Waiting, waiting, waiting!

College Majors Theater/Drama Majors
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<p>It seems like the waiting is harder for me than for my DD. She is busy-busy-busy, as always, with spring musical, winter dance, Drama Club, homework, friends-boyfriend, looking for a summer job, etc., etc. It is almost as if college admissions is just an aside to her very full senior year. </p>

<p>For me, I can't stop thinking about it! Where will she be accepted? Did she apply to the right schools? Will it be too far from home? Will we be able to afford it? Will she be happy? Will she get to study what she wants to study? Are we going to miss the boat on housing? Will she be OK flying on her own? Will she be OK at a BA school if a BFA doesn't come through? Will she double major?.......and on and on. And on.</p>

<p>Meanwhile, DH seems unwilling to discuss any of it until all of the offers are on the table.</p>

<p>What are the dynamics of your family's wait?</p>

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<p>skewlcounselor–you must be living my parallel life! My D is also so busy and occupied that she doesn’t even seem to be anxious. With the first acceptance today I finally saw a spark in her. I think she has been too afraid to hope. She keeps saying she can’t believe it. We’ve been preparing for no acceptances, just in case. She has no non-audition schools chosen, but was planning to stay home a year and rethink her plans if that happened. </p>

<p>All of your questions are exactly mine–so weird. An extra one for me is How will her brother handle her leaving? They’re 12 months apart and best friends? How homesick will she be? How will we make decisions–what she loves most or where the scholarships are biggest or where she’s closer to home or, or, or?! She asked tonight, “What if I go somewhere and I don’t like it?” and that’s a scary question after all of this hard work. </p>

<p>I can’t stop thinking about all of this, and I see so many parents on here trying to evaluate every little detail, trying to “predict”–trying to somehow feel like they have control over something in this process, and it makes me feel better to know that I’m not the only one that’s a freak! Ha! Ha! I’ve thought about this so much for a year, done so much research, read so many forums, that now I feel like I’m watching it all from outside my body. Are we finally at this point? It’s so hard to believe. Is my little girl really going to be moving away in six months? And will we really know exactly where in just less than two months? It’s surreal. My husband and I are so excited this week finally having the auditions done and the financial aid applications in that we haven’t had time to process what we’re really talking about. The biggest change in 18 years. Tonight we sat down and started planning an impromptu trip to several colleges; she can’t make a decision without visiting, and even with the visits it will be difficult if she actually is invited into more than one.</p>

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<p>I agree with both of you. My job seems to be to put on a positive face and encourage her when those fleeting moments where she thinks about those March/April decisions. She is wonderfully fortunate to have acceptances, I am know that has really helped her. </p>

<p>I, of course, take it to the next level and start looking at all the dollar signs. Some schools have already provided merit scholarships - that gives me a starting ball park. I know that we should be receiving financial packages from some this next month. My biggest prayer is that when all is said and done we are able to afford the one school that she really wants to go to. I did make sure that we have a financial safety that she would be very happy to attend. </p>

<p>I am happy to be able to voice these little voices to a crowd that understands! This is actually a great board that I feel has improved my understanding of the processes and definately improved my daughter’s options through knowledge.</p>

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<p>This is a stressful time in a different way…my son was cuddled in my bed looking at the professors at the schools he was waiting to hear from. I kept saying to him how about the schools you are already in? Look at theirs…but no! Thankfully, he has two rehearsals to go to today so he will have something to take his mind off the 2 schools he is waiting to hear from.</p>

<p>I just want to say how much I appreciate all the support given on this site. You parents are wonderful, wise and caring. Thank you. I appreciate those who stay around to give guidance as much as the current parents who are going through this with us. And you future parents…we will be there for you too!!!</p>

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<p>@MT: I, too, am concerned about finances. Yesterday I realized the average rise in tuition per year at one of the schools she is gunning for is 4%. Plus, the upper class housing is in apartments and that is more expensive, too. At that school, by Year 4, it will likely be $9500 more per year than her initial year. Thats a lotta cashola! The merit scholarships are nice, but they do not increase each year. That’s one reason I am rooting for the state schools because they freeze tuition for four years.</p>

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<p>Wasn’t sure which thread to put this on but this one seemed more anxious!</p>

<p>It may be time for me to say what I have said for the past four years; although I’m certain I’ll be typing this at least one more time this year.</p>

