<p>agree that these days distance is not as drastic as it was when we went to college. back then we could only call once a week or so, and only when the rates were cheaper.</p>
<p>now we can connect with kids as many times a day as we want with text, cellphone, skype etc.</p>
<p>and if they are away, it doesn’t matter if it is an hour away or 10 - 20 hours away. our kid who is one hour away has a job and we saw her less total time during the year than we saw our kid who is at alabama 10 hours away.</p>
<p>Such a good thread. I appreciate all of the shared stories. I’m still a teary mess. I haven’t had the “complete breakdown ugly cry” that a friend experienced at the grocery store when she realized that she’d only need 4 chicken breasts instead of 5 but I know it’s going to happen. I walked in DD’s room last night and walked out a sloppy mess. She’s had the time of her life with sorority rush and the first couple of fun weeks under her belt but is now getting terribly homesick. I’m hoping its a good thing that we’re 10 hours away and I can’t run right over and get her? It’s hard when she’s happy but I’m not sure how I’m going to get through these phone calls while she’s not. Where’s the Parenting Manual when you need one?</p>
<p>sewsheknits - it’s ok. mine went through a rough patch. a LONG rough patch, but we all made it through just fine and now she has just one year left!!! time sure flies!</p>
<p>does your daughter call when she is not happy. mine tended to withdraw when she was not happy, so i would just wait until she felt like talking. let the kids take the lead on when/how much to call. they don’t need us bugging them all the time.</p>
<p>This is so normal! My son was so homesick, insecure, and lonely the first month of school last year, even though he was pledging a fraternity, got along we’ll with his roommates, and had a girl who he liked. When kids leave home for the first time, especially when they have a close knit family, they will experience a sense of sadness. It will pass.
Fast forward to this year-he sent a text that said he’s so much happier this year. </p>
<p>As far as momma missing her baby, well, I’m not sure I will ever be completely over it, and that’s all right. It gives me an excuse to fly to Bama!</p>
<p>We are also in a state where there are in state schools are further than UA. A good friend had to get up at 5:00am this morning to drive 7 hours (and that is speeding) to move her oldest in for his 3rd year of an ISS. Another big ISS is only 4 hours away but with the horrible, and I mean HORRIBLE traffic between here and there it can take over 10, it has for Thanksgiving break for many kids every year. Traffic from here to UA is a straight shot and not bad at all. 9 hours and 10 depending on stops we chose to make. I can be on a plane and be there in less than 2 hours. LOVE IT! </p>
<p>I have not had to time to become a sloppy mess yet. Too busy with so many other things that there has been no time to even realize my baby is not here all the time. Guess that is why my friends always said it starts their senior year as you see them less and less.</p>
<p>Thanks so much, y’all! I keep telling myself that it’ll all work out. She doesn’t call when she’s upset but I can tell through all of the “it’s OK” comments that it really isn’t. Thankfully, she made it over to the Rec Center earlier today and sounds better. I guess some of the club sports were there recruiting so she met new people and is in a better frame of mind. </p>
<p>I’m staying out of her room for awhile. ;)</p>
<p>TxNewCollegeMom, I’m glad you said that the 4 hour drive to one of the ISS can be as long as 10. Makes me feel better that I wasn’t able to convince her to choose a school closer to home. We just moved to TX so I’m still learning.</p>
<p>SewSheKnits, the drive between Austin and Dallas can be a beating! The UT kids from Dallas coming home at Thanksgiving, forever! It’s not uncommon for it to take that long. There’s a reason all those “Texas Exits” exist off 35</p>
<p>Good to know…I think I’ll stay home at Thanksgiving. We live just off of 35W. I wonder if it’s the same for the drive from Tuscaloosa to Atlanta that weekend?</p>
<p>Thankful for the quick flight to Birmingham!</p>
<p>Got my first “I’m homesick” text today. She misses her friends and wishes she could come home for the weekend. </p>
<p>She’s been there two weeks and the whirl wind of rush and school starting has finally faded. </p>
<p>I am now actually glad we are 11 hours away! Call it tough love, but I still thinks it’s better for her to learn that this too shall pass instead of running home every time she feels lonely.</p>
