<p>so I have this friend. He's generally a nice guy to me. However, he can be a total jerk too. He's really cocky and acts like he's smarter than everyone else, just because he's a year younger and graduating with us. I call him out on his crap a lot because I'm one of the few people that catches on to his bs (he sometimes acts like he knows what he's talking about and puts other people down even though he's talking out of his ass)</p>
<p>Anyway, he is a pretty smart kid. He is taking advanced math through an online course, although you may consider he's just doing it for the hell of it (he hasn't mastered Calculus obviously since he did get a 4 on the BC exam.. an exam that around 40% get 5s on according to collegeboard) That's not even it though. He just acts like he's better than everyone.</p>
<p>He has like a 2340 or something SAT score, but his gpa is 3.3 UW and a 3.7 W. He is so lazy, and does his work at the last minute. He also talks back a lot in class, and is very disorganized. However, because of his high SAT score and his pretentious attitude, he is applying to Princeton, MIT, Stanford, Harvard, etc. On top of that he is writing his essay about how his mother died freshman year (which of course is sad, but has NOTHING to do with him being lazy and getting bad grades.. i know this personally, and he's admitted it).</p>
<p>Today I told him that we were doing hyperbolic trig functions in calculus and that they were hard. his response was "um rofl they're so easy."</p>
<p>So I told him he was really cocky. and that I honestly would be upset if he got into the top schools he's applying to because I don't think he deserves it. So he basically told me well I don't want you to exist but you still do and all this crap. He always says stuff like that when he doesn't like what I say even if it's honest.</p>
<p>He isn't a bad kid, but he honestly doesn't have many friends. I'm one of his closer friends, and I am bluntly honest with him sometimes. I want him to succeed, I just don't think he should get rewarded for what he does when other kids work so much harder than him. Do you think he will get into one of the top schools since he is applying to so many? The whole thing really frustrates me.. maybe I'm just a bad person for being upset about this but I really am..</p>
<p>He’s obviously not going to get into any of those schools.</p>
<p>Have you READ acceptance threads? Not going to happen.</p>
<p>Unless he’s RSI or something along those lines, but it sounds like this kid is pretty obviously not.</p>
<p>To be honest, all I can say is to not worry about it. It’s out of your control. Focus on where you are applying and do what’s best for you. If you spend your time worrying and consistently comparing yourself to others you won’t be able to focus on yourself. Perhaps he realizes his situation and compensates for it by talking about his SAT score. Some people don’t know how to react to people so they act a certain way to cover up their true feelings.</p>
<p>^Yup, Warts is definitely a girl.</p>
<p>Roses, sorry if you don’t get the reference.</p>
<p>His mom died at the start of his freshman year? I would develop an attitude like that too if it happened to me.</p>
<p>Wait, his mom died?:/</p>
<p>^ It’s not that I’m comparing myself to him. I’m not even applying to most of the schools he is because I don’t want to go there (although I am maybe reconsidering applying to Stanford and MIT… but I probably won’t if I get in ED to my first choice… we shall see… I’m actually kind of hoping i get deffered… long story. I still want to go there… just… long story yeah haha.) But yeah, it’s not that I’m comparing myself to him, I just don’t think he deserves it because I know he didn’t really work all that hard.</p>
<p>Have any of you had a friend like this?</p>
<p>^^ yes his mom died, the reach. But as I said, that seriously has nothing to do with his grades, he even told me that. He told me he’s using it in his essay as a hopes of helping him. He blatantly told me that that event did not effect his grades and that he is being lazy.</p>
<p>This kid is my friend, and he sees me as one of his closer friends. I know the problem with his mom was hard for him, but it honestly has nothing to do with the situation and he’s told me that. So there’s nothing for me to lay the f.uck off.</p>
<p>That’s fine, but again, regardless of whether he deserves it or not, it’s out of your control.</p>
<p>I’m sorry about your situation though:/ I’m sure that regardless of how he reacts, he values your friendship. I think it’s great that you are still willing to be his friend:)</p>
<p>Lol, he isn’t going to get in to top school regardless. The 3.3 UW GPA looks absolutely horrible, so personally I wouldn’t be so worried.
His cockiness and overconfidence is probably just a facade to cover up his lack of confidence in himself. So he needs to constantly feel superior to others so he doesn’t feel like a loser.
