So sorry @katliamom!
So hard @katliamom Best wishes to all of you.
Sorry to hear that, @katliamom. Ugh, it seems to happen fast a lot of times.
Mainelonghorn, that is impressive. That nurse should think about the fact that we have more than one presidential candidate almost 80! I hope your Dad continues to rebound.
kailiamom, hope that they can get the heart failure under control and they don’t have to move to AL- unless they want to. I think the move is traumatic but living in an Al can be okay once there- at least in my experience. Hoping no big changes for your family just yet and that the medical issue is quickly addressable.
Compmom, tell us you’re taking care of yourself, too. The flu can be awful. Gentle hugs.
Sorry for the challenges and uncertainty, @katliamom. The ambiguity is tough and you want the best for each of them.
Geez guys, I am savoring being sick. No responsibilities for a few days. I’m truly shocked at myself!
You really needed the break, even if it had to be forced on you. Good lesson to take time for yourself as you care for your mother.
I remember recently needing to have a tooth filled and being secretly glad that I had an hour and a half where all I had to do was lie back and do NOTHING. How weird is that.
You definitely need to take care of yourself compmom!!
Has anyone purchased a bed aid to help their loved one get out of bed? I saw this and am wondering if it could help. (I care for my mom 24/7 in my home.)
My mom will no longer do anything without me asking, repeating, and telling her each distinct task 20 or more times. (Please sit up. (over and over.) Legs out. Feet on floor. Lean forward. Hands by sides. Push up. Hold walker. Etc.)
Yet, she is still physically capable of doing each movement. I’m wondering if this handle would be useful?
My goal is to keep her as physically independent as possible for as long as possible. It would be easier/faster (not on my back though) to just help lift her, but I think she would lose more strength if I did that.
Thoughts?
Yes, my dad had a bed cane almost exactly like that one–just without the fabric part. The physical therapist at his assisted living facility recommended it after a regularly scheduled physical therapy assessment. They had them there and installed it right then at a similar price. He was similarly confused about what to do to accomplish standing up and it helped a lot.It also helped with moving around in bed. He had a double bed and it allowed him to get back in position after he got crooked in bed. (Sometimes needed cueing.)
I could use that now, with my injured ribs.
But I’m afraid you’d still need to cue her to each step. It’s a toss up whether she’d get the sense of it. Otoh, if it aids holding herself stable when sitting up, maybe.
That’s right, it’s not the whole answer but it is a big improvement over helping them without the cane. And eventually my dad instinctively reached for it.
Oh, I have no expectation of it helping with cueing her. That has progressively become worse as her dementia advances. I am only wondering if others have tried it. It might help her to have a handle on the bed to grasp. She tries to reach for her walker, but does not have the core strength to pull herself up leaning that far forward. She pushes off the bed. I’m always looking for assistive devices to keep her as physically active as possible.
Interesting @psychmomma. I had never heard of this. Hope it helps. I am going to look into it too.
The real heroes, to me, are people like you doing 24/7 at home. When I got sick, I could drive away and be alone for a couple of days.
Yes! My husband used one of those for years, as his muscle power weakened. I needed it after I had surgery in January, but my helper said it wasn’t in the attic. I ordered another one, then my daughter said ours is in the attic. I’m going to have to go up there myself and see; I can’t believe my helping person doesn’t remember it because it was on the bed for years. They are great.
Thanks @Curiousreader and @mykidsgranny. I’m going to look into getting one.
Here’s something interesting. I had to sign a new contract when I moved the folks to memory care from personal care. Fine. I am POA and I signed on all the “Financial Care Partner” lines too. But the business manager says the state requires them to get the actual resident to sign on the contracts.
There is no way I am going to bring a 25 page contract to my parents to sign. They already think I convinced the doctors to “put them away” and think I am lying about my mom’s stroke etc. So there is no way they would sign, and I don’t need them seeing the dollar amounts either because their ability with numbers is not good (they were okay when we first moved them in a couple of years ago)
I said to the business manager “This is a MEMORY CARE facility for people who are UNSAFE on their own!” She smiled and understood my frustration but said it is part of her job, to document that they have tried at least three times to get the resident to sign.
No way in heck that I am doing that.
Can you just report that you tried on three different days so they can tick the box, but obvi, don’t really try!