<p>Hey, I was also in a situation similar to yours when I first started at my college. I’m always here to talk if you need it, and I can completely relate to what you’re feeling. I hated it here when I first started, although for reasons opposite yours; I’m used to a small country town with cornfields and being in the city is what I thought I wanted but I’ve learned I am not suited for city life, haha. I was also just generally feeling overwhelmed and inadequate here, but I’ve come to relax and realize I don’t need a 4.0 (especially not here!)
I think I’m going to stay, but I know what you’re feeling so just wanted to let you know I’m here if you need anyone to talk to. For me, it was really more a problem of missing my family, since we’re all very close. </p>
<p>I think some people don’t understand that, for some kids who have spent their entire lives in an urban environment, r being within half an hour of a major city like Chicago (many suburbs here are approach the urban-ness and density of the city…), it would be difficult to suddenly end up in Urbana-Champaign, i.e., “the cornfields”, I don’t care how many other kids are there…
We also live in a Chicago suburb. My daughter, 16 now, is starting to look at colleges. She took a field trip with her math team to UIUC. She came back and made me promise her I wouldn’t make her go to school there! smh. She said the campus was nice, and the town looked okay, but “nothing is there”. Well, of course, something is there! But to a kid like her, it seems like “nothing”.<br>
My daughter is also the kind of kid that just LOVES cities and being in them. She loves Chicago and Minneapolis… She doesn’t like, or appreciate small towns. She just doesn’t. </p>
<p>About a hundred years ago, I attended Indiana University in Bloomington IN. I loved it. Bloomington is a great little town and I loved IU. That being said, I grew up in a small city in southern Indiana. My own kid would probably not love it so much.<br>
And, I also loved it within a week of arriving there. </p>
<p>UIUC is a very good school, one of the best public universities in the nation, I think. Factor in very cheap tuition for in-state residents and it’s a hard option to pass up. But you can still get in-state tuition at UIC (Chicago campus). </p>
<p>OP sounds like he would really be happier at UIC, DePaul, or Loyola.<br>
I also highly recommend you NOT commute though, and try to live on campus, or in an apartment with a roommate. It is a completely different experience, even at the same school.<br>
I am familiar with the area around UIC, my husband works in the south Loop and we sometimes go to the area around the old Maxwell Street area/Little Italy - which I believe they now call University Village - to eat or have drinks. It is an up and coming area, with lots and lots to do. Lots of young people milling about… 25 years ago, the area was very slummy, with CHA tenements nearby - but those are all gone, not a trace seems to remain. The neighborhood has done a total 180.<br>
As you might know, UIC has dorms and apartments, but those will likely be filled spring semester. One thing you could do is look for a sublet for spring; then, get into student housing at UIC for next Fall. </p>
<p>If you are in Business, though, I’ve heard that DePaul is very good for Business-related majors. </p>
<p>Best of luck to you in your decision! </p>
<p>Ok, I just saw your latest post, OP. If you can make it through the year at UIUC - and of course, you can! 
- it may be much easier and less stressful to transfer next fall, at the beginning of a new academic year. Take the rest of the year to think about what you really want to do, where you really want to be. Go take a walk around UIC, DEPaul, Loyola campus and see how you like it, see if you can imagine yourself being there.<br>
Best of luck! </p>
<p>While it may seem like everyone is Greek, in reality only 23% of students there are Greek, meaning 77% are not Greek like you. Among those who are not Greek there are bound to be non-drinkers – certainly in some of the religious groups you will find some people who don’t drink. I went to a public university four years and never once set foot in a fraternity or sorority house or had a drink or even showed up at a drinking party, and the university was in the middle of nowhere. I made the best of it by joining some student groups and getting involved in the community, writing for publications, etc. Keep trying to find your people while you are there. It sounds to me like your challenge is mostly missing home, including your own basement workout, your dog, your car, etc. Ask your parents to give you a car, so you at least have that. And set up Skype so you can actually see your parents and your dog on the Internet. If it looks like they are going to insist on you staying at UI, then check out the co-op programs, and sign up to go work in a big city somewhere else every other semester. I co-oped in Houston, and that got me out of the small town. </p>
<p>Berikson, I feel for you and can sense that you’re miserable; if you’re interested in PMing me feel free. I’m also unhappy at the current school I’m attending, but for different reasons (it’s a small, highly intense insular school that likes to party hard/work hard and is very homogeneous in student body mentalities). </p>
