<p>Only two people in my current town have ever attended BS and people were accepting of it because one of them was moving to an all Japanese BS which is what her older sister did and therefore it didn’t come as a shock to anyone. The other’s father is on the board of trustees of an acronym school and therefore she was expected to attend (especially since her older sister attended as well). However, upon mentioning I was applying to BS I was met with open hostility and negativity, and my teachers were reluctant to fill out my recs and my guidance counselor purposefully sent his in late.</p>
<p>bump for NEW boarding school parents. Congratulations and a hearty welcome to the fold! :D</p>
<p>Now you, too, can practice suppressing eye-rolls and can rehearse cheeky comebacks for when your horrified friends and associates say to you: I could never “send my child away”</p>
<p>@GMT: I’ve always wanted to respond to that comment with, “Well, you should! I’ve met your kid and, believe me, you need the breather.”</p>
<p>Oh, ChoatieMom, you’re much nicer than I would be! I’d simply say that some of us can trust our kids . . .</p>
<p>Or: “I’ve met your kid and believe me, if he were mine, I’d have sent him away years ago!”</p>
<p>In our case, the question usually pertains to how far away the school is . . . and I do have a snappy retort to that one, but I dare not repeat it here!</p>
<p>Imagine, if you will, what the reaction was when we sent our eldest away to a school across the ocean–no hints on which one 
. </p>
<p>I just said that he wanted to be Francis Urqhart of PBS’s House of Cards (who is always seen wearing the Eton tie…).</p>
<p>I experienced my first dose of this a few months ago when I confided in a long time close friend that D was applying to BS. An all out lecture ensued. I defended our decision to let her apply but the subject is pretty off limits now, as I am fine without her judgment. We have been friends much too long to let the disagreement affect our relationship. And, we tend to disagree often enough ;)</p>
<p>I have found my friends who do not have children to be the most supportive and have been Ds cheerleaders through the process. I notice these childless adults seem to view my D as more mature and recognize her strengths more openly than other parents.</p>
<p>My observation probably supports the theory that some parents will take our decision as an attack on their parenting…</p>
<p>Im done disclosing anything to anyone though, the 4 people who know will remain who knows unless they dig it out of me or, threaten to call the authorities that my daughter is missing ;)</p>
<p>Just got a ‘new’ one from my dentist: He said that he had gone to a terrible high school, had goofed off all through it, and yet here he was today, a successful dentist. His conclusion: “I don’t think high school really matters. So I wouldn’t waste the money.” </p>
<p>I haven’t come up with the perfect cheeky comeback to this yet…it would be something along the lines of “it matters if you actually care about education as an end in itself, and not just as a means to an end”. Still working on it. For next time.</p>
<p>Ruralmama: it matters more than ever! Ask him if he’s heard of globalization or if he thinks the job market is the same as it was back then. Ugh. The nerve!!</p>
<p>We have a new one: wondering if kid2 will be passed over for a local city job in favor of local kids, simply because he is a “rich prep school kid.” No one here knows about FA. Even if they did they’d find rationalizations…</p>
<p>We have the added challenge of being in an area with very strong public schools and fantastic college prep/day school options. Add to that a culture of NOT going away to school, and it becomes difficult to explain our choice. </p>
<p>I know I don’t owe any explanation, but some people are genuinely curious…not judgemental. I find it hard to explain - succinctly - our choice. I usually default to it being “her choice” and saying we left it up to our daughter… sounds kinda lame when I say it out loud! LOL</p>
<p>I got a doozy the other night…</p>
<p>“You know, when you send girls off to boarding school, they come back horrible. Just horrible- and MEAN!”</p>
<p>My reply " oh yes, well that would be HORRIBLE" change subject.</p>
<p>Since I’ve mentioned that my daughter wanted boarding school, I’ve gotten a few “Really!!!” With a look of concern and a Why do you want to send her away?" from the nosey class mom… I responded…I’m not sending her away, I won’t be selfish and have her attend a school that I want…I want her to love school not be miserable…so her opinion is important to us in this process. (I said this because this particular parent calls all of the shots). </p>
<p>My daughter’s classmate said to her…wow you must have done something really bad. My daughter responded…are you kidding? I said boarding school not a convent! 
I loved that comeback. Lol!</p>
<p>^I still remember when we received a similar comment, when I told an acquaintance that our S was in BS, and she replied “What did he do wrong?”. A good friend of mine was also with us and she responded on my behalf – “he’s there because he’s so good!” :)</p>
<p>I got a FB message from a neighbor the last week asking if DC was home as she thought she saw her. I replied that she had been home since the first of March for spring break. Neighbor responds “wow that’s a long time”, I respond that longer breaks are typical at BS. Next message from her was: That’s because kids need to be HOME!.</p>
<p>I didn’t reply to that one.</p>
<p>I would have had to respond. Something along the lines of MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS. Why is it that everyone thinks they need to tell other families what is best for them… Aaaargh. So annoying.</p>
<p>Momof7thgrader that was so incredibly rude…what a numb-nut.</p>
<p>I guess I don’t often stop to consider what other people think because if they delve into this too deep they find out that both DW & I attended BS, have good relationships with our parents and siblings, and have pretty decent jobs and leadership skills. So I think behind our back it’s more “oh that’s just what THEY do…” So the good news is, if your grandkids take
the same route, the whole neurosis really loses steam. My kids still have good friends at home, and I did, too, even in the Stone Age prior to Facebook and cell phones. I attended my “old” school’s graduation party; OK, it may have been a little awkward with some, but not enough to stop me from going to congratulate my longtime friends.</p>
<p>@ RuralMama - How about “Gee, maybe if you had gone to a decent HS you would be an MD today rather than a dentist”</p>
<p>(For the record, I don’t ACTUALLY think dentistry is an inferior career choice in any way, just a snarky comeback.)</p>
<p>Thanks! It would actually be hard for me to actually verbalize a snarky comeback, but they sure are fun to think about!</p>
<p>Wow… New bizarre low in BS criticism. Well meaning, deeply religious co-worker warned me that DS could turn out gay living a dorm full of only boys. </p>
<p>I just smiled and thanked her for her concern.</p>
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<p>You’re a better person than I am. I could not have been able to keep myself from laughing out loud and then saying, “Oh wait. You’re serious.”</p>