<p>Today's Washington Post Outlook (editorial) section had an interesting article "Spiraling Out of Control" which mostly talked about college admissions and resume building. If you're interested, here is the link.</p>
<p>Good column...her book sounds interesting, too.</p>
<p>Other than some last-minute nagging to get essays finished, it wasn't all that that bad, though we're certainly glad it's over with :). I didn't enjoy all the hourse of driving, but the college visits themselves were interesting, and I really enjoyed hearing son's views on the places we saw. He had a good idea of what he was looking for, and didn't need a lot of hovering.</p>
<p>Our kids are in public school here on Long Island, and I don't know of any parents in S's class who have gotten carried away with the college process. I've run into one or two who seem to have pegged "what it takes" ("if you want to get into the Ivies, you'd better do crew!") but they are definitely the exception. I think it helps that we are lucky enough to have an experienced and caring guidance counselor who the parents and kids trust. He'll be missed terribly when he retires.</p>
<p>If anything, I'd say that all the articles and news stories on the horrors of college admissions made it seem MUCH WORSE than it really was, and I would advise parents of younger high schoolers not to be intimidated.</p>
<p>lspf- I think the college frenzy days in the metro NY area were more evident about 5 or more years ago. I think we Ny'rs were forced into reality that there were just too many Long Island (I'm from that area too) and metro NY kids applying to the same NE schools and we were just being closed out of those schools. The "smart folks" started looking west or south or just a bit beyond our NE comfort zone. I know more kids applying to U Mich, Wisconsin, Grinnell and other like schools. And by expanding on the group of schools to apply to, our kids have benefitted and actually have had more choices than before.
Being on these boards for the past few years, (D # 1 is now a Junior and I am now checking out the Law School thread), I am finding the NY parents seem to be the most "calm" and realistic with this admission process.<br>
This is probably my "last Admission" cycle following these boards. I don't think I have the temperment or patience to go through it again.<br>
All in all, it really wasn't that bad an experience for my Long Island kids either.</p>
<p>marny - think you are right. Our HS is small, and the majority attend SUNY's and schools close to home, but this year's class already has kids heading west to Rice, Chicago, Northwestern, Wisconsin and a few to Indiana.</p>
<p>I particularly liked this"
[quote]
Something had to give, and travel soccer was among the earliest casualties: In what felt like a true moment of reckoning, I sat my kids down and explained that while there was much that this family could provide in the way of support, love and even some of the finer luxuries of life, a ride up and down the Pennsylvania Turnpike on Sunday mornings was not on offer.
[/quote]
</p>
<p>I remember a similar day quite well...</p>
<p>Tell the females coming to Wisconsin not to bring their Uggs. I think they're boots. For reasons that escapes me it seems to offend some of the students from Wisconsin. Uggs apparently identifies the wearers as "coasties." </p>
<p>I can't tell the difference between one jean-wearing student and another as to place of origin but apparently the students can. Note though this is mostly seen as a joke.</p>
<p>Heck with everyone dressed from top to bottom in cold-weather gear its hard to tell one sex from the other.</p>
<p>tsdad- It'll be more than the Uggs that will be a giveaway- That NY/ Long Island accent will be evident the moment our kids start talking (and don't get me started on pocketbooks) .</p>
<p>Please, "those upstate" (and I'm talking my fellow NYr's) kids made fun of my Brooklyn accent too. It's tough not to notice.
BTW- My d wears her Uggs and she's at school upstate NY. I don't get it either- I think they're pretty ugg-ly.</p>
<p>But the Uggs supposedly "work," warmth-wise. I don't think that students unacclimatized to snow are buying Uggs for looks.;)</p>
<p>marny, I hope you don't go. I'll need your advice for D2, & you know what I'm talking about!</p>
<p>I don't get the Ugg thing either. I'm sure they are warm, but I looked at a pair once, and on the inside they're just flat like a big fuzzy bedroom slipper. So, why so expensive?
However, as a lifelong sneaker-wearer, I'm not a good candidate for the fashion police!</p>
<p>Hey we live in the midwest and all the kids wear uggs! Did you know they make "man uggs" too!?
