<p>This really is a great thread. I have been out of town today at one of my daughter's events and am now reading all these posts that are great. I have some thoughts to add but they are not all related but just responding to different things that came up on this thread today.</p>
<p>One...I really admire those DADS who are doing this whole deal with their kids. My husband is really into our daughters, interested and attends all their events, etc. But I was the one who was the support person through the college admissions process and audition process. He was aware of it all but I was in the trenches. All the visits and auditions were with me too. He took care of the financial aid applications :D. So, I do think it is cool to meet some of you dads who are doing the whole deal with your kids, rather than the mom. I'm wondering if you guys have the disagreements about outfits to wear and everything??? J/k. </p>
<p>Two...I couldn't agree more with MusThCC and had touched on that a bit in my earlier post. I don't think this thought pertains to anyone on this thread but my general feeling is that if you have to really push a kid in this college admissions process a lot, then it is time to sit back and examine the whole deal and have a heart to heart about what it is that they want and what they need to do to get there because if that passion and drive is NOT there, then I have to question if this is the right direction to go into. A BFA program requires a very strong work ethic. They need to know what these programs are like and if they are truly cut out for them (and I am NOT talking about talent). Often, in some programs, you hear of kids who dropped out of the programs voluntarily or else were kids who others were not surprised were cut (I'm not talking of all those who are cut but more the ones you hear others say, "it did not come as a surprise"). For some kids, until they have been immersed in the intensity required, they find out that it is not for them. There is a certain work ethic, motivation, drive, and passion that is needed. If someone has to MAKE you do it, and if this is happening just in the admissions process, then you gotta decide if this is the right path. I worked with a student where the parents, as well as myself, had to push and practically force the kid to do the application stuff, etc. and my feeling is if this is going to be a struggle to get a kid to do this, then this kid just is not cut out to pursue a BFA. There must be an internal motivation. If you want it badly, you'll WANT to do what it takes to get there. If you don't want to do the work, then reexamine the goals and maybe they are not the right path. I'm not talking about a little nudge here or there....like "did you get that application done? It needs be done by the end of the week." but am talking more about making the student do it who is not motivated to do so. If the little nudge here or there turns into pushing, then I have to seriously question if the student is cut out to do a BFA program. If someone has to make them do it, then they don't want it badly enough and will have trouble when no parent will be present. </p>
<p>Three....about the audition prep stuff....I think there are moments that a teen can drive ya crazy and there were some here too (though it did not have to do with her wanting to do the work or anything like that). For instance, I think my D spent WAY too much time DECIDING which songs to do for her auditions. After a few months of going back and forth, finding more or different songs (which is of course a good thing in itself), I kept saying that this is not about trying to find such a unique song that you spend months picking and barely any time working on whatever the chosen material will be! Later she admitted she did spend too much time concerned with WHAT songs to sing and that she concentrated too much on trying to find something different (again, that idea had to come to her herself, not from me, cause I know nothing!). There have been times when my D has had some kind of audition (NOT talking college ones now) where she picks a song to do at the last minute and I might think that is nuts. I've seen her do this for some important things or last minute things that have arisen. She just knows a lot of songs, will go in and sing something she has not worked on and be successful. She has won some competition sorts of things or gotten into some things where she just went in and sang something she decided that day or the day before sort of thing, and been quite successful with it. My husband will say that though you might think it is nutty, she knows herself and what she can do and seems to find success with it, so who are we to say? It works for her. She seems to know what she is doing. Each person has their own style, their own process, their own method of prep. They know their own selves.</p>
<p>Susan</p>