Please Grade my Essay!

<p>Prompt: Do changes that make our life easier not necessarily make them better?</p>

<p>Ideas that appear well on paper do not often translate t inventions that function as so. Inventions such as the cellphone appear at first to simplify our lives and improve them, while lacking the ability to do us harm. However, time and time again, these creations are demonstrated to have impaired humanity as a whole. Change that simplifies life does not necessarily improve life.</p>

<p>In Ray Bradbury's novel, Fahrenheit 451, the people live a simplistic lifestyle-the day is spent indoors, staring at a television the size of a wall. This change, which was due to the laws of the dictatorial government, simplifies the lives of all the people tremendously. However, it is the antithesis of improvement, a change that permanently impaired entire generations from being capable of critical thought. The introduction of laws allowing anyone to spend their lives in leisure is a change that was welcomed at first, and viewed as a divine gift. However, the change carried the possibility of harm with it. Had these laws not been created, the populace would have had to work, but would have also kept their aptitude for making decisions-a situation irrefutably better.</p>

<p>The tragic death of John Dropersingh in the spring of 2007 is another example of how simpler is not equivalent to better. The late Dropersingh died while using a new device-a super-tiny cellular phone. This phone was introduced as a way to simplify the task of carrying a cell phone by having it permanently embedded within the ear. A superb idea on paper, it was later revealed not to work as well in reality-the phone, being so small, could not withstand the pressure generated by a component inside the phone, and erupted, sending fragments into John Dropersingh's brain, killing him. Had this idea never been conceived, a hard-working man's life would have been spared. A Change marketed as a simplifier of life with little risk of harm ultimately turned out for the worse, not better.</p>

<p>As may be seen from the examples of the people in Fahrenheit 451, and of the untimely death of John Dropersingh, change that simplifies life is not always an improvement, regardless of how it may appear in theory.</p>

<p>9/12…not horrible just not complex enough. It was a decent read, but needs some work here and there. I would give indepth analysis of the essay but im a bit tired. If you really want my critiques I will write them sometime tomorrow if you remind me. Good job though, I answered the same prompt last year.</p>