And honestly his mom dying is just a way to garner sympathy from the adcoms. But gladly, the top colleges can see through that lol.</p>
<p>Yeah, GPA-wise, he’s most likely not getting in.</p>
<p>No, he won’t get into HYPMS/similar schools with a 3.3 UW, but he’s clearly a bright kid so there will be good schools that’ll love to have him/his SAT score.</p>
<p>But really, stop feeling like he doesn’t deserve to get into a top school… just give him a break. His mom died, dude.</p>
<p>^^ yeah, there was one point at the beginning of this year where he was being a total ass to me at i hadn’t even done anything to him. he just puts me down and makes me feel stupid (most recently he said while i was having problem with calculus: “If you’re not good at calculus I don’t know why you want to be an engineer”) which of course really hurt me.</p>
<p>But yeah, at the beginning of the year i got fed up and told him i don’t need a friend like him. and after a few weeks things kind of passed. he told me he’s just a jerk to everyone and not to take it personally. that and the guys tease him about liking me, so he tries to act like a jerk so they don’t.</p>
<p>^ he is a smart kid, i do hope he succeeds, and get into a good school. But HYPMS and the like, there are so many kids that work there asses off to get into those schools and he really doesn’t deserve it by what he’s done. </p>
<p>Yes, once again, his mom did die, and I have had conversations with him about this. I do feel sad about this because obviously it’s very traumatic, but he has blatantly told me that has nothing to do with his grades and that he’s going to write about it to hopefully get him some brownie points.</p>
<p>Um, I’m sure I won’t be able to pass my classes for atleast a year if someone close to me died. I know it might seem that he says his mom dying didn’t affect his grades, and maybe on the surface he feels it doesn’t, but maybe there’s an unconscious reaction to it? When you’re faced with the “real world”, where there is death and sadness and everything, you tend to care less about an A on the next test, or a 3.3 vs a 3.5. And while I can completely empathize with you (you’re not the only one who feels like this), like Warts said, there’s nothing to do but to apply yourself to the best you can do. I’ve often felt that way about people who say, used to get higher grades than me by studying less, or the kid who gets awards every year because his mom’s a teacher. Some people have it easier, get things easier, get opportunities easier, and it’s natural to feel that’s unfair. But you know…if he’s luckier than you in test scores and can do calc easier, maybe you’re luckier than someone else who envies you for being in a position to consider applying to schools like Stanford and MIT. Just focus on yourself and your blessings. It really helps.</p>
<p>You probably don’t know what it feels like to lose your mom your freshman year. Sure, he may insist that his laziness has nothing to do with his mother’s death, but it could very well be that he is unknowingly trying to compensate his loss with this sort of “macho” attitude. Some people pity themselves when they lose somebody, others, like your friend, might try to appear stronger, and by doing so, may come across as “cocky” or annoyingly insecure. But it’s their way of dealing with their loss. I think you should let him be. It’s good to want him to succeed and to advise him that most people don’t appreciate his kind of attitude, but anybody who is aware of his loss should try to be more patient with him.</p>
<p>^ I’m pretty sure his attitude has more to do with the fact that he’s kind of in an awkward stage… he is a year younger than everyone else, and he isn’t the most attractive guy so he get’s really insecure about that, even though I tell him he’s fine. I’ve talked to him a lot about these things, trust me. I’m one of the only people he talks to about his personal life and his feelings. It just gets really frustrating when after all this he still is an ass to me every now and then when It’s not like I’ve done anything to him.</p>
<p>ok, give the guy a break
for christ’s sake, his MOTHER died freshman year. how would you feel about that?
and no one just “magically scores a 2340” out of the blue. he probably works hard, but you’re never there to see it. so don’t just judge him by how he acts in public, because in private, he may be a different person. </p>
<p>and the GPA thing, and the calculus thing, how do you know that he is now worthy? what’s wrong with him taking an online class?
what’s more annoying to me are the grade nazi kids who suck ass to their teachers to become the valedictorian. thank god sat scores knock some of these kids back down to reality and depict the extent of grade inflation. </p>
<p>if he bothers u that much, just stop talking to him</p>
<p>^ no, there is nothing wrong with his online course. It’s great. The thing is, sometimes I think he’s just doing it to impress colleges… I mean, if he really loved the material, he’d work harder at Calculus after getting a 4 on the exam (given that is still a good score). I really do believe he loves math, but he has also told me that it is to look good. </p>
<p>Yes, like I’ve said like three times now, it is a very sad thing that that happened to him, and I have had in dept conversations with him about this. The thing I think is pretty lame is that he’s using it as an excuse to colleges when he blatantly told me it has nothing to do with that and he is looking for it to help him out. I mean, if that was really a big issue for him regarding his grades, and that was a big reason impacting that, I would completely be sympathetic, I am not one to judge. I by no means am downplaying the severity of the event. What I am saying is that when he has said that isn’t correlated with his grades and he’s using it as a sob story, it frustrates me. He said he’s going to write it so it does seem like a sob story, cause he is a smart kid and is aware many colleges won’t fall for it. As for how he acts in private/ person, I have spent a lot of time with him. He lives near me, so I’ve been to his house several times. He is so lazy. Given, when he does pull things off at the last minute, he does work his butt off. Even with his online program, he is given three months and then finishes it all in the last two weeks by working a few hours everyday and then throughout all Saturday of those weekends. That’s what I mean. I know he can do it, but he’s lazy.</p>
<p>He does bother me a lot, and as I’ve said, I almost stopped being friends with him because I was so fed up with him this year. But he is a good kid at heart, and I do care about him. It’s just really frustrating sometimes.</p>