That’s why I answered as if it hadn’t been. It occurred to me as a afterthought that there might be a chance that it was.
sseamom had given that impression above but that’s not how I interpreted the op’s comments. I feel like there’s been little detail given by the OP and a lot of advice suggested based on assumptions not stated by the OP. Not directed at you, @saintfan.
I think the best advice the OP has received from the majority is seeking an outside, impartial counselor to talk to her son.
OP stated in one of her first posts that if son does not go to college that it would be the first time in 5 generations that no one from her family would be attending Middlebury. So I naturally assumed that her son was accepted to and planning to go to Middlebury until a few weeks ago.
If he isn’t completely sure of this gap plan, maybe he’s fishing for your reaction.
I’d let the kid take a gap year and live with his dad.
The mom needs to do an “eat pray love” thing for that gap year-it sounds like she needs it as much as the kid does.
It sounds like there’s more going on than senioritis. Get him talking to a trusted adult and find out what’s going on.
The problem with a gap year if the school won’t accommodate one is that he would have to start all over reapplying next fall or the gap year would stretch into two. It seems more like a recipe for Groundhog Day than a productive break. If grades have slipped at all this spring with the bout of senioritis a new process could be even more stressful.
Yes, a nice mid-life gap year sounds very rejuvenating, but I’m sure it’s a heck of a lot more relaxing when one had a nice book advance in their bank account. $-)
I think I would say “You are 18…I will help support you while you are in college, but if you are choosing not to go to college or have a structured gap year then I am assuming you are starting your life. I will let you know how much I will charge for rent. Also your portion of the phone bill is…”
@mizMfromPHL My S went through a similar situation last year. He ultimately decided to take the gap year. What was your son’s final decision?