<p>A sublet is essentially a rent takeover. If someone signed a 1 year lease on an apartment, but needs to move out after 8 months, they can look for someone to pay the last four month’s rent so the lease holder doesn’t have to. However this generally requires a couple hundred dollar deposit along with monthly rent installments. Subletting is generally a good idea during the summer, but not for shorter breaks. Here’s a decent description from Rutgers: [Subletting</a> | Off-Campus Housing Services](<a href=“http://ruoffcampus.rutgers.edu/information-renters/subletting]Subletting”>Subletting – Off-Campus Living and Community Partnerships)</p>
<p>For the shorter breaks, it’s possible to find a short terms place on Craigslist or at a week by week motel (no idea if this is a viable option where you’re going to school). Many schools also sponsor Spring Break volunteer trips, and at least at my school, give out full scholarships to low income students who want to go on them. Perhaps your school does something similar.</p>
<p>My parents were stationed abroad while I was in college, and I didn’t usually go home other than Christmas. Not because they wouldn’t have me, but I always had invitations from friends to go places that were closer and cheaper. In the summer, I was generally able to find jobs providing evening childcare in exchange for room and board, while working a day job. </p>
<p>I agree that your parents might well change their mind, but if they don’t, I don’t think it will be that hard to find someplace to go.</p>
<p>I wouldn’t bother trying to get them to change their mind. This is about control, and if it’s not one thing, it’s going to be another. Parents shouldn’t be disciplining their children into their college years. They should be done. </p>
<p>You need to get to the point where you have your own “home”, be it a dorm, or a summer sublet (a short-term rental), etc, that is beyond their control. Try to minimize drama when you are around your parents. It’s easy to inflame the situation if you get emotional. For now, you need them to cooperate with your FAFSA stuff. </p>
<p>Just act like everything is fine, and try not to be around them much because you have other things to do and places to be.</p>
<p>You can probably visit friends during breaks that don’t include major holidays, such as Spring Break, but it’s awkward to visit a friend on Thanksgiving Day or Christmas Day because there will usually be a family celebration, and it may not be the family’s custom to include people who are not family members. So there would be the problem of what to do with you. They might feel awkward including you, but they would feel just as awkward leaving you out.</p>
<p>Visiting a relative doesn’t have the same problem.</p>
<p>This has to be about more than just a messy room. Parents might get mad about their kids not cleaning their room. But not letting them stay in the house because of it? A bit extreme to say the least.</p>
<p>I couldn’t go home between breaks (for different, unresolvable reasons) and I had to find housing for different periods. So I did different things.</p>
<p>*During the summers, I worked and found an apartment to pay rent. I typically subleased from another student who was during an internship or something somewhere else.</p>
<p>*The winter break was harder, because there wasn’t enough time to really work or sublet an apartment but my college wouldn’t let me stay during the winter break. Sometimes I stayed with my long-term boyfriend’s family - I think that’s what I typically did during that time.</p>
<p>As for the furniture in your bedroom at home - did you buy it yourself? Because my parents bought my furniture, and I just left it there.</p>
<p>I WISH I could have lived off campus in college. Yes, it may be better to move off because then you don’t have to move in and out every break; your one problem will be finding a way to pay the rent during the summer. My scholarship required me to live on campus, but it was a huge pain in the butt because I had to move in and out every break. I also hated it because at my college, everyone moved off campus junior year, so I was one of the very few juniors and seniors living on campus. (In retrospect, I suppose I could’ve “lived” on campus but actually gotten an apartment elsewhere, if I wanted to; nobody was really checking to see if I had actually moved onto campus. It’s just that the college wouldn’t have paid for it.) Only your college’s financial aid office would know how moving off campus would affect your financial aid; some college’s may pay for you to live regardless of where you want to live, whereas others will only fund on-campus living.</p>
<p>*</p>
<p>FWIW, parents - it is indeed very possible for a kid to get kicked out for a messy room. My younger sister, who is currently 22, got kicked out of the house (she goes to college full-time) in part because of her messy room. But that’s because “messy room” for her actually meant ankle-deep dirty clothes and debris on the floor and two-week old cups of milk and dirty dishes and distributed garbage on the floor. When you walked in, you could SMELL it. Even the dog refused to go in there. You know how your mom always said “This room looks like a tornado hit it”? My sister’s room literally looked like a tornado hit it. Maybe twice. And FEMA never came. And it was like that for YEARS. It was like that when I was in college, and I graduated 5 years ago. She just got kicked out a few months ago.</p>
<p>It also was a bit more than that - her room was one symptom of a general problem of being unwilling to follow (mostly reasonable) house rules and basic respect and decency. She refused to clean it up. So she got kicked out. She’s fine; she’s living with a friend. To be honest, she probably needed the push to develop some independence. And her new room is spotless.</p>
<p>Student meet control freak! Apologizing is the obvious answer but in all likelihood if it’s not the room it will be something else to pick on. Try working and saving money for the days that the dorms close down.</p>
<p>Does your college offer on campus apartments (or something similar)? My college offered on campus apartments in addition to the residential dorms, and while the dorms closed over winter and spring breaks, the apartment residents were allowed to stay over breaks. There was also housing for international students and transfer students that also housed students who were neither international nor transfers, and they were allowed to stay over breaks. Students in transfer housing were also allowed to stay in the same apartment over summer, as well. Something to look into to see if your university offers something similar.</p>
