Supporting Daughters college decision

Parents Forum
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<p>Wow no rational person would choose NEU over Rice and Vanderbilt?</p>

<p>My very rational son also chose NEU over higher ranked schools and I thought he was making a mistake-I am glad I let him chose where he wanted to go and supported his choice.</p>

<p>NEU is an excellent school- I don’t think some people posting on this thread know enough about what is going on there to make such sweeping statements.</p>

<p>It is not “elite” or “prestigious”-at least not yet. But it’s certainly an acceptable choice among those three because it has strengths and programs I haven’t seen at other schools.</p>

<p>He just finished a tremendous freshman year and can’t imagine being anywhere else that would offer everything he has found at NEU. He will be leaving soon for their Dialogue program in Rome-I don’t think any school in the country has anything like it. He will be able to do an international coop with school provided aid if he likes.</p>

<p>The opportunities, facilities, programs, advising, coop, campus, location and everything else I can think of are excellent. The student body is made up of very smart, hardworking and motivated young men and women.</p>

<p>OP if your daughter does attend I think the odds are strong she will be happy and successful there-and you will be happy because she is so happy-that has been my experience at least.</p>

<p>Good luck!</p>

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<p>I am not basing my statements just on rankings. I don’t do that. A choice of Oberlin over Penn is very understandable.</p>

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<p>NEU does indeed seem a very vibrant school with a lot to offer. It appears more pre-professional than the other two choices. For instance, in a brief survey, I noticed that the school does not offer a Classics Major. Not sure about Art History. I mention those because they were my S’s interests toward the end of college, but he went in wanting something totally different that NEU does not offer.</p>

<p>It’s a different model than Rice or Vandy. I respect those whose kids have chose NEU, the kids who choose it and those who just have the knowledge to champion its worth.</p>

<p>I think that the OP should indeed be mollified that her D will receive an excellent education with many future opportunities.</p>

<p>It’s also fair to acknowledge that the “life of the mind” or whatever we want to call a traditional liberal arts education is not NEU’s strength. Maybe this mom had those kind of dreams for her D. Is she entitled to put them on her girl? No, and she isn’t. She is just saying, “I feel sad. Help me to feel better.”</p>

<p>There’s nothing wrong with that.</p>

<p>Those who supported this decision wholeheartedly were lucky.</p>

<p>I was iffy on S’s decision although I loved the school because I thought the rigor might be too difficult for him. I was wrong about that, but he did run into some academic difficulties, mostly through choice of major. I’ll never know if working all that through was the making of him or just an unnecessary bump in the road.</p>

<p>Parents do have to trust their kids, but sometimes we feel sad about their choices and would have made different ones if it had been us. This is true for school, profession, mate, etc. It’s human to sometimes feel a little sad about it if the picture the kid has doesn’t match up to the picture the parent has.</p>

<p>And then, as everyone has said, it’s time to move on and support the young person.</p>

<p>And thank you all who have pointed out the really great things about NEU.</p>

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<p>“Wow no rational person would choose NEU over Rice and Vanderbilt?” - hmmm</p>

<p>IMO, our educational systems have to change…if a young person chooses a classics based education, it is likely that they will have to continue to pursue an advanced degree to enter the professional workforce. With today’s economy and the competition for entry-level jobs, the few open positions are going to go to the kid that has the most relevant experience. It doesn’t matter whether they get that through internships, coops, service learning or study abroad programs. There is nothing wrong with a liberal arts/classics based education, it is but one path. </p>

<p>Second, we live in a global world. Kids that do not understand that will be at a disadvantage upon graduation. Studying ancient Greek history in Greece is great but if the teachings are not applied to today’s world the critical thinking piece is missing. </p>

<p>IMO, the best programs combine all of it - classics, cultural immersion, and pre-professional with study abroad. My D11 just finished her freshman year at NEU and has a fabulous opportunity to study abroad similar to Pepper03’s son. She is leaving for Spain in a couple of weeks for a cultural immersion, Intro to international business and ethics as well as how Spanish history and society has helped form Europe’s business climate…a mix of everything. They will tour two major business (large Spanish winery and ABC News Room) as well as visit many cultural sites/museums/cathedrals as part of the program. This is what NEU excels at. Putting all the pieces together in context of the global perspective so that when the students graduate they don’t necessarily get the entry level jobs, they get the next step up. Different type of education than classics/liberal arts but it is another path. IMO, this is the path of the future…many of the other schools just haven’t got there yet.</p>

<p>My D11 was accepted into every school she applied to, many of which were “ranked” higher than NEU. I was surprised and quite frankly shocked when she chose NEU. But I know why she chose them. She told me that they were the only school at accepted student’s day that talked about global perspective and provided a clear path with lots of options to enter the workforce. When she graduated HS, she wasn’t interested at that point in eight more years of school to get into the work force.</p>

<p>I am a business owner and I hire all types of people. Frankly, I don’t care where they went to school or what level degree they have. Some of the most qualified people on paper are the least desirable employees. I specifically look for what have they done, what are they involved in and what are the candidate’s values. If it matches what I am looking for, I hire them. It is very simple. I have people that work for me that have first class educations - Ivy, top business schools. I have people that struggled to get through their local state university. My stand out star by far is a woman that worked five jobs to go to her local state university. She just “has it.” She earns more than the people with the “better education” because she is the best at what she does. So, what really matters is what you do with your education…not necessarily where you got it.</p>

<p>So, to the original OP, trust your kid. They have entered the college admissions process with an unbiased perspective as compared to all of us parents that went to school 20+ years ago. The world is different today…we are now playing on a global scale…and she will easily get that education at NEU. And have fun in Boston!</p>

