Regret my decision to come to this college? I'm so lost please help me??

<p>I feel very bad for you but suggest you tough it out for a while. My D went 3000 miles from home to a New England school in the middle of nowhere. Just like you she was very outgoing in HS and had lot of friends. When she came home for Christmas it was all tears–her mom and I were shocked as she downplayed her unhappiness from us until then. We came up with a plan to apply to transfer and if things didn’t get better she’d have that. As the term went on she made more and more friends, found her niche and when she came home for spring break she said she wasn’t going to do any transfer apps, she liked her school and was staying. So, try your best, especially with your dorm and floormates in particular but make contingency plans just in case. I know its little or no consolation but you aren’t alone and many many kids in your predicament do eventually find happiness.</p>

<p>@imsohungry: Why are you asking for help, and then lashing out rudely to the people who help you? If you don’t want help, don’t post on this forum.</p>

<p>You’ve got a bad attitude–why not go to parties by yourself? Especially if it’s a party of freshmen who don’t know each other all that well? Most college students don’t end up finding their best friends the first few weeks of college. They often get sick of hanging out with their roommates/people down the hall and start seeking out fresh faces. If you aren’t willing to take a chance than that’s your problem. Also, no sense in using the nasty tone.</p>

<p>Get over it and toughen up. You got dealt a bad hand from the start. It happens. Go out to free events on campus or in the dorms. (I just came from one that my own dorm was hosting) Talk to the people that sit around you in class. Ask them about their majors, why they’re taking the course, where they’re from, etc. Break the ice. You say you had no problem making friends before so there shouldn’t be a problem now. </p>

<p>The biggest obstacle you might meet is the simple fact that there are 3 kinds of Freshman. 1)The kid that is extremely outgoing and willing to welcome new people into his/her life. This is the kid that’ll initiate the conversation and have no problem going up to a random person and getting a conversation going. 2)The kid that sticks with the people he/she meets during orientation and the first week of school like glue. These people will become really close really quickly and if you’re not there for it you’ll probably never be part of the group. 3)The kid who is down to meet new people, but mainly hangs with the same friends he/she did in high school. These kids usually go to school’s that are in their hometown. (You’re probably going to meet a lot of the 2nd kind)</p>

<p>Whatever problem you have with going out by yourself, suck it up. You’re not gonna meet a lot of people if you’re not willing to go to an event or 2 alone. Doesn’t have to be a party, it could just be a club fair in the middle of the campus. If you have that big of a problem with it just ask your roomate if he’d mind going with you.</p>

<p>I say at least give the school a year before you decided to transfer. You can make friends anywhere so don’t transfer just because you didn’t form a crew right away.</p>

<p>What everyone else said, plus:

Can you even explain why that’s a stupid suggestion? Because it’s not. Dropping in on a party that’s open to the public/whatever demographic you happen to be part of is perfectly fine. I’ve gone to parties by myself, or where I only knew one person there, and have met a ton of interesting persons. I also go to shows by myself and meet a lot of really cool persons from around the city. The only thing any of us can tell you is to make an effort to be social and friendly, but you don’t seem to want to hear that.</p>

<p>Join a club(s) or a sports team. Guarantee you’ll make friends that way. Basically, getting involved is the key.</p>

<p>Good for you. I’m so glad that you made friends in high school. That’s wonderful, but this is college. Different period. And I’m 18, so don’t call me kid. You show no respect towards people. Well poor you. Poor, sad, little you. All alone in college, making no effort to get out there because you’re, what? Better than that? Excuse me for being rude, but when you lash at me, it just shows YOUR true colors, allowing me to call you down. That’s life. Learn how to act. I might potentially be younger than you by a few years, but it’s quite obvious I’m not sitting at home whining online about how miserable I am. I suppose I’m more mature than some of us. Granted, I’m not in college, but I’ve been in situations, and I’ve pulled through it. I get it. It’s tough. And you can sit on your high horse and down play me like my opinion doesn’t matter, but that just shows what amazing character you have. I’m not going to pretend like you’re not having a rough time right now. I’m sorry. But I don’t feel sorry for someone who moans and groans to strangers, yet doesn’t want to hear the truth. Maybe you should stop asking us what to do, and get offline and go out. I promise, you ARE capable of doing it. Go experience college. Change the attitude, and make friends. You seem to be a very negative person. And you lower yourself by disrespecting me, someone you’ve never even met. You have no right. You asked for help. Maybe you’re too mighty for my opinion, but I just think you’re too stubborn to see the truth about some things, and until you learn that… College, job, life, anything… You are going to struggle, a lot.</p>

