<p>What if his roommate wants to watch an x-rated movie? Will he or you object to that?? I think it’s really hard to restrict some other adult’s behavior. And, as others have said, what if the roommate acquires a GF ? And by oct they want some alone time but are not actually " doing the deed" ? Will your son inquire or object? Will he ask what they are doing??</p>
<p>We joke about dorm questionnaires. Every kid we know and have talked to in casual conversations is (self-proclaimed) neat, easy to get along with, open-minded, tolerant of other cultures, religions, and life styles, etc…you get the picture. I don’t think any of these kids are intentionally lying but that maybe they are not very self-aware yet. I think schools would be getting into questionable areas when they start asking about religion- it is really not their business. In addition I’m not sure they get very accurate answers with their surveys in some cases.</p>
<p>Actually, there might be a better chance of a chaste room mate if the room mate is Muslim or Orthodox Jewish. Neither so much as shake hands with people of the opposite sex.</p>
<p>And if goings-on in the room are the issue that OP’s son is worried about, I would be just as worried about having an avid video gamer or sports fan as my roomie–roomie might always be having loud groups of people over, and those video games parties can go very late in to the night. They would be just as disruptive. And they might even be conservative Christians.</p>
<p>I am not intending to be snarky with my above post–just realistic.</p>
<p>OP, have you checked out the Christian Colleges topic in the College Search forum here on CC? That might be most helpful for you. There is a lot of discussion as to which schools are truly conservative and have the kinds of rules you are seeking for your son.</p>
<p>Niqui:</p>
<p>“Don’t place such an emphasis on your son’s roommates religious affiliation”</p>
<p>Did I say anything about my son’s roommate’s religious affiliation?</p>
<p>Oldmom:</p>
<p>“I just don’t understand how you believe those behaviors are exclusively Christian or Catholic.” </p>
<p>I didn’t say they were.</p>
<p>Boysx3:</p>
<p>"There is a lot of discussion as to which schools are truly conservative and have the kinds of rules you are seeking for your son. "</p>
<p>I’m well aware of conservative Christian and Catholic colleges, but thanks. The problem, as stated in the OP, is that very few of them have a linguistics major.</p>
<p>Cheekymonkey and Boysx3:</p>
<p>I already acknowledged that the kinds of rules I am talking about would not solve all my son’s problems. He would still have to learn to compromise and negotiate with his roommate(s) over other kinds of behaviors. Those “learning and growing” opportunities would not be lost. ; )</p>
<p>I shouldn’t have posted while making dinner. The other part of that is that certain behaviors are easily identified AND are more often answered truthfully on questionnaires. The number of kids who are willing to answer questions about their sex life, alcohol and drug use etc. truthfully is much lower than the number of kids who will truthfully answer about their cleanliness and wake up times. Some school we visited (can’t remember which) said they didn’t do a roommate questionnaire because they found too many times the answers weren’t truthful or had changed since the questionnaire was filled out.</p>
<p>If your son absolutely rejects any sort of behavior that does not agree with his " world view" of how the sexes should interact prior to marriage, I strongly suggest a single room. That way he cannot be offended by any roommates behavior or, now or in the future. I mean this most sincerely . I would be highly offended if my roommate started asking me on the first day of school if I planned on having premarital sex or his opinion on anything I did. It’s really none of his business. What if he advertised on Facebook or told the college that he’s very religious and strongly disapproved of physical intimacy prior to marriage? I’m sure they would be very accommodating finding a single.</p>
<p>Hey- just thought of something. Does BYU have a linguistics major? They must fit OP 's requirements.</p>
<p>Why, yes, they do!</p>
<p><a href=“http://linguistics.byu.edu/linguistics/ba/[/url]”>http://linguistics.byu.edu/linguistics/ba/</a></p>
<p><a href=“http://www.byu.edu/oncampushousing/sng_guidelines.shtml[/url]”>Message;
<p>
BYU sounds perfect…</p>
<p>Let me try to explain this another way. My family are Christians, and we consider premarital sex to be sinful. OK? Everyone knows that, it’s not news. And believe it or not (I don’t care which), my son’s beliefs and preferences are his own. </p>
<p>Now suppose that someday it becomes common on college campuses to do something that EVERYONE today agrees is sinful; let’s say, torturing kittens. Now there is one Backward Sect that, even in the 22nd Century, clings to the belief that torturing kittens is wrong. </p>
<p>One member of the Backward Sect wants to know whether it’s still possible to get a dorm room in a state university that is free from kitten-torturing. If not, that’s fine, he’ll either go to one of his Backward Sect colleges, or he’ll learn to deal with kitten-torturing; maybe limit kitten-torturing to every other week or something, so he only has to deal with a little bit of it. (Someone suggests that who knows, if he has an Open Mind, once school starts he may even find out that he LIKES torturing kittens. ; )</p>
<p>But step one is to find out whether it’s possible to avoid kitten-torturing entirely, since that is his preference. This doesn’t mean that he wants to ban kitten-torturing for everyone else, who evidently can’t live without it. He just wants to know whether it’s possible to avoid it in the room where he will be living and sleeping for the next 4-5 years. Once he gets the answer to that question, he can weigh it along with the other factors that go into making his decision. </p>
<p>Now eliminating kitten-torturing from his dorm room won’t resolve all behavioral issues. His roommates might be loud snorers or incorrigible drunkards, or never put the cap back on the toothpaste. But these things are easier for the Backward Sect guy to deal with than kitten-torturing. </p>
<p>I hope that helps people to see the point of my post. </p>
<p>(P.S. I’m sure some of you will find it outrageous to compare premarital sex with torturing kittens. Bear in mind that this is just an illustration. The kitten-torturing analogy is to help you understand the idea of an act which is intrinsically wrong, which is how a devout Catholic views premarital sex. Just as an animal lover, and most other people for that matter, would not want to live in a room where kittens are regularly tortured, by the same token a devout Christian would rather not live in a place where premarital sex is going on, if it can be helped. This isn’t because he’s suffering from unhealthy repression or a need to control people, but simply because he understands it as something intrinsically sinful, as other people might view kitten-torturing.)</p>
<p>That was a poor analogy. </p>
<p>But seriously, listen to cheeky. Look into BYU.</p>
<p>Niqui and Cheeky:</p>
<p>Yeah, that’s the answer: Banish the Christians to the ghetto. If they refuse to conform to the norm, let them go elsewhere. ; )</p>
<p>Honestly . Sex and torture? A biological imperative and tormenting helpless animals? You have a real interesting mindset.</p>
<p>Now you’re comparing BYU to a ghetto? What planet are you on? It was a legitimate suggestion. I know a very conservative kid who goes there and likes it a lot.</p>
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<p>I really wasn’t going to wade in here, but I just can’t help but point out that he is going to be surrounded by sinners. We are ALL sinners, and we ALL sin. Therefore your son is going to be surrounded by sin.</p>
<p>Is it worse for you/him that the sin might be other adults having a consensual relationship instead of other adults engaged in online gambling or drug use or cheating or bullying? I can think of lots of other sins I would not want my college age kid exposed to, but unfortunately I cannot shield him from reality.</p>
<p>PSU85Mom:</p>
<p>“Some school we visited (can’t remember which) said they didn’t do a roommate questionnaire because they found too many times the answers weren’t truthful or had changed since the questionnaire was filled out.”</p>
<p>Your point is well taken.</p>
<p>You don’t want to “conform to the norm”, but yet, you don’t want to go to a school that has the rules that you want. Really?</p>