There was a committee that created a top choice list before rush ever began. We were focusing on those rushees.
My sorority was one of those where multiple sorority alum recommendations were required to be invited beyond the first party. We already had a targeted first choice pledge class long before rush began.
eta… I’m 63. I’m still upset about how we chose our sorority sisters, and went inactive as soon as I could to avoid repeating the experience.
My kids’ sorority did not require recommendations and the rush was after the first semester, but they started to check out freshmen girls over the summer. By the rush week they already had their top picks and knew quite a bit about them. They made sure those girls were paired up with people who had similar interests when they walked through the door. My understanding is the whole meet and greet were very well orchestrated and rehearsed.
@oldfort Agreed and confirmed for sororities. Frats are more on the spot but after the first day of rush the frats will have a list of target guys they want to join. In regards to the comment of a random lottery system for rush, that honestly defeats the purpose. The whole point is to find a like minded group of people you want to be friends with. Randomizing it would make for awkward groups of people who may not get along on a social level. It’s the same idea as being able to choose ones friends.
I rushed Freshman year and didn’t accept the bid to the sorority that offered it, so rushed Sophomore year and got the bid to a popular sorority [it was so not me but I was so flattered]. I ended up not really enjoying the experience. One of my Daughter’s best friends pledged a fraternity and got in lots of trouble around drinking and ended up leaving the fraternity. He’s doing great now. They sometimes have open rush after the big rush and if some spots are open he could pledge. I tried to do that my Freshman year and was so excited about a sorority but I didn’t do the process right so couldn’t give me a bid [I skipped a party and you had to go to all open parties or something it was looong ago and I remember being so sad for a little bit]. It will all work out.
Oh, I know this argument style. The other side of it is “How can you criticize something if you don’t know anything about it?” I get on Greekchat to learn what people who support fraternities and sororities think about fraternities and sororities. Greekchat, actually, is a pretty interesting board; reading it makes clear the benefits and the drawbacks of fraternity/sorority life.
Greekrank, on the other hand, is a sewer. If you ever buy the idea that there are no “tiers” in sororities, a trip to Greekrank will disabuse you. I went there because I wanted to understand what happened with the national Kappa Alpha Theta shutting down their chapters at Ole Miss and Clemson. In both cases, it was the same sad story; their chapters at both schools had become the lowest-rank, undesirable sororities, and not enough women were joining. (And the ones who did join were not pretty or conventionally feminine enough, if you believe some posters. Certainly the sororities appeared to have more overweight members than other sororities, judging by their videos.) Although membership was stable at both schools, and the women who were in the chapters loved being sisters and did all the sorority things like substantial philanthropy, the national body shut them both down right after they selected this year’s pledge classes. Bad news for the next-lowest sororities at those schools; if everything is a social competition you need losers, and once Theta is gone, the next-lowest sorority will be in the gunsights.
@alh, Thank you for sharing. The history of these groups is fascinating. It sounds like different areas of the country had different customs.
Still have different customs. My sorority does rush today, just like in 1974. I know alums involved.
If anything, it’s more competitive. It’s sure not less so.
@Cardinal Fang - I don’t think anyone would need to go on those Greek forums to know there are tiering in sororities. My kids were in one of top tier sororities at their school and were head of rush in their respective years, and I don’t think they bothered to browse or post on those forums. I am sure the way they selected their top picks were probably kind of shallow in some respect, but at the end of day they were trying to attract girls whom they would like to hang out with. Their sorority sisters were not the biggest partiers. They adhered to most of rules and wanted members to be safe when they went to parties. They had sisters who were sober at every party to make no one was too drunk (a water bottle is given to someone as a sign to stop drinking), and fraternities they were having mixers with would have to brothers who were sober to drive them home. I remember my kid telling me that they stopped having mixer with a fraternity because they saw designated drivers were drinking at the party.
I understand that some people, particularly adolescents, like socially exclusive clubs. That is their right. What I don’t understand is why nonprofit educational institutions receiving millions of dollars in federal aid and taxpayer assistance support, or at least permit, these clubs on their property. They don’t appear to be central to, or even consistent with, a university’s mission.
Not everyone enjoys sports, theater, band, political parties…but schools still sponsor them because some students like them.
Plenty of adults enjoy exclusive clubs.
Oldfort, those adult exclusive clubs don’t enjoy tax exemptions. That is the price of their exclusivity. Schools sponsor things, in theory, that will promote the students’ growth in intellect, culture, character, health,morals, etc etc. Not clear how exclusive clubs fit into that charter.
Idk. Is a living learning community an exclusive club? Not everyone gets in.
roycroftmom -I think most of those ECs I listed do not admit everyone, but are still sponsored and supported by schools. You may not agree, but my kids did learn and grow by their participation in the Greek life. It did not define them while they were in school, but was definitely part of their growth.
@oldfort Greek life has given me leadership opportunities I couldn’t have had outside of the system. Those leadership positions have lead to internships which hopefully lead to a job upon graduation. Like your daughters, I’ve had an amazing experience.
So the message is that Greek life offers huge benefits that can’t be obtained elsewhere and entrance to this exclusive club is based on shallow criteria created by 19 and 20-year-olds? That doesn’t exactly sound like a ringing endorsement for these types of groups.
The benefits CAN be found elsewhere on campus, but every student can’t do every single one so they join greek life to get leadership experience or because of an interest in a certain charity or because there are a lot of other engineers in that house. Everyone can’t be in student government, work at the school’s student activity board, on the newspaper, join the business club, or be on the robotics team. Everyone can’t be in the marching band, or on the dance team, or live in the honor’s dorm even if they reallyreallyreally want to. There are dozens of things on campus actually funded by the school where everyone can’t participate. Some Greek houses are totally separate from the school and receive no funding at all from the school or the other students (the one I lived in). At other schools the school rents the land to the organization and the organization pays rent on the land and puts up a $10M house (Alabama).
At my school the houses are privately owned by the fraternity or sorority house corps. All money comes from dues and donations from alumni. The school doesn’t pay a cent.
@austinmshauri - yes, how some sororities select their members can be shallow, but there are also many good things that sororities can do for some people. Not everything college has to offer needs to be good for everyone, because it is always a student’s option whether he/she wants to join.
My girls used to do ballet 15 hrs per week for 10+ years. I could come up with a dozen reason why it may not be good for everyone, but my kids loved their experience. And there were some very shallow aspect of ballet.
I’m certain that many people do enjoy Greek life, and feel that they benefit from participation. The same could be said for beauty pageants, but most colleges don’t endorse those on campus. Some probably do, I suppose.
What I’m learning from this thread is that this isn’t the case with Greek life at all. It seems many 18- and 19-year-olds want desperately to join but they’re excluded by other young people for what seem like very flimsy reasons.