<p>Anyway, I know that it probably feels overwhelming, suffocating, depressing, frustrating, and/or miserable, but realize that having to stay there won’t change. The only thing that can change (cliche-sounding, I know, but true) is the way you view the situation, your perspective of it. If being stuck in the “middle of nowhere” is sucky, try joking and laughing with people about it, and maybe it’ll get just a little bit better. Try journaling as a way to outlet your feelings in a safe way? Actually, self-help stuff can help a lot, too. You’ve got to find a way to make yourself stable, so keep reaching out to the academic support systems, counseling systems, etc. </p>
<p>Although it may seem like “nothing” is in the town, you should still try to find <em>something</em> around the town to make you happy. Seriously, even just one thing. I know you’ll be pining for the city life but the point is that it will make it more tolerable for you while you’re stuck there, which is an inevitable reality! You might as well TRY to have fun, right?! I know it’s hard. Try getting your roommate to go somewhere with you – maybe a gym in town that’s a <em>little</em> better than the one at your school that’s shoddy, and there’s got to be <em>one</em> good restaurant in town, I would think! Try it out. What else do you like? Art, music, other hobbies? Bookstores, cafes anywhere at all, accessible in some way? Bus rides to nowhere and a book to read and music to listen to? Try finding ways to do those things, and with people that you like (or alone works, too – depends on your personality). It can really help. </p>
<p>People have suggested a lot about meeting others. Hopefully you’re trying some of that – I know you said you didn’t want to because you’re really miserable there. It is hard, I’m sure. But realize that making an effort will help your situation even a little bit, and you need all the momentum you can to push through the year. You can’t change the location, man, but you can change the company you keep – well, at least in a public school like yours. There are 45,000 people there; be thankful you’re not going to a tiny little private college where most of the student body acts exactly the same, and you have hardly any people that don’t party left to choose from! Anyway, making even two or three good friends during this year that you’re stuck there is going to help.</p>
<p>Finally, think to the end. Start planning your transfer applications for the winter break, and tell your parents that you’ll do the best you can for the year, but then you feel like you have just GOT to transfer-- and I think you’ve got to tell your dad this, too. If you phrase it that way and you really are going to grimly suck it up and dedicate yourself to academics in the spring, I can’t imagine why he wouldn’t be understanding of that. It could be worse; they could not let you transfer at all/force you to stop going to school altogether, since it is their money. But start writing your transfer essays maybe during extra free time (if you have a lot, I don’t know how intense academics are there or how your social life is helping with this, but basically you’ve got to have at least an hour or two a week to spare for this). Carefully research each college you’re considering – and make plans to go visit them when you get back on winter break. I would suggest probably visiting twice if you can, since first impressions can be misleading and you can look at things with rose-colored glasses.</p>
<p>Use that to fuel your drive to the end. Pour yourself into academics and the crappy gym you have, the roommate you have, the other few friends you can make there also interested in health/fitness/insert other activity here, and ignore the party scene. Just focus on you, and just try to make it through. </p>
<p>I wish you luck. </p>
I’m just now reading your story a year later, and it is so nice to know that I’m not the only one who felt like this! So I wanted to say thank you for that. I started my freshman year of college last year at SDSU in August. Initially, I was super excited about it. But it didn’t take long for me to realize that I made a huge mistake going there. Everything revolves around Greek life there, and if you’re a girl and you’re not in a sorority, you’re basically a complete nobody. These days you can’t even get into parties if you don’t belong to a house. I refuse to join one, though. That’s just not me, and I’m not going to alter my ideals and my personality just so that I can feel like I “fit in.” Also, the classes were a lot harder than I expected, and I’ve always been a good student - so doing poorly in some of them really took a toll on my confidence. I felt trapped and miserable in the dorms. I missed my home and my family. Basically, I went through everything you did. It was such a depressing experience. I’m not sure what you ended up doing, but I hope you’re doing well and you’re happy wherever you are now. I’m sticking out one more fall semester at state, then transferring to a JC.
@berikson what did you decide on doing?
He has another thread, click on his name. He transferred, and is now unhappy at his new school, sort of wonders if he should have transferred after all.
@stucklikeyou He decided to transfer to DePaul. His story continues here: http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/college-life/1809386-i-fear-ive-made-a-big-mistake.html#latest