<p>It all works out, one way or another, it all works out. The schools know what they are looking for and, more importantly, what they are not looking for. They can tell pretty quickly if your child is a match for their program or not a match for their program. Remember: acceptance or rejection has little to do with your child’s skill and ability, today or in the future. If your child is rejected from all audition schools and winds up in a non-audition school he/she will be very happy by the end of their first month there. He/She will wonder why he/she ever had any interest in any other school. Some may even switch majors (!) before their junior year once they see the difference between acting “for fun” and acting “for career.” Or once they become exposed to other areas or kids. Some may grow and develop in acting like they never thought they would (regardless of their college), some go from character actor to leading actor or vice versa.</p>

<p>Whatever happens, life is not over at 18 if they don’t get into their “top choice.” No school is perfect, not even their favorite. If they’ve chosen wisely, they will get into a fabulous school and they will become the best they can be for the future they desire, whatever that future winds up being. EVERY school has so much to offer your child, 99.8% of these current high school seniors will be very happy for the next four years.</p>

<p>Just breathe, it will all work out, one way or another.</p>

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<p>skewlcounselor and ResrchMom-I am right there with you. I feel like I’m getting an ulcer worrying about all of this. Most everywhere she has applied does not give answers until mid March. We have one no from a January audition but nothing from anywhere else-I guess no news is good news and she may still be in the mix. I just want one “yes” from a school on her list-so I can breathe and know she will be somewhere in the fall. There really was only one school she no longer liked after Unifieds-she didn’t click with the faculty that were at Chicago. She does not want to pursue a BA and when we start to talk about what if there are no acceptances what will we do-she wants to take a gap year at this point. She is so busy and is waaaay more laid back about all of his than me. She did her best-and is not disappointed in any of her auditions so its out of her hands-glad she has that philosphy. Wish I could do that but it’s not my personality type. It does help to know others are out there going through the same thing. Best of luck to your kids and may the acceptances come soon!</p>

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<p>broadway95 and all-- I’ve watched this thread for years, once I realized D was headed in this direction. And in that time I have seen several who did not get into any auditioned program, took a gap year and re-applied. Most if not all of those had several GREAT choices the next time. Don’t worry too much and don’t take these results as more meaningful than they are. These kids work with such passion and dedication and they deserve the education they’re looking for…most of them will find a great place. (Worst case scenario is that they’ll have to wait a year.)</p>

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<p>Just to add another voice to the chorus, we dads are just as stressed (and in my family, I’m by far the most stressed on this). Like several of the other posters, we have no non-audition safety on this list, and no acceptance yet in hand. Plan B is a gap year of work, training and trying to get some paid acting work (if possible), and then reapply. I also wouldn’t mind another year of getting ready financially (CMU just sent their fee schedule - $62,000). Although we’ve got this totally acceptable backup plan, my 18 year old son is ready to move out, and, although we are very close, it really feels like time for him to leave the nest, so Plan B is still far less desirable than an acceptance. The choice to have no non-audition safeties was, I believe, the best decision for us, but it raises the stakes during this difficult waiting period.</p>

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<p>To be honest, I am not worried about my D getting “in.” I know, just as my daughter inherently knows, that it will all work out. My D does have good BA options where she has been accepted, as well as a financial safety. I guess I am just not used to uncertainty over such a long period of time. </p>

<p>With the exception of one school, every school my D is considering is a plane ride away. Every school/environment/opportunity is very, very different. However, just the fact that she is not stressed about the outcome makes me realize that she is truly ready for this adventure wherever it may take her. Maybe I should take her lead!!!</p>

<p>Back in the day, sometime in my senior year when I decided I wanted to attend college, I was told that I had to take a “college admissions test.” It was the ACT and it was the first I had heard of it. I took the test, applied to the state school where my boyfriend attended, and that was that! My how times have changed!</p>

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<p>I’m on the S.S. Financial Anxiety as well. I find it hard to get excited about any acceptances because I just don’t know whether or not I will be able to actually afford them. It’s also been particularly stressful in terms of getting partial acceptances: an artistic acceptance from a walk-in which means applying rolling admission academically and missing scholarship deadlines… or academic acceptance and the painstaking wait or callback process… either way it’s going to be a rough wait.</p>

<p>My parents are managing much better than I am though. They are sort of just waiting to see where this all goes and were thrilled (and honestly, I think a little surprised) at my artistic acceptance, so that’s holding them over for now. Although, I think this whole audition process has left them a little rattled – neither of them are involved in the arts and they had no clue what would be involved in this whole crazy ride. I think it will probably hit them in a week or so after everything calms down.</p>

