@dragonmom is your BFF’s dad getting oxygen in the memory care unit? Our local hospice is not taking on COVID cases unless the patient is already on hospice. Perhaps that was the case with this dad.
I assume that when oxygen and morphine are needed for comfort care, that in this virus situation, they will have to be in the hospital. Is that true?
We family members ordinarily can be present to help. Not possible now.
I am just wondering if, when truly terminal and uncomfortable, memory care and assisted living facilities will allow them to remain in their rooms.
The CCRC where my folks live(d) sent my mom a framed photo of my late father and card. It was a nice, unexpected gesture. Wish they had been kinder to dad while he was alive.
I did a FB message video with my Mom two days ago (she’s in a nursing home, memory care) and it was so good to see her looking well. Our conversation was not so good and I realized I need to change my expectations. Between a big hearing problem and dementia, she mis-heard just about everything I said. Any ideas for communicating with her?
@walkinghome I have no ideas. My parents need hearing aids but they constantly take them out and lose them, so we took them away for a bit. When I Facetime, usually the staff person has to repeat what I say, shouting it to mom or dad
I think my mom has a UTI. They called me to say she was being very mean to dad, they were fighting etc. and this is very uncharacteristic of her, even after the stroke. In fact, I never saw them fight much ever, beyond civilized disagreements. So I suggested testing her for a UTI. I got an email from Labcorp today that showed elevated WBC and esterase and crystals, but the nurse said they still have to wait for a culture to grow to be sure.
I feel so bad for both of them, to be so upset over something that is not real. They are trying to separate them but there is no extra room. I am busy with work during this situation and to be totally honest, I have started a habit of trying to compartmentalize thinking about them during the day, because it is upsetting and not helpful to me. Then I have resulting guilt that I am not doing more (whatever “more” is) to help.
We have been in touch with my Dad’s memory care. They say he seems happy but is upset that he can’t go to the facility gym. He often gets agitated when we visit. I think maybe he remembers just a little bit of his old life. So maybe us not visiting isn’t as hard on him as it is on us.
@surfcity, I get frequent UTI’s. I KNOW when I’m getting one. The first test is always inconclusive; they always have to sent out for a culture. At least it’s happened often enough that my doctor starts me on antibiotics before getting the culture results back!
@tx5athome , my Mom didn’t get agitated when I visited, but she did when my brother did. And my old friend now in memory care did get very agitated, so I stopped visiting. I went mostly to show staff that someone cares about this person. Her niece moved her farther away (cheap AND better care) so I hope postcards make staff realize she is a person.
@Mainelonghorn. DH gets frequent UTI’s last one got on a weekend and went to urgent care just to get the lab quickly. Got a 3 day antibiotic. When he wasn’t better after 6 days (heading to worse) he contacted his regular Dr and he prescribed 10 days, stronger antibiotic just over email because he knows DH history. But I think he needed a lab first anyway.
10 resident cases, 4 staff (2 deaths included in the 10). At this point 3 are in isolation in memory care and 4 are in the hospital. So one recovered I guess.
Our state has done a lot with nursing homes and has a website with a lot of stats and other info, very transparent. Not yet with assisted livings. We rely on texts from the director which come once or twice a week. I asked, and our assisted living is not asking for the National Guard to bring mobile testing of the whole facility, which is now possible. That would be a baseline, and better, in my view, than taking temps. I’ve asked executive director and nursing director and got a no.
I still find it hard to believe there were 55 cases at one facility in Augusta, Maine reported over last weekend! Yikes.
My good friend’s older brother is disabled and in a facility near us. He tested positive and was hospitalized for a few days this week. He’s doing better now. He had a lot of underlying medical conditions, so he was lucky.
As of Friday, our state is also posting positive cases among residents and staff at assisted living facilities. It is reported if over 2 cases, and has under 10, 10-30 and over 30. I was surprised that some facilities I am familar with are still under 2, including memory care facilities. My mother’s is 10-30.
I am not going to visit with her in the driveway anymore. With masks, distance and hearing issues it is more upsetting to her than me not being there. Actually I pressed up against a downstairs window as did she, and we felt closer that way. We talked by phone but could kind of have physical contact through glass.
I can’t recall if I mentioned this, but the facility my mom had already signed up for is giving her a credit for May since she hasn’t moved in yet. I guess we’ll reach out to them in a few weeks if everything is still shut down. I know Texas overall is planning on opening up some, but Austin is stricter.
My dad fell last night. Forgot to take his insulin and got weak. Thankfully he was able to press his life alert button. He bruised his ribs but the squad didn’t think he needed to go into the hospital. I really wish he’d consider moving to an assisted living after things settle down but know that he’s not going to happen. He always says his neighbors would hear him if he fell but it was 2:45 AM and they didn’t hear a thing. At least he agree to sleep with his unused walker at his bedside.
@momofsenior1 how does that situation work? Did ALS give him insulin and then just leave him there? Did they measure his ketones? I don’t understand and with a famly member with diabetes would love to know.
