<p>@esperanzax06:<br>
Had my daughter been accepted to both schools, we’d be in the same position as you. We loved Brooks. And Exeter, well, is Exeter, the best of the best.
Here is my two cents on how I would make the decision:<br>
Hopefully you can revisit each school. Visualize yourself, honestly, in the setting, with the students and the teachers you meet. See if you can “see” yourself there, and yes, depending on your background/experiences/comfort level you might need to leave a bit of room for growth and maturity to feel as comfortable at a place like Exeter versus a smaller, nurturing school like Brooks. But you do know that it only takes a short time to become familiar and comfortable with a new place. Do you like the campus? Is it appealing to you? Can you visualize yourself there next year and then in four years from now? You will be able to discern if you’ll be able to or want to adapt and get comfortable there; if you do, it will happen. The kids are great as is the faculty. Ask lots of questions about the workload and stress level, the quality of life, the amount of free time, and how easy or difficult it is to pursue your interests and EC’s. Will you have time to do the sports, clubs, or whatever you want to do? Will you be comfortable with the workload and the quality of life? How hard do you want to work, and what do you want to get out of your high school experience? Make a list of questions and bring it with you to both schools. Ask both students and faculty the same questions and see if the answers you get are in agreement (sometimes the students have a different perspective on these things than the teachers). Ask about if they provide extra help if you needed it - a school’s attitude about this will tell you something (and ask both students and teachers this one in particular!) Hopefully doing all of this will give you your answer. I would also come right our and tell the AO your two choices and ask if they have any advice for you; they, more than anyone, will know what you should be considering. (although they admitted you, so they believe you have the potential to succeed; now it becomes more of a sales job for them, because they do want their accepted students to attend, so be mindful of that) If you cannot revisit, I’d get the names of several students in different grades from each school and ask if you can call and talk to them - they should definitely be able to accommodate you with this request. Email and Facebook can help too.</p>
<p>From my family’s perspective, we know that our daughter would have had to work very, very hard to do well at Exeter. She would not have been at the top of her class, and would likely stuggle to keep up. This would mean successful academics would come only at the sacrifice of some of her interests. She might be able to handle the stress, but would she want to? We were concerned that she would be overly-taxed and decided that this would be too high a price to pay. If she were more self-confident, internally driven, mature, then it would have been a better match. I guess the admissions office felt the same way, as she was not offered a spot. In the end, we had decided that she would grow and gain more from a school where she could jump right in and participate, being happy, self-confident, and ready to take on anything. She could have the time to sing, to be in a play… She is a great student with great SSATs, but she knows herself, and she knows she just doesn’t want to work as hard as she would have to at Exeter. She wants a place where she can shine, work hard but also take advantage of some of the fabulous ECs they offer. </p>
<p>People who worry about prestige and college admissions might immediately opt for Exeter, but that was not the road we wanted to travel. We feel that a high school experience should be positive, fun, and as fulfilling as possible. Our daughter will do better academically and personally in a setting where she can excel, learn to be her best and to take chances that are not so scarey and competitive (in her mind) that she would never take them. Plus, a sense of community was very important to her. Exeter definitely has school and team spirit, don’t get me wrong. But with a larger school comes more independence and more focus on the individual versus the sense of community. That is a major difference, in our opinion. And only you can decide which is better for you. If you are still undecided, then there is probably not a right and a wrong school for you - you will excel at either one, so when you make your final decision, don’t look back! Best of luck to you, congratulations, and enjoy the excitement of investigating these two schools and doing some soul searching to make your decision! Writing down your thoughts, a pro/con sheet, might help to see the more clearly as well. And don’t make your decision based on others’ impressions of a school - this is YOUR high school experience.</p>
I was in disbelief of the opportunities that were being presented to me for a few days. I had to keep looking at the letters to remind myself that it really did happen. :)</p>