1 Like

<p>@ChasieLooHoo</p>

<p>Nah I just don’t respect you because idc lol</p>

<p>Why do you take my comments so seriously?</p>

<p>U mad bro?</p>

<p>And again, as I’ve said before. You don’t know me. So think twice before you go around making assumptions of people you’ve never met in real life.</p>

<p>I’m calling ■■■■■. Look at old posts, what do we know? </p>

<p>A Korean Irish guy. </p>

<p>Has a 2.78 GPA and 1170 out of 2400 SAT but after a day of class in his new university says he wants a more academic environment and his class is too much like highschool. </p>

<p>Says the school is too much of a party school. But complains that at the parties he’s gone to they are so lame because they don’t even have alcohol.</p>

<p>Talks about being unable to make friends after a month. But goes out of his way to act like a royal you-know-what when folks try to offer sympathy and suggestions (quite beyond the normal kind of response you see from young people on CC).</p>

<p>The school costs him $115. </p>

<p>If you aren’t a ■■■■■ imsohungry, I apologize in advance. But I also suggest then, as an alternative, that you have some serious other stuff going on (that started well before you even arrived on this campus so its not about the school per se). That is, by your own earlier comments, you didn’t want to go to this place, it’s far away, you miss your friends, you come days late (why?)… you made up your mind before you even set foot that this wasn’t for you and you’ve managed to see what you wanted to see, and your anger/frustration/negative attitude has made it pretty self-fulfilling. </p>

<p>I think if you aren’t a ■■■■■, and you really can’t leave, then suck it up and make the best of it. What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. Find value in the experience. And work on changing your attitude and assumptions. Yes you can go to things by yourself where you will meet people. Yes you can ask to join in with existing friendship groups or start talking to people next to you in class, or ask to sit with others in the cafeteria. Yes you can find like minded others who enjoy what you enjoy. Yes you can join some great clubs and take advantage of opportunities there. You can visit the profs to find ways to get more challenge if you feel the curriculum is beneath you. </p>

<p>In other words, stop seeing yourself as a victim and take charge of the situation. Instead of complaining be proactive and strategic about it. Don’t create false barriers with ‘rules’ you think you have to follow from highschool. Why can’t you show up at a big party by yourself? What happens if you were to try to join what look like existing friendship groups? </p>

<p>What do you want from your college experience, and how can you go about getting it WHERE YOU ARE? You might try visiting the counselling service on campus if you feel stuck in answering those questions.</p>

<p>Finally I just want to mention that your harsh lashing out sounds like you have a ton of anger. Your responses on this thread really do seem more extreme than would seem warranted. Anger is often a way by which men exhibit depression. If you find yourself thinking throughout the day the way you write on CC, that might suggest you are struggling with something bigger than the campus.</p>

<p>Reported.</p>

<p>For being a stalker.</p>

<p>How did you get my gpa, race, tuition of my schools and everything hm??</p>

<p>

■■■■■■ on CC aren’t even funny anymore. :(</p>

<p>why don’t you just join a Korean association?I bet you will make 20 friends in 1 day lol</p>

<p>“U mad bro” prolly the most over used lame phrase ever.Doesn’t help when the person himself is sounding mad by typing insults and doing random reports.In other words,like the above poster said,it’s not funny :(</p>

<p>y u mad tho?</p>

<p>I like that more.</p>

<p>Funny. Hmmm…Here’s my secret…click on your name and then select “Find More Posts by imsohungry” </p>

<p>Now what are you hungry for exactly? Some good laughs? :)</p>

<p>I’m not mad. I feel sorry for your type. You don’t know me either, so you just described yourself. You’re judging me. I’m judging you by the statements you made in the thread. You obviously aren’t too bright.</p>

<p>Mods–if this guy is trolling, perhaps this discussion should not be on the front page as it does not seem to be serious.</p>

<p>^^exactly…</p>

<p>Ahh, its always nice to see that Trolls are alive and well.</p>

<p>^^^I also agree.</p>

<p>Dude - you’re fine. I agree with most of what’s been said. You’ll look back at this post in a year and laugh!</p>

<p>Starbright just clicked on your name… it can be done for everyone. If it was against the rules, that option wouldn’t be available so the admins will just laugh at your report.</p>

<p>You seem like a very troubled kid. People like you don’t really make friends, so just succeed at what you like to do. </p>

<p>Things you can do instead:

  1. Start a new World of Warcraft account.
  2. Start a new Starcraft account
  3. Wear giant hoodies when you go out alone, since it seems like you are afraid to be seen going out by yourself.
  4. Study hard every day and try to get a 4.0 since you are already going to a subpar college (based on your HS stats).</p>