<p>it doesn't matter whether you are from the "bible belt" or not. principled people live anywhere. and you don't have to be dog-gone religious to have morals either. </p>
<p>and i agree, whoever said sex is no big deal has 1. not had it or 2. has a reputation</p>
<p>There IS such a thing as safe premarital sex, you know.</p>
<p>i know, but not everyone would want to get checked up every time they wanted to have sex.</p>
<p>yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!</p>
<p>stuck-on-1700,</p>
<p>It's perfectly possible to be in a monogamous relationship before marriage and not worry about getting diseases. It's not like my quasi-sorta-fiancée and I go down and get tested the day before we do the deed. Based on a logical assumption using past evidence, we both happily hop in the sack, knowing that the other partner is honest and clean. </p>
<p>And most people I know never got checkups because they have learned to trust their spouse well enough that they can basically assume (a strong assumption based on experience, mind you) that their partner is clean.</p>
<p>so noooww i know why we have an AIDs epidemic that kills millions each year.</p>
<p>bendrumfront, do you think that sex is evil by nature?</p>
<p>hmmm let me think about this</p>
<p>Seriously, ben. As I said, there is such a thing as safe premarital sex. If that's not your thing, then don't engage in it. But don't go around accusing the premarital-sexers of causing an AIDS epidemic. That's irresponsible.</p>
<p>Please don't think that I'm accusing you of anything or judging you in any way, because really, I have no right to do either of that.</p>
<p>
[quote]
it doesn't matter whether you are from the "bible belt" or not. principled people live anywhere. and you don't have to be dog-gone religious to have morals either.
[/quote]
From that, it would appear that you do. I don't believe that sex is evil by nature. Therefore, I don't believe that premarital sex is immoral or in-principled.</p>
<p>Sex could be good or bad, depending on the circumstances around it. Premarital sex isn't always about promiscuity or power.</p>
<p>I don't know if that helps any.</p>
<p>
[quote]
so noooww i know why we have an AIDs epidemic that kills millions each year.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>So you're suggesting that because I engage in premarital sex with someone who I've partnered with for over 7 years that I'm somehow contributing to the STD pool?</p>
<p>That makes sense.</p>
<p>Oh, and having had sex many times now, I can say this much: People make it into a much bigger deal than it actually is.</p>
<p>To those who describe virginity as "something to give": I find that entire concept disgusting. I've heard many people -- mainly girls -- talk about why they're waiting in terms of, "save your body for your husband because he WANTS it the most." What does that even mean? That a woman is only valuable to her husband if he is the first to have intercourse with her, because by being her first he "possesses" some part of her?</p>
<p>I just don't see why that should be so important to a marriage. I would think that a marriage should be about much more than the physical act of sex.</p>
<p>I think the choice to abstain -- whether it's until you're married or in a serious, loving relationship -- should be for the sake of taking care of yourself and respecting your body, not so you can "give" something to your husband.</p>
<p>I would think that much of premarital sex is based on fun, sometimes love, and rarely out of power.</p>
<p>HopefulBulldog, remember that males can also be called virgins, and so they too have "something to give" to their wives. Virginity (the concept) can be but doesn't have to be sexist.
Also, it's a personal choice. So what if an individual decides that his or her virginity is a gift to another person? It's not their actual virginity they're giving to someone. You can't give it, it's not a tangible thing. It's more of an emotional thing, related to trust. If people want to think that, it won't hurt anyone. They're free to think as they wish.</p>
<p>
[quote]
I just don't see why that should be so important to a marriage. I would think that a marriage should be about much more than the physical act of sex.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>Yes, but sex is a big part of a happy marriage.</p>
<p>woah people, calm down, we can make jokes on CC, right? hey, i'm all for premarital sex, as long as you pay the childsupport for the next 18 years and get yourself tested for AIDs and I also need a DNA map to make sure, just in case the condom and birth contorl fail, my kid's gonna be normal.</p>
<p>Mallomar, I wrote about women only because in my experience, the only people I've heard talk about sex in that way were women. I know some men feel the same way. In either case, male or female, it doesn't make sense. Marriage is about partnership, not possession.</p>
<p>I still say that premarital sex is something that's between a couple. I could go either way, depending on who I'm with.</p>
<p>
[quote]
males can also be called virgins, and so they too have "something to give" to their wives.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>The wife will probably enjoy "getting something" (hehe) from their husbands if they have a little experience. Who knows, it could be the best...2 minutes of their lives?</p>
<p>Experience is only part of it. The wife also has to be a little open sexually as well. It's a two-way street, kids!</p>