Talent vs. Motivation Essay

<p>Can someone please read my essay on talent vs. motivation and score it according to SAT scoring guidelines? Also if you could give me an explanation on why I got that score and how to improve, that would be amazing. As this was a practice, I took as much time as needed and the total came to about 34 minutes. could someone please tell me a way to cut down that time? Thank you so much...</p>

<p>Prompt: If you want to become an expert in a certain field, do you need to have more talent or more motivation?</p>

<p>My essay:</p>

<p>Today we live in a world where many countries have nuclear weapons. How did nukes become so popular with so many countries? They had a demonstration of the power of nukes when the USA decided to bomb Japan and end World War II. How did nukes first come into existence? The USA first invented them because of motivation to end WWII. After that, they were the world’s first nuclear power and remain the world’s lone superpower. After reading this essay, you will be left with no doubt in your mind the motivation is far more important than talent can and will ever be to get to the top of any field. While those who have talent only are likely to quit when they find something they believe is impossible, people with enough motivation will never quit come hell or high water. Motivation is the key to some of the world’s most well known achievement s, and also some of the world’s necessary evils.
People with talent alone have a greater chance of quitting when they believe something is impossible. My friend and I both used to play soccer from 1st through 5th grade. When we were in fifth grade, we both had the same level of talent on the field. However, when we got moved up from Division 3 to Division 2, I realized how much work would have to be put into soccer to make it to the top. I quit. My friend, on the other hand, had a goal to make it to varsity soccer and was motivated by that goal. No matter how hard it got, he stuck to it and he realized his goal of playing for varsity. In this case motivation sprung from the need for glory, recognition and honor. However that may not always be the case.
The Ancient Egyptians are widely known for their architecture. When you read Ancient Egyptians, you probably almost instantly thought of the pyramids. The Egyptians take pride in the fruits of their slaves’ labor. But why did the slaves work in the first place? They were motivated by fear and hunger. Fear of what would happen to them if they didn’t work. They also did not have any other means of earning money or food in the famine-torn Egypt, and would get food only when they worked on the pyramids. As a result, Egypt is now well-known for their pyramids.
On the 6th of August, 1945, the world’s first atom bomb was dropped on Hiroshima, concluding WWII. The entire city was destroyed and the effects are visible even today. In today’s world, this is considered a necessary evil because it ended WWII for good. The atom bomb was first built because the US Military was motivated to quickly end the war and for this reason lit a fire under the scientist to get them working. Motivation lead to action which produced results, which the scientists’ talent alone might not have produced so quickly.
Some may say that to truly get to the top, you need to have both talent and motivation. This is not true however. Having talent will only cut down the amount of work needed to get to the top. Even if you don’t have talent, it is possible to get to the top by pure hard work. True you may need more hard work but it can be done.
In conclusion, I believe motivation is far more important than talent to get to the top of any chosen field. People who are motivated are less likely to give up than people with just talent. Motivation drives action, constructive or destructive, depending on the circumstances. The next time you think of starting something, ask yourself if you are truly motivated or are you just going to end up giving up when it gets tough?</p>

<p>atleast 10/12, because of length…I’m too lazy to read (so are graders).</p>

<p>I wouldn’t say a 12.</p>

<p>the Intro and the conclusion is way too long. they only need to be 2-3 sentences. Any more would be just padding.
Plus, rhetorical questions should be avoided.</p>

<p>btw, can you even fit all of that in just two pages?</p>

<p>So true… But a quick look-over of quality is enough to say this is not near a ten… (“nukes”+ why in god’s name are you talking that much crap in your introduction+“necessary evil” are you f******* kidding me? never seen anything more unnecessary)
If anyone other than a patriotic c*** read this he would refuse to mark it.</p>

<p>9 or 10. It was well-written but the organization and content seems a little off.</p>