The sentence that got me was the about Edline. I gave up on Edline when my son got to 8th grade. Edline made me crazy so I don't even check his work. He is on his own as far as grades go.</p>
<p>Edline isn't utilized much here. Our district uses it mostly for schedules, progress reports, and report cards, which we get on paper anyway.</p>
<p>The quote that caught my eye was the one about "cultivating passions to impress college admissions officers." This is where things could really backfire and breed resentment if kids are "encouraged" to put a lot of time and effort into something they're not crazy about.</p>
<p>I don't know about you, but I was constantly amazed at the number of activities my ds friends were involved with growing up. I felt like I was the anamoly, in that I only "allowed" my d to choose 2 activities. I did not care which 2, but only 2. I wanted her to be a kid first. I believe she has benefited from developing those interests rather than skimming the service in multiple activities. I am still involved as her parent--my job so to speak--and will miss her terribly when she leaves next fall for college.</p>
<p>I only "allowed" my d to choose 2 activities. I did not care which 2, but only 2. I wanted her to be a kid first. </p>
<p>APOL- I know what you mean.</p>
<p>It reminds me of over-bred dogs. A bunch of nervous "skitzy" little adult wanttabes. The result of resume' building "forced" interests will come back to haunt some of these kids (and their parents) someday.</p>
<p>My S attends a "high-powered" private prep school. All boys, 87 in his class and 49 were either NMS finalist (25) or commended (24). He has made top grades, top standardized scores, etc. but what stands out is that he has FUN. </p>
<p>I too limited the number of outside activities at any one time to 2. He learned how to ski because he wanted to. Tried out (and often got) roles in plays that were not school sponsored if it struck his fancy. He actually knows how to chill out. Also, he worked and made money to pay gas, car insurance and spending money. Now that he's a senior he is spending his money for things that he wants to do and takes pride that he doesn't have to ask me for everything (permission and the $$ to pay for what he wants).</p>
<p>What has really been telling this year as we go through the college application process is the reaction when the parents and their kid find out that there are a WHOLE LOT of other kids who also did the resume' bit and that it doesn't always pay off. Sort of like, what if you had no childhood and it did not get you in the "RIGHT" school?</p>
<p>Over the long haul, I think having had a childhood and less manufactured stress is going to make for happier and more self-satisfied adults.</p>
<p>I'm with you 07Dad, my H and I said "two" to all our boys also. Interesting enough if you concentrate on one or two things you really love, you can get pretty good at them. All three ski, every second they can, but all three chose something different for number two. We put our parental feet down and said no, no, no, to traveling soccer, kiddie football and everything that got in the way of Saturday when the boys were young and don't regret that for one minute. We're rare parents in our neck of the woods and are often looked at as "foreign" by the neighborhood, but I'm just really anti-overprogramed kiddos and I'm really "Pro" downtime - for the kids and for H and I . I also require all butts at the dinner table almost every night and I work full time. Some days I feel like I'm swimming against the current. The irony is I think even the kids like sitting down to dinner together - we have some really interesting and great conversations and with the oldest heading off to college this fall I don't requet any of those decisions for one minute.</p>
<p>I read in WSJ yesterday that many employers are accepting this as a fact and are going after helicopter parents for recruiting.</p>
<p>I have read that too but it seems totally ridiculous to me. If I were a recruiter, any parental involvement involving contact with the potential employer would be an immediate reason to move that person's resume to the reject pile!</p>
<p>And I speak as a person who has been highly involved with my kids. They pretty much keep my husband and me informed about anything (jobs, programs, internships) they are applying for, and discuss the pros and cons with us.</p>
<p>I thought simba was kidding re: the WSJ article!</p>
<p>Please tell me that a recruiter would have serious doubts about the independence and matuirty of a prospective employee who has his MOMMIE or DADDY make an application for him or her?</p>
<p>Is anyone out there in the recruiting business? Please set us straight.</p>
<p>For anyone that might be interested. New Zealand is seeking immigrants who either are young with college degrees or have certain job skills. Your young adult children should check it out, my HS senior has.</p>
<p>If I have to be involved to get my adult S a job in the US after college graduation, it ain't going to happen.</p>
<p>It isn't a joke. This is the link to the thread on parents getting involved with kids jobs for after college!</p>