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<p>Uncertainty over a long period of time. Knowing that something wonderful is probably going to happen, but there are no guarantees. In a couple of months so much will be different
It’s a bit like…being pregnant!</p>

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<p>NJTheatreMOM - you’re right. And it will cost about as much in the end! ;)</p>

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<p>So glad there are so many of us who feel the same way. My only wish is for one acceptance to come early on, so that we can all breathe. My S has three rejections, so far, from three schools he really liked, so now we are on pins and needles. No safety school, no non-audition programs waiting in the wings, so we are out there on a limb with so many of the rest of you. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe. All will be well. Right?</p>

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<p>Phew… on a day with 2 rejections, my S got accepted into Ithaca’s Acting program. We were in the “no safety school with a gap year as backup” camp, so we are of course very happy. Hang in there everyone… </p>

<p>All the rest at this point will likely be late March notifications, but it really is better with one in hand.</p>

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<p>I think the process produces PTSD in the parents–and just visiting this forum helps me recover from a very demanding year of applications for Theatre BFAs for my S2 two years ago. </p>

<p>I really can commiserate with so many posting here in that there are hurdles on top of hurdles for our kids. First, figuring out which schools are desired, then the gauntlet of auditions/interviews, then the waiting for results, all culminating in—can we afford it? Oh man. To share my own painful memory, my son was unexpectedly (and what a wonderful day it was!) admitted on the spot at L.A. unifieds to CMU BFA/Design. It was beyond a wild dream to him, and yet… he/we had no idea if we would be able to afford to send him. FinAid gets sent with regular admissions and that was over 2 months away. Imagine, oh fellow anxious parents, having your kid admitted to one of his tippiest top choices, and yet… chances were good he couldn’t afford to go and we had months to wait until we would know if he had any other acceptances. Add to that–my son had only 2 top choices, and the rest of his list (10 more schools) he felt were meh at best. I always admire the flexibility of many CC kids who can love all their choices, but that was not my very specific, very detail minded guy. Now I, his mom, liked 3 of his other applied to schools quite a lot, but he wasn’t admitted yet so I was befuddled if I should be singing their praises quite yet. So… I get your mixed feelings, questions, and frustrations. </p>

<p>But I must admire the post above by amtc who is really right. Everything does work out really well in the end. In my son’s case, it turned out he did not get sufficient $$ from CMU. That, in itself, was rather a huge bombshell as we, as a family, had to be realistic about how much money we could spend. There is such a strong desire to give our kids everything and more that we hated to be the ones to burst a dream. OTOH (see amtc’s post!!), he was admitted literally to every other school he applied. It was really crazy. And while my S was still lukewarm to several choices, he did (hooray!) get into his other top fit/dream school and they offered him merit scholarships and made it possible for him to attend.</p>

<p>It’s like you are all living in the part of the play just before the climax, where anything can happen and the suspense is at its highest.</p>

<p>Next year (or the year after that), you’ll be like I am, joining in the conversation to soothe the nerves of parents to follow. My son is so glad things turned out the way they did. He is double majoring in theatre and also film and has had incredible internships/work on films, too. And yet, I know he would have loved CMU too. And probably most of the other great colleges he got into as well!! </p>

<p>Sending calming thoughts…</p>

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<p>Congrats fourkorz-how was your S notified? We are like you gap year as backup…hoping for that one so we can breathe while waiting for the late March notifications</p>

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<p>While my D has had several acceptances, we still have to wait on others. I think she has come to a place where she can see herself being happy at any of the schools that remain on her list. That is a relief for me for a couple of reasons. Her rejection to CMU was pretty hard on her because she was CRAZY about the program. Then, she fell hard for CCU. She does know that the bottom line on all of this is the financial package. I’m glad she is making an effort to keep it all in perspective and know that she will be good anywhere she lands. The waiting is intense, though!</p>

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<p>I agree ugadog, even with acceptances, the waiting is still hard. There are two he is waiting to hear from and then we have to figure out quick visits and make a decision.</p>

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<p>Congrats, fourkorz. My daughter really like Ithaca. Had I know Ithaca did rolling admissions for some, we would have moved it up earlier. My daughter auditioned on 2/16. When did your son audition?</p>