative self-concept, their parents yelled a lot as a child, there was a history of bullying at a young age, the person has negative expectations. It’s not a disease anymore than being sad a funeral is a disease or running out of gas is a disease. Yes, it is a problem that has come up. Labeling something “a disease” is just a convenient way to take away accountability and offer quick-fix drugs.</p>

<p>So let’s just say you don’t have any disease here, at all. If you haven’t been diagnosed with it, then you don’t have it. Even on the remote chance that you do have a disease, are you going to be walking around with that crutch your entire life, or try to improve your situation regardless? It’s irrelevant here.</p>

<p>YOU CAN CHANGE. If you want different results, start changing your behavior. Or option B, attempt to wallow in a pity party and pretend other people are going to care about your long-term life in a meaningful way (everyone cares about their own direction).</p>

<p>The fastest way to acquire social skills is to throw yourself out there, throw caution to the wind, and live on risk and vulnerability. You sound like you might be pretty timid now. You are afraid people are judging what you are saying, what you are doing, yadda yadda. Everyone experiences that to a degree. But you have to go out there and talk to people. Strike up conversations with strangers. Just say anything. What’s the time? Where is X? What is that you’re reading? Hey, cool shoes. TAKE RISKS. Become closer to aquaintances. Exchange numbers, talk to them more often, call them up and invite them over or out to do something. Meet people. Stop walking on eggshells and put yourself out there, there are awkward bumps along the way, but that’s the point — you learn to deal with them. And soon when you become more socially skilled, everything just becomes easier.</p>

<p>^ I’m just going to pretend that I never had any disorders, none of the disorders exist and that everything that happened is my fault (most likely), therefore I can reverse it. I’ll go away for a very long time. So, if anyone wants to ask anything ask soon because I’m leaving this place for several months.
I’m sick of annoying everyone here, so I’ll do all of you a favor and leave until I feel very good about my life.</p>

<p>PMVD, I have diagnosed Bi Polar Depression. I’ve been dealing with it alone for a few years now. I have quite a lot of paranoia (not only social paranoia) when I’m in my manic stages so I’ve simply found ways to cope with these feelings because I refuse to be medicated. My bouts of depression only last a few days so I’m very fortunate. </p>

<p>TA3021, I’d be rather unnerved if my psychologist told me that it was a big accomplishment to have graduated high school and attended college by the age of twenty. Everyone and their mother goes to college these days.</p>

<p>Achievement comes from personal satisfaction. I have the same mentality. I need to be doing something worthy of praise by means of social benefit or unique innovation. The unfortunate part about this overachiever is that nothing is “good enough.”</p>

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<p>Exactly. This just proves that I’ve really done nothing special with my life. I hope I really do something to be proud of someday. I even told him that exact quote and he didn’t respond.
First step: Get off the Internet unless it is for something important like schoolwork.</p>

<p>Thank goodness my computer broke and my dad listened when I told him not to fix it.</p>

<p>You possibly could stop making the same thread over and over again on CC to have people give you the same advice over and over. That might be a good place to start.</p>

<p>Then you need to see a professional to talk to about your difficulties socializing as well as your low self-esteem. I’m pretty sure this has been everyone’s advice since you started making these threads, why haven’t you done it yet? Your college health center probably offers therapists.</p>

<p>^ I’m going to print out the threads and show them to him. I don’t care if he hates me for it. For some reason my issues are not getting across to him. Oh well…**** happens. I’ll just wait until this thread dies and get the hell out of this site for a very, very long time.</p>

<p>peter_parker, this reply is for you:</p>

<p>Even though your last message on this thread was not addressed to me, I felt so offended when I read it that I have decided to respond to it almost as if it had been addressed to me.</p>

<p>"I’m majoring in psychology (only undergrad, but meh). I think it’s unlikely you have any social disorders - you have to consider the fact that you may THINK you have them or WANT to have them as a convenient excuse to give up or rationalize how things turned out as they did. "</p>

<p>Even if TA thinks she has “social disorders” or wants to have them, it doesn’t mean that she doesn’t have them. You remind me of a psychologist I saw one time: very hesitant to diagnose me with anything other than depression. I knew I had something else, something deeper than depression, I just didn’t know what, and thanks to that **** I spent many years feeling distrustful, almost paranoid, of psychologists. I eventually mustered up the courage to see a specialist and was diagnosed with a personality disorder along with other conditions. Denying that mental problems exist is not going to make the patient think that he is normal and all of a sudden be happy and functional. That approach might work with a patient with an IQ of 90, but what if the patient is not daft? Is the anxiety that you will cause the patient by denying what the patient knows is the truth, justified? I want you to think long and hard about that question because many of you “psychologists” and psychologist-wannabes clearly don’t understand human psychology as well as they think they do.</p>

<p>“Social disorders certainly exist - Autism obviously does.”</p>

<p>You acknowledge that social disorders and autism exist and yet you brush off TA by telling her it’s unlikely that she has a social disorder, after ALL the desperate pleas for help she has made on this forum. Is it unlikely that a random person walking down the street has a social disorder? Yeah. In TA’s case, however, it is obvious that she has something. In fact, she mentioned in another thread that she was diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome (a form of autism) along with other disorders.</p>

