<p>This weekend has seemed to really bring out my loneliness and hopelessness and slight depression. I'm trying my best to stay positive and keep hoping that I will make some friends I can hangout with on the weekend. </p>
<p>I've been at school for just over a month now and I still haven't made a group of friends I can do things with on the weekends. It seems the people I am friendly with either go home or just don't invite me out anywhere because they are doing things with other friends. I text them here and there, hint that I'm not really doing anything and am friendly. But, still no invitations to do anything. It makes me feel bad about myself. Maybe I'm not capable of making good friends. </p>
<p>I have no roommate this year because I opted not to have one since I had a terrible experience at my last school. The people on my floor are okay but I wouldn't say I am friends with them. I don't really have much in common with any of them. We say hello and how are you in the hallways and that's about it. </p>
<p>This campus doesn't really have much going on during the weekends, it seems. At least not this weekend. You either party or you go home....and since I have no one to go with to parties and can't go home I spend my weekends sitting in my room. I guess finally it's taking its toll. </p>
<p>I've joined a few clubs but didn't really meet anyone in them. I mean, they've only just started so I'll give it some time. I just don't know what else to do at this point. I told my parents I am much happier here than I was at my old school and I won't transfer again.</p>
<p>I’d give the clubs you joined more time, for more meetings and everything. </p>
<p>I wouldn’t be worried too much about making friends. Some people go through college with all the friends in the world and others not so much. I’d be more worried about my grades and being an all around good student.</p>
<p>If you see somebody on your floor who looks particularly friendly, when they say hi, ask if they maybe want to grab lunch sometime. If your school has a cafeteria, try introducing yourself to people sitting alone there, or groups where you know a person or two, and ask if you can sit with them. Both of these take courage, but they’re both how more extroverted people tend to meet their friends. Especially in the beginnings of school, they’re normal!</p>
<p>And as for your clubs, do you have any interests that are likely to attract people who don’t like going to parties? Science fiction clubs tend to be great havens for this, e.g.; people who like watching movies or running treasure hunts or whatever tend to congregate there. The chemistry club or the Christian group rather than the club basketball team or the investing club. Whatever. If you’re in those sorts of things already, ask what they’re up to on the weekend! If it sounds fun, maybe they’ll ask you to join. People can assume, if you’re never like “oh what are you doing this weekend,” that you already have plans. If you ask, they’re more likely to include you. (This question only works on Thursdays and Fridays, admittedly.) Or maybe join clubs that require significant time on your weekends–debate, ballroom dancing, MUN, the marching band, etc. None of these are one plan, just suggestions so that maybe a couple will seem like good ideas.</p>
<p>I think everyone someone envisions that they are going to immediately fall in with a great group of friends and have an active social life in college… but it definitely does not always go that way! Especially if you are a transfer student living in a single (that is how it sounds to me). It is tough to break into some of those groups that have already formed. It sounds like you may be at a bit of a “suitcase U” where a lot of kids leave for the weekend, too. So… some thoughts.</p>
<ul>
<li>I completely agree with the club suggestions. Also, if you have a chance to join study groups as part of your classes or department, do that. It is also a good way to meet people.</li>
<li>If you see someone sitting alone in the cafeteria, sit down and strike up a conversation. There are probably some other students in the same situation you are in. Or sometimes something happens to their social group mid year (eg, a breakup… when I broke up with my boyfriend in college, I had no one to eat with… would have been happy to see a friendly face!).</li>
<li>Keep working on social stuff during the week (coffee, eating together, do anything your dorm hall plans, etc.). If a lot of people are going home over the weekend, maybe during the week is just when you will have your social life… then you can study on the weekends and spend a lot of time at clubs or socializing during the week if that is how it works out. And you might as well get k<em>*a</em> grades during this window of building your social life, too. :)</li>
<li>Consider changing your living situation. Instead of a single room, maybe see if you can move to some kind of special interest housing or something. Often the semester break offers some openings in various student housing options because of students going abroad. I am not advocating getting a roommate (that can be good or bad, but could help…), more moving to someplace like a foreign language or special interest house of some kind if they exist.</li>
<li>You may not be too keen on Greek life (if it exists there), but that is another choice. Or look into service fraternities/sororities (often do not have houses, but have regular events to do service activities). Sometimes they are co-ed, too.</li>
<li>It does sound from your post like you are making some “during the week” friends. Rather than hinting around at being invited, maybe you should invite them to do something. They could say no (gone, other plans). But they could say yes…</li>
<li>Try leaving your dorm room door open, maybe playing some music. Have something that smells good, too (fresh popcorn?). If people stick their head in, invite them to have some. Start a game of cards or something… that is how I got to know people in my dorm is playing cards in college. And I lived with an upperclassman whose two best upperclass friends lived right next door, and we were on the end of a hall. So I struggled to make friends, too.</li>
<li>If you know anyone from high school at your college, contact them and make plans on the weekend. If they already have plans, invite yourself along. I met some of my best friends from college through high school friends who knew them. My HS friend “George” met “Diana” at orientation, introduced her to me, and we are still tight friends 30 years later – while George is long gone. :)</li>
</ul>