Wow…you kind of got me when you said you checked out THEIR pay stubs and bank statements… not exactly my definition of “the perfect kid.”
My own reasons for wanting my kids no more than ballpark 4 hours away is first, that it’s expensive to pay for airfare for Thanksgiving and Christmas and Spring Break and Summer. And if something should happen to my mom (who is in good health, but still 84) then I know my kids would want to be there for her. I want to give them the freedom to get home if and when they want to.
Of course, I don’t have to pull those excuses “out of my butthole” (ouch… the adult in me hates typing those words, even in quotes.) ; I’m an adult and will spend the money I make as I see fit.
When you say you “fear your parents’ wrath”-- do you mean you’re afraid of physical violence or of financial independence? It’s hard to have it both ways… generally the one who pick up the tab gets to call the shots.
I wouldn’t suggest playing the “dad makes more money than mom, so he has more say” card-- it’s bound to make you sound like a child who doesn’t understand how marriage works. We don’t pro-rate our expenses. So when I was out on maternity leave, it didn’t mean that I wasn’t allowed to go out and buy baby formula without permission. Likewise, when my husband was hospitalized a few years ago and missed work, he wasn’t put on an allowance.
At the end of the day, you’re 19 and can do as you choose. If you really want to go to a school your parents won’t finance, hit the internet and start looking at loans.
The best of luck to you as you figure all this out.