I am guessing this is an out of town gf, and the issue isn’t just having the room for “activities”, he probably wants her to sleep there, too, since she is from out of town. We’ve had some other threads on this. Quite a few students want to have their opposite gender significant other stay in the room overnight with the roommate still there. My opinion is that a roommate gets full veto power on (1) getting sexiled overnight, and (2) whether someone of the opposite gender gets to stay in the room overnight. Vacate for a few hours? Sure, ideally with a little notice. But I think the roommate needs to find some women for his gf to crash with after a couple hours in the room alone, not assume his roommate is going to let them have the room overnight. Or as discussed above, get a room of their own.
The only real issue I have with the roommate is that he went and found another place for OP to stay-that is overstepping, in my opinion.
It’s one thing to ask and negotiate as peers, it’s entirely another to pre-arrange and shuffle the OP off like he’s a little kid that the parents want out of the house when they’re going to pound town.
The roomie has screwed up the power balance, and OP’s going to have to be a little tough to get it back.
You (your parents) have paid for this room. It is your room. You have the right to sleep their every night.
Have a talk with him sometime when the girl friend is not there. Tell him you realize this doesn’t work for you and you are not going to be kicked out of your own room. “Sorry, this is my room too and I intend to sleep here. What I can do is tell you when I won’t be around so you can have private time. I will text you when I am coming back.”
If you have any issues with this, talk to your RA.
@temple2020 I hope your roommate situation was sorted out. I thought back on it today when my daughter reported that HER roommate had taken a boyfriend and he’s been in their room 24/7. Last night her roommate kicked her out and she spent the night in the dorm lounge. So, at least you know you are not alone in suffering. My D talked to her roommate and the counselor, but I warned her that now that she’s been ‘nice’ and let the roommate take over the dorm room basically, that the roommate now views it as her single and it’ll probably get ‘icy’ in the room as she asserts her right to be there. But to try to take in stride and remember the potential for hilarious stories later in life.