<p>I saw many friends posting yesterday that their homesick kid had come home for the weekend. After only 1 week!!! Those kids had not even spent a weekend alone at their school. Then were getting up early today and driving back. I too am glad mine is not that close. She needs to figure some things out on her own. And coming home every weekend they will never make good friends or experience a weekend away from home at their new home.</p>
<p>Driving nonstop, it would take over 38 hours to get from my home in Washington state to the UA campus, assuming that the roads aren’t closed for avalanche control or construction. As malanai mentioned, taking a redeye flight means I can be on campus by the late morning. It’s much easier than driving 6-7 hours to an in-state school. </p>
<p>UA did a study and found out that the students most likely not to return for their second year are those who come from nearby states and are very close to their high school friends who chose to attend the local university. Students from far away generally have a high retention rate as they have more independent and self sufficient mannerisms. </p>
<p>In my experience, a care package mailed at 5:00 pm PST would be in my hands by 10:00 am CST two days later, so baked goods were still very fresh.</p>
<p>Going to college far from home also means that one can experience a different culture while sharing ones own culture and discovering that there are many more similarities than differences.</p>
<p>Alright so my DW and I aren’t feeling that much better since leaving our son at the amazing University of Alabama. Our DS on the other hand is having the time of his life, loving his new lifestyle, new friends, great classes and teachers, etc. Someone suggested we buy a puppy to fill the void our DS has left in our home. We are having a very hard time finding a 6’4", brown haired, blue eyed puppy with a smile that lights up our world like the NYC skyline AND that plays Lacrosse, loves the NY Jets, Rangers, Yankees, the Zac Brown band and drives a Jeep Wrangler with convertible top down. Maybe Marmaduke is having puppies.</p>
<p>However, your nest is empty. Don’t get a dog that may tie you down and keep you from going on a whim to see your DS or anywhere else you would desire to jet off to. Unless it is small and can travel easily, like under the seat of an airplane
We have 2 furbabies, love them dearly! One, she has spent the last 9 years of her life sleeping every single night in the bed with one 5’2" brown eyed brunette that is no longer living in Texas. She is missing her “mommy” something fierce. She is small enough to travel. The other, bless his heart, he loves us but way too shy for strangers. Hard to leave him and he is NOT a travel doggie. DD2, that is a freshman in HS, mentioned getting herself a dog. Uh, NO! Cause in 4 years she will be off to college and leave us with another. Being her devious self she laughed and said that is the plan. To tie is down with 3 dogs to keep us from being able to go visit her all the time. stinker…</p>
<p>But that is so sweet<br>
Okay, get a puppy ;)</p>
<p>Our DS1 is attending school here in NY while working for a major corporation. He leaves early in the morn and doesn’t arrive back home until very late. At least I still get the “wake me up at…” text from him before he comes home and am relieved when the garage door opens rattling us awake. Might only get to speak with him for a few minutes, but hey I’ll take what I can get.</p>
<p>NYBama, there are so many organizations that need volunteers - parents like you - to work with children if you have spare time. Try using [VolunteerMatch</a> - Where Volunteering Begins](<a href=“http://www.volunteermatch.org/]VolunteerMatch”>http://www.volunteermatch.org/) to find opportunities in your area.</p>
<p>I finally sat down and read through all these posts…I started it a while back, but it started the tears a flowing. But, I am truly glad I made it through this time. I too dropped off a very introverted DS, I have am worried that he won’t “fly” as many have put it…it was good to read that others have said that their DS grew out of their shells. </p>
<p>I was really looking forward to his coming home for Thanksgiving, but have learned that the band has practiced scheduled during the break…I am really worried about him being alone during the holiday.</p>
<p>Do not worry! With Thanksgiving being only 1 week before finals this year, a TON of students will not be making that journey home, esp OOS students. He will find loads of company to hang with, I’m sure, esp being in band group.</p>
</p>
We live just off of 35W. I wonder if it’s the same for the drive from Tuscaloosa to Atlanta that weekend?</p>