<p>I graduate high school this year and have noticed that when discussing college my younger sister and brother (im oldest) tend to go silent. At my high school there are kids who only speak to their older, college-aged siblings during breaks and others who are in constant touch with their siblings. Unfortunately, my personality leans more towards the only speaking during breaks and visits and my family is aware of that (my mother fears that if i go too far away for college i would not come home during breaks.) Is that form of communication normal or bad? The 3 of us are not any more close than any other group of siblings. What did you or your kid did to stay in touch with family while away at college?</p>
<p>One college S is adored by his younger sisters. They skype or text a lot. Other S isn’t as close to sibs. H and I text/call him about twice a week, but he has little contact with sibs. Whatever you’re comfortable with. How hard is it to send a text? Let them know you still care (a little, at least.) Photos are nice, so your sibs can see what your place is like.</p>
<p>My sons rarely contact each other while at school, unless they “need” something. But they were not particularly close the last couple of years of HS. (Kind of sad bc they were very close for most of their lives). Do what your comfortable with, but they would probably appreciate knowing they will at least hear from you… Insert how often. For example, maybe a family Skype session each Sunday evening or something like that. </p>
<p>My kids are 8 years apart, and were pretty close considering the age difference.
Youngest was too sad to talk to her sister at college, although we did go visit at least once if not more a year, and she came home for all breaks.
Oldest did not get a cell phone until senior year of college, it’s possible that they would have communicated by texting if she had.</p>
<p>My kids are very different but they are pretty close. Still, they generally didn’t’ communicate a lot when one was away at school – just an occasional facebook or text. When we are all home I hear them chatting away and laughing together. Also I make it a point to plan some family things over breaks which guarantee that we get some time together.</p>
<p>When I was first at college, I was about 45 minutes from home. Never went there, never talked to them (local phone call, no charge) At Thanksgiving, I went home for Thursday and right back to school on Friday morning.</p>
<p>Then my parents moved 2000 miles away. My mother called every Saturday morning, and it cost her a bundle. Then she called my sister who lived in the town Mom had moved from. Then my sister called me to compare notes.</p>
<p>My kids are now away. I talk or text them, or receive contact from them, more now than when they lived at home. I don’t think it is possible to predict how it is going to go. You might find yourself texting the younger kids all the time. I don’t think my kids are in contact all that much, but they are very different and both very busy.</p>
<p>My kids interaction is largely through silly pictures over text. Not much conversation but it’s playful and S always perks up when he gets something from her. We’ve done a couple family skype sessions too. I encourage you to make an effort to do “something” but it doesn’t have to be formal or happen daily.</p>
<p>Don’t laugh – I got a nephew to set up a family fantasy football league so we’d all have something in common that he enjoyed and I could call him about as the family “expert.”</p>
<p>My two boys text each other regularly – one is in his first year at law school in state, the other is a freshman out of state about 11 hours away. I hear from the law school student a little more since he is about 90 minutes away, and I try to go and see him once a month. As for the other son, my visits will be limited to Parents Weekend and maybe an away track and field meet within five or six hours of our home.</p>
<p>Do try to keep in touch with your siblings, even if it is just a couple of times a week. My younger son hits his brother up for scheduling advice, class suggestions or just saying what he will be doing on weekends.</p>
<p>My two girls are 5 years apart. They don’t keep in touch all the time, but they contact each other when in stress - boyfriend/friend problem, class selection, getting annoyed at parents.</p>
<p>D is a freshman at a small LAC one state away, about 120 miles from home. S is a freshman in high school. I am pleasantly surprised at how often they text each other, a few times of week. D calls once a week so we can hear her voice.</p>
<p>My boys are 3.5 years apart. They get along and have a few interests in common (sci fi - though not necessarily the same sci fi - and board games), but otherwise they are very different. One is the quintessential computer nerd, the other is much more of a people person. We talked to the older one on the phone once a week (if he answered it), the younger one we used Skype. Both emailed or texted us from time to time with questions, the younger one much more than the older one. </p>
<p>I wish they were closer to each other, but I know from my family that things change. We all went to the same college and I overlapped with the older of my two younger brothers and still hardly ever saw him except on vacation. I went through a period where I saw a lot of my older younger brother’s family a lot. Then a period where they were annoying me and I got to know the younger younger brother better. Currently I see a bit more of the older one again because our Mom lives with him.</p>
<p>My twins call one another probably 2-3 times a week to say hello and check in with the other. Of course, their frequency is up to them, but I think it’s nice that they have a good relationship. </p>
<p>My two older children are away at school and I have a 12 year old at home. One of them, messages me throughout the day all day. Just little texts, funny pictures, snap chats, etc. I feel like I’m right there with her and she knows she’s always just a click away from mom if she needs me. Often, we cut eachother off, “GTG, class” from her or, “student here” from me. My son isn’t in such constant contact but he just hates typing on a phone. He has a bad habit of calling me when I text him. 
Both of them text their little brother and eachother.</p>
<p>So this family is HEAVILY dependent on our cell phones for keeping in contact. </p>
<p>My two older kids are 10 and 15 years older than their sister. They obviously left home longer before she will. At times they’ve lived very far away, other times they’ve lived nearby. Before social media was big, they would call me and ask to talk to their little sister. How often depended on what they were doing and where they were. Now they call, text and message each other. The two older ones live nearby, but one sees his sister much more often than the other. They’re still close, though.</p>
<p>OP, I can’t imagine not even sending a quick “hello” text to a younger sibling once in awhile and only speaking to them on breaks. That sounds like you’re not close at ALL. You don’t say how old your siblings are, but as a parent, I can tell you that younger siblings look up to the older ones. To them it’s a cool adventure that you’re going to college, and if they’re close to you in age are likely very curious about how your experiences will compare to theirs. My older kids certainly got annoyed with their little sister at times but it’s nice now to see them playing board games when they come visit, or when one of them takes her to a movie or roller skating, etc. If you talk to your siblings only a few times a year except for summer,s how can you hope to stay close in any way?</p>
<p>My son and my daughter are 3 years apart in age. When they were young, they had almost nothing in common. No common friends, hobbies, interests. Very different personalities. Then when my son was a junior in college, spending a year abroad, we visited him with our daughter, who was a senior in high school. Suddenly they discovered they had the same taste in music, similar outlook on life – even though their talents were different. They hung out together, i.e., went out while we, the 'rents stayed up wondering when we’d see them again. Back home, he finished college and continued to live in Chicago. She went to college in the east. But somewhat amazingly, he became friends with some of her college friends who moved to Chicago. And some years later (about 5 years ago) the two kids found themselves living in the same city again: New York. While they have completely different lives and occupations, they are friends still, and include one another in events. They now have a decent brother-sister relationship that we never saw when they were young.</p>