Since you’ve had a ongoing issues with making friends and socializing with others, I also want to suggest you talk to the college counseling office. Perhaps they can give you tips on forming friendships and on social cues as some of the behavior you have expressed here crosses those boundaries.
Note that this is the same poster who wanted to fix his roommate’s “social issues.” To me, on that thread, it read as overbearing. Now even more so.
Thank you for the advice. I already speak to a counselor once a week about how I’m doing academically and socially. in college. I’m actually doing pretty well socially right about now, better than in high school. I just made a few mistakes along the way. Yes, I did have some negative past experiences with the opposite sex.
My past behaviors were wrong and I learned from most of them. I will now work on my current issues.
@sta3535 Well I didn’t insult you in way. Have I called you any names? I was being honest about your behavior and how it is likely to be perceived. You’ll probably misunderstand this, but I am finding this conversation too aggressive and overreacting. And I have an anonymous internet between us. If this was a face to face conversation, my reaction would be much worse.
@sta3535 You post ^^^ has a much better attitude than your previous ones, and I think with this type of response, it will bring you much more happy life down the road. So why not just move on and learn from the mistakes and not to do that again, instead of trying to fix. In a long run, be calm and helpful, people will change their opinion about you. Good luck to you!
In college you will meet students from diverse backgrounds that may not think or have the same beliefs that you do. That doesn’t mean that something is wrong with them necessarily. You can’t control how people react to you or in a certain situation. You only have control of your own behavior and how your perceive things. We may not realize sometimes that our own behaviors are to blame for the negative experiences we have with others. Don’t take things personally or hold grudges. Don’t dwell on the situation. Just move on. You have so many students in your school that you have yet to meet. Focus on activities that you enjoy and you will meet people who you may better connect with. When else will you be surrounded by so many people of your own age group? Focus on doing well in your classes and take time to meet people and be engaged in your college community to make the most of this experience.
Utilize your time in college to develop strong people skills so that you come across as someone that is approachable and easy to get along with. You don’t want to be the person that constantly finds faults in others and is always finding reasons to complain. Don’t give unsolicited advise to others on how to live their life. Take each encounter you have as a learning opportunity. Ask people questions to show you are interested in them and be a good listener. Don’t put on a show. Just be real.
When you start looking for internships and jobs in the future, having strong social and interpersonal skills will help you a lot in your career. Being a team player and being able to get along with coworkers and clients even if you have differences of opinion is important. You want a potential employer to feel you are a good fit with their corporate culture.
The person you are just out of high school and starting college is not going to be the same person that walks across the stage to get their diploma. The four years of college and all your experiences will transition you to an adult that is confident, independent, responsible, and a person capable of making good decisions for themselves.
Learn from this experience and move on. Look for opportunities to meet new people.
My point was to encourage you not to discourage you.
you will forever be known as guy-who-slips-weird-creepy-notes-under-girls’-doors
Maybe a social skills class would be helpful? Maybe they have them through the counseling center?
One thing about college is that the friendship/acquaintanceship can be as volatile as high school friends. Even people whom you talk to for group projects may not talk to you after the course completion. Don’t bother with people who clearly dismiss you.