<p>I'm a parent asking: Is it okay for parents or teachers to go on Facebook and request to add you as a friend? Do you feel like to do so is an invasion of your privacy?</p>
<p>I don't feel I have anything to hide from my mother. Most of my teachers who have Facebooks are the type of teachers who aren't snooping for minor offenses to get them in trouble.</p>
<p>My mother is on Facebook and I've never felt like my privacy has been invaded. After all, it is the Internet - NOTHING is private.</p>
<p>Um, I don't rly do anything wrong or say anything wrong, but I would feel awkward. I woud need to make sure I didn't say anything "wrong" if my parents had it. I wouldnt mind as much if they were teachers. I don't know. I just wouldn't feel at ease...</p>
<p>I have two sons in college and work with teenagers. Facebook has some marvelous features for chat, staying in touch with your own lost friends from work and school, and also, with the privacy settings that the user can enable, allows you to "decide" which friends see which information about you. It is easy to download pictures that you can have only certain groups or people see. Both my kids (and many of their friends) actually requested me to be their friend. Not a big deal. </p>
<p>If a young person puts something on facebook, realize that if it isn't your mom or dad, it may be a future employer or scholarship committee who might just be checking on you. It is in the public forum and if you would be embarrassed that your grandmother sees you doing something stupid, why have it out there in cyberspace?</p>
<p>Most of the kids that I know on facebook demonstrate their personalities without showing any illegal behavior.</p>
<p>I think it's pretty weird/awkward if it's a high school student, but if the student is in college and does not live at home i'd feel it would be normal.</p>
<p>Why would high school be weirder than college? Odds are better the kids are well, getting into more TROUBLE in college!</p>
<p>As Georgeanne says in a previous post, "nothing is private" on the internet. </p>
<p>One concern for everyone with facebook - make sure you don't put your entire life out there available for any predator to see. I am not just talking about preying on young pre-teens, either. Facebook has filters - you should use them! Make sure only friends can see the details that you want. Don't allow every network and individual to see details that you would prefer they didn't (especially employers - current and future).</p>
<p>I totally agree. The filters feature is just amazing. When I go to college, I will certainly be using it to hide things such as my photos, et cetera, as I work at a Girl Scout camp and I have to maintain some sort of divide between my campers and myself.</p>
<p>This is what was done when I attended a summer program this year, as well - my RAs put me on their 'limited profile' so I could only see certain things. After the summer, I was taken off. It just makes relationships easier.</p>
<p>The responses so far represent my own mixed feelings. My kids think it's creeppy when a teacher asks to be a friend and they have just ignored the request. When their relative who is a teacher asked they felt awkward saying no. It's not that either of them are doing anything wrong, it's just a boundary issue, IMO. The relative mentioned to me that my daughter had changed her location to her new school location--I felt as if the relative was sort of gossiping (not that there was anything untoward or even gossip-worthy about it, it just felt mildly wrong to me). I guess I liken it to asking if one can be a member of a group of friends who get together on a regular basis to keep up on each other's lives. It's okay to express interest, (e.g. "Oh, I have a Facebook page too!") but an invitation seems more appropriate that a request.</p>
<p>I wholeheartedly agree with those who warn of the public nature of anything put on the internet. My daughter learned the hard way when one of her friends used cut and paste to send a comment to a teacher that was normal teenage venting and could only have been written by her. The teacher then blew it out of proportion and interrogated the whole class and basically made a federal case out it. (The same teacher is the only one to have ever asked to be a friend on Facebook.)</p>
<p>Okay, I'm a student who has Facebook. I've friended my mother and my aunts/unlces who have Facebook. I have nothing to hide from them, and if your kid is very hostile in not letting you (a generic parent) friend them, I would question what they're doing. At worst, they could politely refuse in a calm manner and that would be understandable. If they explode, I would probably be worried.</p>
<p>Also, my school has no official Facebook policy toward teacher/student relations. However, the teachers unanimously agree not to friend students. Some feel that they want to keep their professional and personal lives separate, others worry about the potential consequences and liabilities. I agree with them and I think that a teacher who attempts to friend a student is crossing a line. The incident should at least be mentioned to the administration. I friended one of my teachers/advisers because he left the school recently. I don't see any problem with this, because our relationship is no longer professional, it's social. I plan to friend my teachers once I graduate to stay in touch with them. We will be on opposite sides of the country most likely as well.</p>
<p>If you feel it is weird, than don't get one. There are plenty of advantages, as I have spoken about, but you sound like you continue to be conflicted about it, so put the issue aside, for now. The largest growth of new facebook members isn't high school or college students, but in the older than 25 years old adult population. </p>
<p>In terms of the wall postings, everyone sees those - but you can write a message to a friend and only that friend "sees" it. I have a co-worker who won't answer the phone or an email, but will post me information about our work schedules, upcoming meetings, etc, only on facebook.</p>
<p>I think that facebook is much like what cell phones were like 10 or 12 years ago - first only a few had them. Then the population grew, and now nearly everyone has them. You can join the bandwagon now, or later, but I predict eventually you will join Facebook to connect with friends and family!</p>
<p>I don't chat with my student clients on facebook (I am not a teacher, but work with college bound kids) - but I do have a blog that I post information that is relevant to them. They can see it and contact me, but I don't send them messages. I find that would be crossing a line.</p>
<p>If you want a way to chat with your kids/people in general, check out Skype, if you haven't investigated it already. It's where you talk in real time with people (TALK, not type). It's free at this point and the quality is quite good. Unlike cell phones, talking to people through Skype costs no money. You have the option to call their cell (not free), but I don't see why you would.</p>
<p>It's o.k. for teachers that are on the younger side, but it's so weird for parents, whether or not they're using it to monitor their kids.</p>
<p>^For the record, I disagree completely. If anything, having a young teacher as a friend on Facebook is an even WORSE idea than having a 50-year-old teacher as a FB friend. There has been a rash of cases where teachers were in relationships with students in my area, and having teachers (especially ones close in age to the students) as friends is, in my opinion, an absolutely TERRIBLE idea.</p>
<p>Also, I can understand the "no parents" rule for high schoolers, but in college I don't see why it would be a problem. Easy contact, access to pictures of trips and travel, and just school in general, etc.</p>
<p>I think it'd be weird, because in high school you live in the same household with your parent.</p>
<p>I think that (if the student is in highschool) it would be exorbitant and a waste of bandwidth. If you don't see your family all too often (e.g. while in college), then a facebook would be more appropriate.</p>
<p>It's like getting a text message telling you to "come downstairs and go eat dinner". What a waste of cell phone radiation.</p>
<p>true - it would be a waste of bandwidth. As if any kid cares about that, though! Isn't this the generation of kids who text each other - often across a room - instead of talking with their friends? The kids who IM each other instead of hanging out with their friends?</p>
<p>I doubt seriously any parent is sending a message on facebook to tell their kids to come to dinner. That would be ridiculous.</p>
<p>The original poster wondered whether or not it would be appropriate to friend your teenager on facebook. I guess it would be weirder if my kids chose not to be my friend and told me that.</p>
<p>I think I would have an awfully hard time paying for their internet, after that point. I guess they could always pay for their internet, and their cell phones, and their car insurance, gas, etc. </p>
<p>Just my opinion.</p>
<p>^Haha. If I were a parent, that's what I would do! I'm surprised at how entitled today's kids are. I am fortunate to have been blessed with many things, and I try to remember how unnecessary some of them are, but I try my best!</p>
<p>Sorry to go on a tangent but how does one delete a FaceBook account? </p>
<p>I just never use mine and I get a billion requests etc and I want to start afresh.</p>