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<p>I agree with you about Rice but not Vanderbilt. I also think ones view of Northeastern (& Vanderbilt, for that matter), depend a lot on where one lives. Plus, NEU and Vandy are so different, I think it’s actually quite difficult to compare the two. </p>

<p>My son turned down Brandeis, UT Austin, and George Washington to attend NEU. It’s a great school that is only getting better. My pride in having a son there is not at all dimished by the fact that most people where we live (south Texas) have never even heard of NEU. Like I said, I think geography plays a big part in how one percieves many colleges.</p>

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<p>Northeastern is a very different school and would appeal to many kids who don’t want the traditional experience. Two of mine looked into it seriously, for that reason, and did not even look at RIce or Vandy or any such schools. Two of my kids also were in a mode where a traditional type of curriculum would have been a high risk for failure. They were tired of it and wanted something truly different.</p>

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<p>I agree that geography plays a big part in how you might view these schools. Vanderbilt is not what it was 10 years or even 5 years ago. It has become more selective than Duke. When I lived in Texas I did not appreciate how incredible it is. Having spent the last 6 years in Nashville and having a kid who got a Master’s there and a son in law who is a doctor there has really opened my eyes. Add SEC sports, the best city there is and it just doesn’t get much better. </p>

<p>I just hope the OP’s daughter likes Boston. Not everyone from the south does. I grew up in the northeast and couldn’t be paid enough to live north of Virginia. We all see things differently.</p>

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<p>I’m OP- Daughter very calmly told me “Mom, I’ve worked hard to have these colleges as choices. I’ve chosen NEU because it is where I think I belong & will be happy. I need for you to be happy for me!” </p>

<p>It’s her life, education and future. She has a track record of being responsible and mature. She wrote a letter explaining all of her reasons for selecting NEU and deserves us supporting her decision. </p>

<p>We’ve sent in the deposit and soon we’ll be trekking up to Boston. While I doubt I can find any decent Mexican food, I’m certain I can find some great clam chowder:)</p>

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<p>TCM, You are wise to stay away from the Mexican food in Boston! </p>

<p>Congratulations to your daughter and to your family! No matter which college is chosen in the end, it is an exciting time and I wish you all the very best.</p>

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<p>The OPs daughter has to love Boston for the four years she is in college…not forever. Our kid went to CA from the northeast for college. She LOVED it for the four years she was there, but has told us she has no intention of ever living in CA. BUT she did love the change from the northeast where she grew up.</p>

<p>As I’ve said (and maybe said upstream on this thread)…college is a wonderful time to go to a different part of the country. NEU is a fine college in a wonderful city with plenty of college students and MUCH to do. And for sports…well there are the Red Sox, the Celtic, the Bruins and the Patriots (ok…they aren’t IN Boston)…for the diehard fans. </p>

<p>I grew up in the midwest and you couldn’t pay me to live there now…but that doesn’t mean I would tell kids NOT to consider Case Western, or Oberlin, or Ohio State. </p>

<p>Just for the record…I LOVE Nashville and tried VERY hard to get my son to apply to Vandy…it was a no go for him…never did figure out why.</p>

<p>Congratulations to the OPs daughter. Sounds like she put a lot of thought into her decision!</p>

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<p>Congratulations TexasCollegeMom! NEU sounds like a great school and Boston is an exciting college town. The fact that you have allowed her to choose will add to the positivity of her experience. I felt my son had to learn a lot about himself in order to make his college choice. Sounds like your daughter put a lot into this decision. Now it’s time to celebrate!</p>

<p>Yes, you will find great clam chowder. I don’t know of good Mexican in Boston, but there might be. I’ve found good Mexican in Maine and I’ve lived in AZ and traveled in Mexico, so I do know the difference.</p>

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<p>FYI - it’s chowda…;-)</p>

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<p>MomofWildChild,</p>

<p>And not everyone likes the south as much as you do. I have lived in Nashville and spent a lot of time in Boston and would MUCH prefer to live in Boston myself, although I didn’t dislike Nashville. I wouldn’t even consider Houston due to the geography, climate and culture. But this isn’t about me, or you.</p>

<p>The point is–for our own kids and those of others, we can’t see the world through their lenses. TexasCollegeMom’s daughter is choosing to go to college in one of the most college-centric, intellectual cities in the country. She will meet people with very different backgrounds and perspectives. She will get to experience four seasons and survive a few nor’easters. She will discover things on her own, not with her parents on the other end of the leash. And she has come to her decision with logic, grace, maturity, and the confidence to defend it. I wish her luck.</p>

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<p>I understand that. We all have our opinions and our lenses. I’m sure the OP’s daughter will enjoy Boston.</p>

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<p>TCM - goodluck to your daughter. I was asking the same questions I asked my daughter yesterday about why and what is specific to the college that is good for her in the college she is choosing. As long she has an education plan specific to the college, she should do well.</p>

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<p>The only one who knows where she will be happy is OP’s daughter. We can all speculate on which is a better school, or where she may get a better education, but if she doens’t love it ( or at least like it ) there, she won’t be happy. Of course we all want our kids to make the right choice, but what we think is the right decision, is not always the best one. Whenever H and I disagree about some life choice one of our kids has made, he is fond of telling me, “We are living our lives the way we want, time to let them live theirs the way they want!” Sounds like OP’s daughter is very excited about her decision to attend NEU, and OP is correct in supporting her decision. Their relationship will be all the better for it.</p>

<p>And yes, TCM, you will find great chowder in Boston, but also the most fabulous Italian food I have ever eaten in the North End. Good luck to your daughter on her adventure in Boston!</p>

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<p>My son went to Northeastern mainly to be in Boston. He loved being in Boston, but he has had some great co-ops. He is student teaching in Italy right now and having a blast. In fact he is meeting his best friend from high school in Rome today… a recent Vanderbilt grad. Then he will meet his parents in Naples… on Friday!!</p>