<p>Also, find out if your college has off-campus listings, a facebook group for housing, or something similar. Many students who live off campus go home for major breaks or holidays, and while they probably won’t advertise it, they may be willing to let you rent out their room for the breaks for a portion of their monthly rent.</p>
<p>For sophomore year, I would recommend you find somewhere off campus if you are still able to afford it. It will be a lot easier than moving around on campus and having to figure out where you’ll be over the summer or next year. I would also recommend that you find a part time job or two during the school year (on campus is often the easiest), even if you don’t immediately need the money. You may need to dip into your savings if you need to find housing at the last minute that you don’t immediately have the money for.</p>
<p>There’s more to this than a messy room. Nobody who is “normal” kicks a child out for leaving a suitcase out in their room for a couple of weeks. </p>
<p>What’s mom saying? It sounds like this is mom’s home. It sounds like dad was in jail and then moved back into mom’s home? </p>
<p>Does mom know about and agree with this text?</p>
<p>As for paying for summer classes, you may not have the money to do that. Do you have relatives that you can stay with?</p>
<p>Wow did not expect so many responses in such little time, thank you to all who have replied I will try to address as many questions/ suggestions as I can in this post. </p>
<p>Where to start where to start… Lets see, my school UCSB, did offer housing accommodations during the thanks giving break however this was something that you had to specify by July 1st. Winter break which is a bit longer does not offer this, and everyone dorming must remove their stuff each quarter, even though we return to the same room. </p>
<p>I have an older step sister who would more than likely take me in, since she has offered in the past. I usually watch her kids often, she’s married and has her own home so I guess this arrangement could be somewhat mutually beneficial. As for the furniture in my room, I did in fact purchase all if it on my own with the exception of the TV which was a birthday gift, I doubt my mom would mind if I took it. Regarding the questions, about where my mom stands on this issue etc. yes this is essentially my mothers home as she pays almost all of the rent herself (I help her a bit about 300 a month) my dad is not really working its hard for him to get a job. My mom is quite the opposite of my father, he’s the dominant one in the house, and she is quite passive, she always says, “we’ll if you would have cleaned it etc…” However I don’t think she agrees about the whole me not being able to come back during breaks (although not sure she’d stand her ground) not that I’d expect her too I do not go to one parent in disagreements as I do not like to be in the middle of those matters. </p>
<p>Hmm, storage I think is my main problem I have worked for everything in my room it’s all I own and I do not want it thrown away etc. however I’d imagine storing my stuff would be very expensive, as much as rent, and I currently only make 600 a month, which I’m saving as living money because I’d like to not work my first quarter, as I’d like to adjust a little, although this may no longer be an option. As far as sophomore year goes I believe I will definitely lease a room so I do not have to worry about storing my belongings or going home every ten weeks. </p>
<p>Could you store some things in your sister’s basement? Some self-storage places have very small units for $50 a month that would fit a small bedroom worth of stuff. Or, sell what you can, and buy things later after college…</p>
<p>lol, is is rare/unusual for CA homes to have basements.</p>
<p>CaliforniaRooted, it does seem like it would be best to house yourself off campus. Even if your father relents now, having your own place would place you out of range of his whims. I see you don’t like to get between your parents, but this is a big deal as it is going to be awkward your first year, since you have to remove between quarters. At least ask your mother if she is fine with you never coming home again. I’d just leave your stuff in your room until you get your own place then find some friends to help you move the stuff, or look on craigslist.</p>
<p>When my daughter was in college on financial aid, she found that it was cheaper to live off campus sharing housing and making most of her own food, than paying the school prices. So her financial aid covered a set amount for housing and food and she got to keep any excess funds. Aside from shared rental houses and apartments, you can look for rooms for rent, or rooms in exchange for babysitting. Also don’t overlook grad student listserve, as grad students will likely be more responsible and less partying types, if they will take an undergrad.</p>
<p>CaliforniaRooted, there are students at UCSB in a somewhat similar situation who can never go home again (one of them went to my high school), and they have facebook accounts. If UCSB has a campus tips page or anything where freshmen can ask questions, you could ask how students who can’t go home for the breaks store their things. People will almost certainly answer your questions, and may even extend a helping hand. Often multiple students share a rental space which presents substantial savings assuming that your bedroom is in fact normal sized and not gigantic. </p>
<p>The UCs also have ridiculously expensive housing so even a POS place in Isla Vista (live on the outskirts where there’s less partying) will probably cost less than the dorms. After your first year, try to get one so that you won’t have to deal with any uncertainties regarding living situations. </p>
<p>You may also want to send an email to UCSB housing explaining your situation. Sometimes housing makes exceptions, particularly when home life is dangerous (be sure to mention that your dad spent time in prison for a violent offense). If not, you have your sister as a fall back. Other parents may also be glad to host you for shorter breaks if need be.</p>
Glad she turned around…maybe there’s hope for mine yet! ;)</p>