<p>“But some things are more dubious - for instance ADD and ADHD were almost certainly made up disorders - but I wouldn’t go trumpeting that around, it’ll anger a lot of people. I’m not going to go into it, but the diseases came out a year after “Ritalin” was born and pharm companies needed a disease to go along with it, otherwise why would people buy the drug “to focus” better? Tell them they have a disorder and make them buy meds, that’s this country for you. Anything for dollars here, folks.”</p>

<p>There are no medications for Autism or Asperger’s Syndrome.</p>

<p>“Some diseases hardly seem relevant. Like social anxiety disorder, which is pretty vague. Who doesn’t get nervous in some social situations? The “disease” is merely a collection of symptoms that basically say you get anxious frequently in social situations. IOW the symptoms are the disease are the symptoms. Hey, maybe the person gets anxious because they have a negative self-concept, their parents yelled a lot as a child, there was a history of bullying at a young age, the person has negative expectations. It’s not a disease anymore than being sad a funeral is a disease or running out of gas is a disease. Yes, it is a problem that has come up. Labeling something “a disease” is just a convenient way to take away accountability and offer quick-fix drugs.”</p>

<p>Whether people get nervous in social situations or not is not the point. When a person gets so nervous in the most simple social situations to the point that they can’t function, that’s when it is said that the person has social anxiety. Feeling emotions is not the same as having a mental illness. The problem is when those emotions are so pervasive and so exaggerated that the person can’t function.</p>

<p>“So let’s just say you don’t have any disease here, at all. If you haven’t been diagnosed with it, then you don’t have it.”</p>

<p>That’s your cure for all the diseases in the world right there: stop diagnosing them!</p>

<p>“Even on the remote chance that you do have a disease, are you going to be walking around with that crutch your entire life, or try to improve your situation regardless? It’s irrelevant here.”</p>

<p>Her having a disease or a condition is not irrelevant at all. If she knows what she has, perhaps she will obtain adequate help, the type of help that might actually work with a person who has what she has.</p>

<p>“YOU CAN CHANGE. If you want different results, start changing your behavior.”</p>

<p>It’s not so simple when your brain is literally not wired like that of most people. Also, emotional problems and other social handicaps such as inability to express ideas coherently or read social cues will make it almost impossible for TA to learn to socialize like normal people do.</p>

<p>“Or option B, attempt to wallow in a pity party and pretend other people are going to care about your long-term life in a meaningful way (everyone cares about their own direction).”</p>

<p>Or option C, TA needs to figure out exactly what she has so she can get adequate help. Ignoring that she has a problem won’t make it go away.</p>

<p>“The fastest way to acquire social skills is to throw yourself out there, throw caution to the wind, and live on risk and vulnerability.”</p>

<p>False in this case. How do you know that TA has the mental capacity to learn social skills by means of observation and trial and error? That approach might work with neurotypical people, but TA has Asperger’s Syndrome. Your advice simply shows that A you haven’t been reading TA’s messages or B you lack basic knowledge of Asperger’s Syndrome.</p>

<p>“You sound like you might be pretty timid now. You are afraid people are judging what you are saying, what you are doing, yadda yadda. Everyone experiences that to a degree. But you have to go out there and talk to people.”</p>

<p>What if she can’t come up with anything to say? What if the only thing she is good at talking about is some random, obscure subject? Is it socially appropriate to approach strangers and lecture them on obscure subjects they probably don’t care about?</p>

<p>"Strike up conversations with strangers. Just say anything. What’s the time? Where is X? What is that you’re reading? Hey, cool shoes. "</p>

<p>That’s the opener. And then how does she sustain the conversation? What does she need to say to keep it going? Where is the script she needs to follow?</p>

<p>“TAKE RISKS.”</p>

<p>TA needs to take into account the amount of emotional damage she would suffer if she takes a risk and fails. In my opinion, a life of trauma is not something people should gamble with.</p>

<p>“Become closer to aquaintances. Exchange numbers, talk to them more often, call them up and invite them over or out to do something.”</p>

<p>They are going to tell her that they are busy, or that they have plans, etc. The few times that they will go out with her (I’m being optimistic here) it will be solely out of pity.</p>

<p>"Meet people. Stop walking on eggshells and put yourself out there, there are awkward bumps along the way, but that’s the point — you learn to deal with them. And soon when you become more socially skilled, everything just becomes easier. "</p>

<p>People with Asperger’s Syndrome and other social disabilities don’t learn social skills the way “normal” people do.</p>

<p>Off topic, but that’s a mighty large post.</p>

<p>I’m sick of this ********.
I will become a completely different person by next year or bust.
I’ll have so many friends and events to go to that I wouldn’t know what to do with them all. That will be my worst problem.
I will have a life most would envy.
I will get this down to a science.
End of story.</p>

<p>^ it’s definitely possible, you can do it</p>